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I?m a fifty-something, accomplished professional with a tale of personal change; a story of my progressive sexual journey.

I have wanted for nothing over the years, except sexual intimacy, and it drove much of my daily thinking and even my professional ambitions ? and now I want to share a quick summary of how I went from a shy, awkward introvert who thought sex was missionary-style only, to . . . well, to my current interests and proclivities, which include bi-sexual tendencies.

Ever since I was a young, young boy, I was aware of sexual differences, and I so, so enjoyed the female form. Of course, my young tastes were very immature. Basically, I knew that I liked women?s breasts. As young as five years old I was aroused at encyclopedia images of bare-breasted Pocahontas showing the early pioneers the ways of Indians. Playing doctor with the neighbor boys did nothing for me, but when the neighbor girls played ? well ? I can tell you that boys as young as seven or eight can have erections.

I didn?t know why, but I certainly appreciated a physical attraction for women?s bodies. And, over time this attraction intensified, and to be honest, I lusted over friends? Moms, teachers, church ladies, grocery store check-out clerks, and one of my favorite sources of inspiration ? the J.C. Penny?s lingerie section.

Masturbation came early as a result. I remember shooting blanks ? no semen until I was about twelve years old. It was very confusing when I first shot my first hot load of semen. I thought something was wrong, then figured out what was happening after the second and third time. This became very fun and I loved to be alone enough to practice lots.

As a high-schooler, I had a job out in the country-side pumping gas, and had only a few customers late in the evening.

A couple of girls started hanging out frequently, and even though they weren?t ravishing beautifies, I could tell they wanted me, and they could tell I wanted them. One evening, one of the girls asked me if I wanted to fuck them.

I was a shy fellow, and in a way, socially inept and introverted. On the other hand, I was also very motivated. It didn?t take long till we were all getting naked and down to biology (after quitting time ? I was very bound to honor with my employer). After I locked the front door, the clothes came off, and we got down to biology. I lost my virginity in an fmf. So hot.

Time went on, with very infrequent sexual experiences with a partner. I was very painfully shy and introverted. I eventually got married, and our wedding night, and our many years together with my wife were wonderful ? full of sexual fulfillment and deeply satisfying companionship.

I won?t go into it, but something very terrible happened, and I was suddenly alone. It took me a while to get over her, but in time, my biological needs, and my emotional needs gradually set me free, in some strange ways.

I finished raising my children, but needed the help of au pairs. There was never anything but appropriate behavior. Never was there a hint on my part of inordinate interest. I needed the help of these young international ladies, so I treated them professionally, but also as a family member.

On the other hand, one of them stood out to me, and I did fantasize about her, a lot. She was attractive, platinum blonde with a Dutch-boy hair cut, with large breasts and narrow hips and lovely legs. We did spend time in the evening watching TV after the kids were in bed, and eventually started drinking wine too. But, her time was up, and she returned to her home country. We kept only loose track of each other through e-mail. But, I never fully got over her.

As fate would have it, she returned to the U.S. several years later, and in her mid-twenties. And, she had graduated to a very hot and flirtatious woman, and though it was quite unintended, we ended up in bed together, for about two weeks when the kids were away to summer camp. It was so awesome, but my older children wouldn?t tolerate the relationship, and we agreed to part ways as friends with benefits. We?ve seen each other three times since, but she?s now married and has a very lovely family. We still exchange e-mails with no mention of our sex-ploits. Better that way for both of us. Every once in a while she drops a hint of a reminder of what we enjoyed. ?

There were literally no other physical encounters over the years as the kids matured. I gave them my entire life, except what I gave my job, which took care of us all very handsomely.

Several women over the course of time took an interest in me, but I was haunted by my loss years earlier, and my path never crossed with a woman I could take seriously in a relationship, physical or emotional. You don?t have to believe me. I did suffer silently with my physical and emotional needs, but never met a woman that I would be willing to give my heart a chance with.

