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A smart woman who is deeply sexual
FORUMS > General Discussions > Fantasies > A smart woman who is deeply sexual       07-18-2008 19:37 PM
To Gina; Dan must be smooth.........
Airport Security
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Airport Security       07-18-2008 19:32 PM
A year ago I had an out of town trip come up in a hurry. I grabbed the nearest overnight bag and stuffed a few things in, got my airplane ticket and was off. I passed through airport security without a wrinkle. When I got there and unpacked I found out I had packed an overnight case we had used to go to a party where I was demonstrating some blade play. It included 3 blades ranging in length from 8" to a 15" razor sharp Bowie (all sheathed of course). I was amazed the bag went through x-ray as a carry on. And I was relieved I didn't have to explain my error and lose some of my best blades. Not to press my luck, I boxed it all and mailed it back. But, my faith in airport security was shaken. Beyond that I have learned to travel without anything and make usable toys from a Home Depot stop. Chain, rope, connectors, dowel rods, hard wood blanks, instant toy box. Making restraints from rope is a macrame project (friendship knot?). Once, on a trip to Nashville(?) I spent half my evening giving restraint making lessons at the 1st Amendment (?) after an interested group saw us play.....lol ...(?) means my memory may not be as accurate as I hope....lol
private party , ok to inquire who else is coming
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > private party , ok to inquire who else is coming       07-18-2008 19:17 PM
Most house parties we attend use the evite system, showing who was invited and who has rsvp'ed.
A smart woman who is deeply sexual
FORUMS > General Discussions > Fantasies > A smart woman who is deeply sexual       07-18-2008 00:36 AM
Why is this under fantasies? I know a large collection of these.
both new to this and are interested where and how do we start
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > both new to this and are interested where and how do we start       07-17-2008 23:54 PM
BDSM is art. Find someone who understands it to get you started. Many things in BDSM are like magic tricks, if you do them right the audience applauds wildly, wrong and people get hurt.
private party , ok to inquire who else is coming
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > private party , ok to inquire who else is coming       07-17-2008 10:43 AM
I was using the massage group as an example. Many groups have parties with specific expressed or implied protocols. I am aware of bi expected groups we do not attend parties with, which is our choice. Many parties and groups of friends have set ways of doing things. I personally enjoy the long tease of massaging 4 to 6 different female types and knowing all of them are there for further exploration later. And when it's my turn, 8 to 12 hands, lotion, soft female flesh touching me everywhere at once, it is a small piece of nirvana. My suggestion is always get a guest list, talk to the host about what is expected or normally happens, if any of this makes you uncomfortable don't go.
What is wrong with Married men swinging alone
FORUMS > Successful Swinging > Finding Playmates > What is wrong with Married men swinging alone       07-15-2008 16:28 PM
On a rare occasion, my lady is out of town for business or family reasons without me. It is not unusual for her to have someone lined up to keep me taken care of during those times. I get a text saying something like keep Sat. night open. Then Sat. I get an email with instructions as to where to go, and who I am picking up there. Sometimes it's an old friend, sometimes someone I have never met. We do diner and if all clicks, enjoy the evening fully. While I do not arrange dates on my own, I enjoy these little acts of kindness from my beautiful lady.
private party , ok to inquire who else is coming
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > private party , ok to inquire who else is coming       07-15-2008 16:19 PM
We always find out the guest list, and look for people we know who can give us some idea what we are getting into. Many private parties have protocols that don't fit our style. We belong to a group which meets periodically for group massage. Everyone is expected to help massage everyone else. After all have been massaged, it is not considered proper to turn down advances from the opposite sex. You can, but you pretty much never get invited back. So, unless you are ready for that kind of semi-selective action (I feel cheap like just a piece of meat sometimes, but I get over it....lol) it would not be the party for you. Find out what you are getting into.
Question that should not be asked
FORUMS > General Discussions > Men Talk > Question that should not be asked       07-15-2008 14:59 PM
Many people seem to find safety after enjoying anothers partner in trying to open a conversation about the act rather than who they are as people. This defines boundaries, looks for acceptence, and tries to establish some commonality. If the spirit has been laughter one response works, if it hasn't the question was a bit cloddish. Not every couple works. I think finding another couple to get naked with regularly is at least as hard as finding another person to put up with you daily. We have a lady friend who travels with us, weekends with us occasionally, does social things with one or both of us almost nightly. Her husband plays occasionally, but prefers D&D with his friends to a karaoke night with naked hot tub splashing after. We feel so lucky to have her in our life. But, when we play with other couples, she'd be the first one to ask "could your man get it hard again after I was finished with him???"......lol. Some folks have no tact, but are still nice people.
Flirting at the workplace
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > Flirting at the workplace       07-15-2008 14:42 PM
Being old school, flirting is (should be) a normal part of human interactions. Workplace protocols to flirting have gotten fuzzy, but mostly because too many people are bad at it. Flirting in the workplace is not foreplay. It's just a way to make people feel good about themselves and make getting through the day together a little easier. The more pop culture fuckable the coworker, the less flirting can take place (fuckable people often take flirting too seriously or see it as stalking). Flings, non-swinging social fucking, can lead to misunderstandings. In my seniority, I try to avoid flings and revel in the beautiful life I already enjoy.
The sense of smell
FORUMS > The Bi Sexual Swinger > Bi Couples > The sense of smell       07-15-2008 14:30 PM
Most perfumes make me sneeze, often at a bad time. Most people we play with are sensitive to this and make an effort, like I take antihistimines when we visit cat people (another allergy). I love the real scent of a woman, how it changes as her passion awakens, how her diet effects her scent (do a double with a Vegan and a Carnivore, the differences are so enjoyable). I don't need a cosmetic company to help me enjoy the scent of a woman.
Condomless STD Prevention
FORUMS > General Discussions > Safe Sex > Condomless STD Prevention       07-15-2008 14:12 PM
In Phoenix a new lubricant "Carrageenan™ Personal Lubricant" made from red algae is being developed and sold (supposed to be countrywide soon). While they can't officially claim it stops STD's, some research has shown the main ingredient does curtail viral growth. I don't know about the health stuff, but it does ride nice on the way to Greektown.
need help understanding how men let other men fuch their wives and not be irrate
FORUMS > General Discussions > Getting Started > need help understanding how men let other men fuch their wives and not be irrate       07-15-2008 14:01 PM
We avoid newer couples because of this. I cannot find a good predictor of how anyone will react seeing their life partner enjoying intimacy with another. I've seen guys who can handle their lady sucking off every guy at a party, even fucking them publically,who goes nutso when they find out the lady went to a private room with one of the other men to spend a few quiet moments just talking. More common is the guy dipping every available flavor while momma lurks in the corner almost shivering, then someone sees her, brings her out, and they are gone 5 minutes later. For me, I don't own my partner. They don't own me. We choose to love and trust and depend on each other. There is never a doubt who is family, who we are going home with, where we are safe and adored. Swinging is a fun evening. Being too old for football, it gives us a chance to excercise with others, get to know others (get inside others...lol), and socialize without alot of pretensions.
Getting Head and Cumming
FORUMS > General Discussions > Men Talk > Getting Head and Cumming       07-15-2008 13:47 PM
Sperm can carry diseases. Saliva and stomach acids kill the diseases. The concerns come from getting sperm from point A to point B. Oral sex is a low risk transmitter. For safety it is suggested you don't brush your teeth within about 2 hours prior to going down on someone. Bleeding gums is your highest risk factor. If someone shoots in your mouth, swallowing it all and quickly is the safest approach. Trying to hold it to spit later, or even quick attempts to spit, leave more residue than a simple swallow. That being said, invading another with fluids without permission is not cool.