As an empty-nester though, I felt free of that constant burden, and the new sense of freedom gave me a an even greater sense of personal adventure. I even gathered the kids together and said, that I was planning on looking for a companion ? a lady to keep me company, to be my companion.

The kids actually encouraged that many times as they grew up, but it wasn?t in me to do that. But now, I felt a license to hunt.

I was now a very accomplished executive, and had a wide network of professional friends, and my new-found freedoms were a frequent topic of conversation. A couple of trusted friends encouraged me to try internet dating. I was against it at first, but one lonely night, I decided to do some internet searches, and I found a couple of swinger and adult dating sites, which immediately intrigued me. I remembered the fling with my au pair, and my pre-marital sex in the country with teen-aged girls, and suddenly I was inspired.

Then reality set in. Single males were at a severe disadvantage on swinger and adult dating sites, but the idea of meeting women for sex was totally exciting to me, so I decided on persistence.

I surfed profiles, day after day, for weeks, looking at pics of women, couples and even men. One fateful evening, I fell into chatting with a lady who was looking for another man for an mfm.

To be honest, I was a bit intimidated by being nude and having sex with a woman, with her husband watching, but over the course of time, chatting with both of them, we all felt like it?d be safe to have a meeting.

They blew me away. I really enjoyed their company and their personalities. They were intelligent and obviously very considerate of me. She was my age, early 50?s, and very, very beautiful and sexy. And he, was just a regular, likeable guy, and thankfully, not a perfect specimen of man. Gravity and age had been kind, but had left their mark on him.

And most of all, they were experienced swingers, and very excited about initiating me into the lifestyle as their ?special? friend.

One Friday evening, after a couple bottles of wine at my house, and loads of fun conversation, I agreed to go with them to their weekend house in the mountains for a weekend of nudity and play.

I was so nervous about this, but if you?ll forgive me, I?ll skip the details and just say, that the three of us quickly found a sexual rhythm and erotic understanding that turned into a two-year poly-amorous relationship. We kept it secret from others, which made it so much more exciting. Our time together was always nude, and for the most part, he and I only gave her mutual attention. On the other hand, during the second year, he and I would give each other some personal attention when she was at work, or shopping, or on travel. Occasionally, he and I would even travel together and we would pleasure each other.

Our poly-amory exploits went international and eventually, led to inviting other men and women into our bedroom. It was hot, very hot; but all things must come to an end, when he started to be jealous of me and other men, and the relationship ended ? permanently and completely. We?ve never exchanged a single word since our otherwise amicable break-up.

But I was forever changed. I personally didn?t want another poly-amory relationship, but I?d learned that being nude and aroused in the presence of another man, and even male-to-male touching can be fun.

I am still awkward in group settings, when it comes to talking about me, or my personal life, though, with the cover of professional responsibilities, I can hold audiences and board rooms spell-bound with my presentations and speeches. So, by day, in my profession, I?m a self-confident, even cocky executive, but in my private life, in the quiet of my empty home, I?m very self-conscious and doubtful about my sexual attractiveness. For over a year, I had no luck whatsoever in my personal life to find another woman or couple which afforded me a similar sexual freedom, but I kept looking.

Then, on an international business trip, I ended up at the bar with another U.S. business man. After several drinks and getting to know each other, the conversation shifted to sexual experiences. He bragged about several conquests while on the road ? younger foreign women in south america, an fmf in the far east, and an older gal in the U.S. Then he pressed me for some of my experiences, and I went straight to the two-year affair with the married couple.

He acted fascinated by the idea of poly-amory, and the more the two of us talked, the more I realized he was interested in the m-m aspects of a long-term relationship with a married couple.

So, our conversation ended up right there ? talking about me and my man-on-man experiences, which were limited to hand-jobs and very light-weight bi-sexual experiences. I caught the bar tender?s glances and realized he was eaves dropping. I was getting a little uncomfortable with the open-air conversation. On the other hand, I was really enjoying answering this guy?s questions. So, without much thought I asked him if he?d like to come up to my room and share a bottle of wine.