Do REAL doms want sex with slaves
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Do REAL doms want sex with slaves       07-15-2008 13:30 PM
I find sex and BDSM all depends on the scene that is designed. Some scenes find energy from pain, some connection and heirarchy, some even from laughter. A scene as foreplay has it's place. But, the edge and tease needs to have it's denouement.
WHO IS BARAK HUSSEIN OBAMA
FORUMS > General Discussions > Politics > WHO IS BARAK HUSSEIN OBAMA       07-15-2008 13:18 PM
"all you are going to get is four years of gridlock and nothing gets done." Somehow I cannot see how that would be bad. I do not trust government or politicians to work in any best interest but their own. When something catches the whole public's interest, things happen. But otherwise, I prefer a nice balance of inactivity.
WHO IS BARAK HUSSEIN OBAMA
FORUMS > General Discussions > Politics > WHO IS BARAK HUSSEIN OBAMA       07-14-2008 23:45 PM
We, as Americans, overrate the damage one person can do as president. However, if we, as Americans, are stupid enough to again give one party control of the two elected branches of government, we deserve what we get. I am voting McCain for no other reason than that the most likely Congress will be Democrat. Someone needs to be able to veto the insanity and force a supermajority for reasonable federal laws and compromise judges..
Bummed out
FORUMS > General Discussions > B.B.W. > Bummed out       07-14-2008 23:37 PM
We've been on here since it opened, but haven't met a couple from here (except when we travel) in about 3 years. We met a few couples in the beginning, found a few parties, then whittled down to a nice group of about 6 couples we became closer with. Life and stuff shuts us down periodically, but we can always go back to the old friends, find a meet and greet, and start again. Remember the net is very impersonal, written words come out stronger that oral ones, and its easy to be rude to people you don't have to look in the eye. Find real situations, M&G's and you'll find people who will enjoy you.
Advice needed! How would you approach this
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Advice needed! How would you approach this       07-14-2008 23:30 PM
I have multiple partners, but this former lover chick even sounds scary to me. Run, don't walk, away. There are plenty of sane people to play with.
SJAMBOKS
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > SJAMBOKS       07-06-2008 11:39 AM
Had one in my bag for about 10 years now. It can make a nice swoosh behind bound and exposed partners, but it hits hard and can leave bruising easily. A play careful toy. Enjoy
Female here: First Time Disappointment-Is that normal Men's opinion is appreciated
FORUMS > General Discussions > Men Talk > Female here: First Time Disappointment-Is that normal Men's opinion is appreciated       03-20-2007 10:56 AM
From my male perspective, if I start action with a willing lady, I take personal responsibility for her enjoying the time. While almost every time this will include her "O", my mindset is to make the time pleasureable either way. Because of obvious plumbing differences, her first and often is the prime directive. And never would anyone feel vacated or abandoned during the afterglow. Thats all a part of the total package. My bottom line, you ran into a jerk. There are much better couples out there.
Carnival Pride Mexican Rivera 3-11-3-18
FORUMS > Travel, Clubs and Resorts > Travel > Carnival Pride Mexican Rivera 3-11-3-18       03-07-2007 11:32 AM
We have two couples spending a week Cruising..... Anyone else on the ship??? We could set up a Meet and Greet lol
A white lie
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > A white lie       07-08-2006 11:26 AM
I was born in 1950, my lady 1970. Together we are contemporaries. I look, act, perform (lol) as if I am late 30's early 40's. I have never had a major medical issue, could still go a few rounds if the bell rings. After we meet people the usual reaction is "damn you're really 55 ???". This is after explaining their initial reservations at meeting with a couple with an "old guy". Would lying about age be an acceptable white lie in a swing profile ??
Moral Values and Swinging How do they co-exist with you
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > Moral Values and Swinging How do they co-exist with you       07-08-2006 10:44 AM
There are a variety of ways to connect with the universal energy (God?). Physically these can be mind altering orgasms (Tantra), body altering sensations(Sun Dance, Modern Primitive type body body and mind tests), and couple altering behaviors (BDSM, Swinging). Emotionally one can connect to the world in many forms of fellowship (churches, clubs, tight swing circles). The protocols for these social interactions could loosely be called morals. In some biker clubs swapping old ladies is acceptable, in others it isn't... saying one is more acceptable or right than the other only means you are more likely to join that club. My "morals" are who I am, inwardly accepted not outwardly enforced. There are no conflicts to resolve.
slave
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > slave       07-08-2006 10:20 AM
A begets B...... you act/become more dominant/self assured/in control. As you accept and embrace your role, she will likely accept and embrace hers. Once she trusts you have things covered, she can let go.
one partner wants to the other one doesn't
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > one partner wants to the other one doesn't       06-02-2006 03:56 AM
This must be one of those girl/guy things and the postings here seem to promote the old saw that swinging is a female dominated hobby. I (male) have had no trouble taking one for the team on occasion. I am clearly owed a few in the situation where I find someone interesting and she doesn't find the male counterpart interesting ever occurs. While I am more picky in who actually attracts me, who I enjoy talking to, dancing with, socializing with, I have no real trouble fucking about any female (a guy thing?) We do have a fairness principle in place, and if that elusive woman of my lusty dreams ever appears, she will damn well take one for our team.........
NO- with or without reason
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > NO- with or without reason       06-01-2006 10:51 AM
We use chemistry as the all purpose no reason, since no one really knows what that is.,,,lol
What do you like best on you woman
FORUMS > General Discussions > Men Talk > What do you like best on you woman       06-01-2006 10:29 AM
Cat suits (full body stockings) can be very flattering
The UN-Approachable Factor
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > The UN-Approachable Factor       05-26-2006 06:31 AM
There is a disconnect, class system, separation of church and state in swinging.....It's been 30 years since this 55 yr old weightlifters body has been in a size 0 anything......lol....but I'm not really sure I'd want such a morsel if offered it (I might roll over and snap something.....) I guess if you're just in it for the fucking, any harbor in the storm would do, but we tend to socialize before and after, date some, find things to do with cocks soft and smiles hard. The disconnect is usually on this level too (a nice gorge at the Steakhouse appeals to us more than a workout at Gold's followed by a power drink......lol).. In the end swinging is just another form of dating. If I wanted a 20 yr old hard body I could probably rent one pretty cheaply anymore..... if I'm looking for friends to go yell at the umpires at a D-backs game, they gotta drink a few beers and eat a few chili cheese dogs along the way..... and then we can talk about the game (and burp ever so politely) in the afterglow.......lol
word association
FORUMS > General Discussions > Games > word association       04-10-2006 22:08 PM
blow
word association
FORUMS > General Discussions > Games > word association       04-10-2006 00:43 AM
yogart
Blackmen are definately more Dominant
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Blackmen are definately more Dominant       04-03-2006 15:56 PM
You all understand that with simple statistics we could actually prove that, man for man, Black men are more likely to be unemployed, more likely to have a prison record, more likely to do drugs, more likely to have a social disease, more likely to have high blood pressure, more likely to have AIDs/HIV, and more likely to have children out of wedlock they are not paying support for.... I suppose to some that shows dominance, to me it shows as a class that lacks self discipline which equates to control and/or true dominance..... but any one man does not deserve to be labeled from some group classification (even though I am Swedish and born to massage......lol)..
Blackmen are definately more Dominant
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Blackmen are definately more Dominant       04-03-2006 15:50 PM
Thrills, I tried sarcasm too, but it seems wasted on too many........lol
same room or not
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > same room or not       03-28-2006 10:11 AM
We find is always situational.... we will try to always start in the same room (our first choice) but some folks really prefer separate and we don't mind that either. On more than one occasion we all seem to get the giggles as things are progressing, in those cases we will suggest adjourning to separate rooms to actually have sex, before we rejoin for dessert, and round two.