He didn?t hesitate and said, ?yes?. I turned to the bartender and said, ?send a couple bottles of Clos DuBois Merlot up to my room, and I picked up both tabs, and we headed up to my room on the executive floor. The bar tender smiled at me, and scooped my payment and large tip.

Secretly, I thought this might be a very fun possibility. The other guy was ten years my junior and was athletically built, blonde hair and brown eyes. He had on a pair of jeans with no belt, a polo shirt, and sandals. As we rode the elevator up to my floor I took the opportunity to look at him, full in the face, and he did the same with me. I decided to go against all my internal hang-ups, smiled and asked him plainly if he?d like to get naked and continue our conversation with some wine. He blushed, much to my enjoyment, and said, ?I hoped we might try that.?

To make a long story shorter, as soon as we got in the room I asked him if he?d mind if I got undressed, and he asked if we shouldn?t undress each other. We came close and did just that; we began to undress each other, undoing belt buckles first, and before I knew it, our pants were on the floor, shirts flew off, and our underwear came off much more slowly, each of us kneeling in front of the other, drawing them down provocatively.

As we stood there, naked and staring at each other in the eyes, the kiss came very naturally, without a word, and we kissed fully on each other?s mouth, tongues lightly touching, flitting, and our erections spurng immediately, cocks tangling as we kissed. His hands went for my ass and before I knew it, we were grinding against each other, probing our fingers deep into the crack so f each others? asses. It was so hot.

Just when I thought things were about to move to the next level ? to the bed, there was a knock at the door. Our wine had arrived.

I looked out the peep hole and it was our bartender, with a big grin on his face. I grabbed a towel and opened the door to take the bottles and sign the ticket. When I opened the door, I apologized for my appearance, and the bar tender simply smiled and said, ?its OK sir. I overheard your conversation and offered to bring up the wine even though I?m off shift now.? His eyes drifted provocatively toward the bulge under my towel.

He handed me the two bottles, and of course, my towel popped off just as I let my second hand off the ever-important towel knot holding it up.

So, there I was, a naked, hard man in my room behind me, and I?m sporting my own erection to the bar-tender-cum-room-service attendant.

I started to apologize as I put the bottles on the floor to sign the ticket, and the bartender said, ?please, sir, its OK. I was hoping something interesting might happen.?

He hesitated the slightest moment, and said, ?nice cock sir.?

My inhibitions were lowered andI said, ?wanna come in??

He didn?t hesitate, and without a word, stepped into my room.

So, my other friend, nude and hard, was a little surprised, but I said, ?he?s sexy don?t you think??

My first friend asked, ?can you get us free porn??

The bartender laughed, and before I knew it, I, the fifty-something guy, was frolicking in the king-size hotel bed with a forty-something and thirty-something guy.

Again, I wont go into the details, but some vivid, erotic memories and experiences occurred, I felt two cocks rubbing against my body. At one point my cock was in one of the guy?s mouths as I was kissing the other. A cock was thrust in my face and I quickly slurped it into my mouth as I felt a hand lubricate the valley between my ass cheeks, and then felt a cock gliding and grinding down there.

I sucked both guys until they came in my mouth. I?d never done that before, and one of the guys had me perform partial-anal sex on him, asking me to put my tip on his anus and apply thrusting pressure against him when I came. We cavorted all night long. It was so hot to have two guys tangling their limbs and cocks with mine. We got lost in the lust, and afterward, even lay there whispering and kissing in the afterglow.

It was an awesome experience, and now I find myself open to these experiences with guys. On the other hand, nothing turns me on like a sexy woman, clothed or unclothed, their biological design is most perfect for my desires. Guy-on-guy comes in as a second, but pleasurable option.

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