Any tips for the curious
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Any tips for the curious       03-26-2006 20:48 PM
A nice starting point is a saran wrap mumification/bondage.....get the wrap and wind it around the victim, I mean submissive, in a reasonably firm manner as if you were preparing a leg of lamb for the freezer.... once fully wrapped it is nice to help them lay down somewhere (they tend to lose their balance and fall if just left standing with legs together)...... This has a different set of problems than rope bondage, primarily heat, but a few strategically cut holes and ice cubes helps with temperature regulation (an minor torments)..... be sure to use the more common, off the grocery shelf plastic wrap...... some packing wrap is heat activated shrink wrap and that can become a bit extreme quickly if you happen to say walk out for a smoke and leave your submissive to their sauna for a few minutes (a bdsm no-no, if you are in charge always stay in charge and monitor)
Fisting
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Fisting       03-26-2006 20:38 PM
Most of the ladies have had 6,7,8 9 pound babies popping out, and things seem to come back together nicely with a little excercise. Fisting is a bit of a misnomer, for those with less experience that want to try this. The starting position is usually more like a spear head with the thumb tucked firmly against the palm. Plenty of initial lube helps the process (most I have played with self lube nicely once everything is in place.....lol). Once inside you can often slowly form a more balled up fist position. Be careful with fingernails, I keep mine very close cut and always buffed and filed smooth without any rough spots.
Blackmen are definately more Dominant
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Blackmen are definately more Dominant       03-26-2006 20:26 PM
And Frenchmen smell, and Phillipinos make good pool boys, Mexicans are all lazy, and god only knows what can be said about Jews............lol..... All I know is I sometimes play with a multi ethnic group and they made me an honorary brother (for reasons I won't go into....lol)... but my experience does not substanciate the titled inane assertion........
people disapearing
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > people disapearing       03-23-2006 21:07 PM
I wouldn't take it personal. Sometimes the fantasy of swinging and the reality of the jealousy and other confusions that happen after don't mix. This is not a hobby for everyone.......lol
a woman here: how can I be more outgiong towards men
FORUMS > General Discussions > Men Talk > a woman here: how can I be more outgiong towards men       03-05-2006 20:55 PM
An open posture, no legs crossed or arms is the first step. A pleasant smile my direction works wonders. Conversation that asks about me rather than bitching about waiters, the day, the children, your job or the other people in the room. Then a touch on the arm or even better leg makes even simpletons like me aware you are interested in more than small talk. I guess a lot is a matter of believing you are attracive, knowing what you want, knowing you deserve to be treated like a woman, and taking life by the balls.
How long is too long
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > How long is too long       03-05-2006 20:45 PM
What is an appropriate time in which to respond to a note here?? One couple dropped us a nice note we read on our way out the door Sunday morning....... rather than shoot off a quick response, we decided to wait and write a nicer, fuller note later....... but by the time we got back home to write the note at 6pm Sunday evening, we had been blocked from responding to them........ that, to us, is pretty scary.......lol... So, is a note like "got your note, I'll write later" better than waiting a few hours, thinking about what you want to say, and composing a nice pleasant note later the same day??
adventurous travelors to Orlando
FORUMS > Events > Florida > adventurous travelors to Orlando       03-05-2006 20:41 PM
Orlando is scaring us.......lol...... one couple dropped us a nice note we read on our way out the door Sunday morning....... rather than shoot off a quick response, we decided to wait and write a nicer, fuller note later....... but by the time we got back home to write the note at 6pm Sunday evening, we had been blocked from responding to them........ that, to us, is pretty scary.......lol
adventurous travelors to Orlando
FORUMS > Events > Florida > adventurous travelors to Orlando       03-04-2006 10:39 AM
What are the fun adult things to do in Orlando area... we won a trip to Disney and are going on an adult holiday to DisneyWorld (Oximoron?) We will have a nice hotel room to host from or are looking to fine fun clubs and adult theme parks in the area..... help us out.....lol
Something fun to try
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Something fun to try       02-03-2006 07:59 AM
18. Arizona ......hot and dry
High Heels On During Sex-Is it just a Black Man's Thing
FORUMS > General Discussions > Men Talk > High Heels On During Sex-Is it just a Black Man's Thing       12-02-2005 16:02 PM
I'm reasonably tall, she's short, the right heel let her stand and me not bend too much......
What do YOU mean by Emotional Connection
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > What do YOU mean by Emotional Connection       11-26-2005 08:09 AM
I (Mr.) am poly by nature (and as good choice would have it so is the Mrs).....while I can and have fucked about anything... with a select few I start sharing a deeper bond....I talk to them on the phone and get warm, remember the scents and sounds of them, listen intently to their words and meanings.... I accept a certain freely given ownership for the relationship that evolves....We make plans... for a we exists where there was once two I's....this is challenging for a non-poly person who finds themself a part of the new triad developed...I wish I could just engage in sport fucking, but sometimes, for me, someone touches more than my cock.....
How much would you pay for a private party
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > How much would you pay for a private party       10-31-2005 17:26 PM
I'm guessing for $100 a person you'd dabble in a few hookers, female and male porn star types with big boobs, asses and cocks. They would be sort of party favors.....lol... I'd rather take my own $200 bucks and have two couples over for surf and turf cookout...
bdsm and straight swinging - completely different worlds
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > bdsm and straight swinging - completely different worlds       10-31-2005 10:34 AM
Jeffandjane- I agree there is a vast difference between being assertive and pushy...IMHO pushy guys are rarely dominant (unless you count mama's boys asking to be cared for and/or a passive aggressive stance as dominance). At parties and M&Gs, I tend to hold back, exist, be me... those who enjoy quiet strength will find me.. we will talk frankly about styles and desires before we adjourn somewhere to do something about them(always in front of witnesses if kink is to be involved... I prefer public consent), expectations will be clear (this type of communication is part of the BDSM lifestyle that swingers don't always grasp or feel comfortable with), and when we play I will still keep the spontaneity within the boundaries and guidelines we set. "May I have a hug" is a classic BDSM greeting. Being polite, considerate, and respectful of others needs and boundaries is the norm. But given the right permissions, you will become my toy, a pure object of pleasure....lol...
What do you do when THIS happens
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > What do you do when THIS happens       10-28-2005 09:28 AM
My she is on the patch... while I am V safe, she is a fertile little thing and condoms do break...lol... it has the added advantage of allowing certain alterations of cycles for a few days one way or another (keep it on or take it off slightly off cycle).... this is convienient for travel and party weekends
bdsm and straight swinging - completely different worlds
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > bdsm and straight swinging - completely different worlds       10-28-2005 09:20 AM
To some extent they have to mix....... my girl has trouble finding interest in men who are not take charge kinda guys... while this doesn't have to exhibit in BDSM, it does have to be a natural dominance of personality for her to get any kind of satisfaction..... equality isn't going to cut it, and anyone that wants her to take the lead is pretty much out of luck....lol....... Being male and always feeeling like I am the herd stallion..... I have less trouble.... I include a few domme females as fuck buddies in my life....I'd guess they find me a change of pace...lol Our closest friends include both lifestyles in their bag of tricks, but it would seem only natural that like interests and personalities would attract.....
BDSM and abuse
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > BDSM and abuse       10-27-2005 17:48 PM
"It's not the pain I like it's the release" ...Many bottoms enjoy the destination so endure the journey... these aren't pain sluts to whom the journey is the key and will fight you tooth and nail to avoid the destination..... Words need to mean something to have communications.... I am trying to establish parameters.... some of us have experienced the edgy extremes of the BDSM arts... I've seen too many newbies walk into a scene with a less than reputable top, announce pain slut and no safe word, and then end a bloody mess just short of the emergency room...I am not SSC but RACK, the difference places much responsibility on all involved (this is another whole thread)... and the first responsibilty is to speak the same language.
Real or make believe
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Real or make believe       10-27-2005 11:43 AM
Perhaps a communicator, with your intent Ms Tyde, should have taken the time to have framed a better question to elicit the responses you sought....the only defenses I see are not coming from the responders
BDSM and abuse
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > BDSM and abuse       10-27-2005 11:38 AM
I'm the opposite M, I like to slowly introduce them to the flight, I am the captain, then I try to maintain and extend it as long as I safely can. This does pretty much put a damper on the rest of the evening (why I like two girls for play so they can nurture each other after the session and I can go get a drink....lol).... the varying styles do add to a nice variety of choice for the bottoms.....lol
BDSM and abuse
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > BDSM and abuse       10-27-2005 10:37 AM
Annoucing you're a pain slut always concerns me.... there is such a relativity to WIITWD.... does that include 3rd degree burns? do the bruises heal in 2 days, 6 days, 3 weeks? cuttings for decorative purposes? is it a contest of will or do you just pass out? Sensation play includes some pain, hell I've even sun danced with temp piercings just to see what it felt like (that's when you really wish you had dieted some before....lol) .... the point is, I have seen perhaps one "pain slut" in my life, who welcomed pain to the complete point of shock and body shut down... all the other's I've seen just like the theater
Real or make believe
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Real or make believe       10-26-2005 10:19 AM
Words mask communications...talk is cheap.... actions speak louder than words....if you are relying on words to communicate you are missing most of life.... I wrote the original question off as a silly slut question, the kind you get when they are nervous and trying to fill time and quiet with anything to ease their uncertainty... the follow-up words seemed to justify my orginal thoughts, but then they were only words...........
BDSM and abuse
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > BDSM and abuse       10-15-2005 19:57 PM
We all have abuses, physical or mental, roaming around in our pasts. These range from as simple as being picked last for kickball to sodomy by someone trusted. BDSM arts open one emotionally to readdress past problems.... I have seen scenes structured to recreate a gang rape where the victim felt guilty that they had just given in and should have fought... so a safe scene was set up for her to be gang raped again, this time with permission to fight as hard as she could, assured her most vile struggles would never get her harmed. She found out she was still overpowered, regardless of her best efforts....this was followed by a cleansing ceremony where the guilt and shame was buried in the desert... BDSM is not all kink.
Real or make believe
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Real or make believe       10-15-2005 08:43 AM
How many are truly? Which of you are real? Until you are in their presence, feel the aura of dominance or the welcoming, nurturing energy of submission, all you are looking for is words of assurance. This is not a realm of words but of energy.
How Important Is The Lifestyle To You
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > How Important Is The Lifestyle To You       10-01-2005 11:42 AM
We play poker in a league 4 nights a week, deal with children every other weekend, so once or twice a month get to go out on a date with friends. We look forward to these nights, primp some, shave extra close, even buy new outfits and toys. We are disappointed if the flirting and teasing of the date doesn't end in a group grope and sweaty pile of nudes. Realistically for me, the male, I'm 55 years old and my coworkers and people I just meet all think I am early 40's or younger. The lifestyle is a great motivator to stay living in the moment, take care of myself, find excitement in tomorrow and today. Perhaps self discipline would accomplish the same thing, but being strong and vital for some sweet strange pussy works as a wonderful incentive or reward for me. I give the lifestlye a solid 8 on the keeping me alive and lively meter.
Golf anyone
FORUMS > General Discussions > Men Talk > Golf anyone       10-01-2005 11:28 AM
Look me up if you get to AZ, I'm a nice 5 and know some killer courses....(That's handicap not inches...lol). This reminded me of a group I played in back in OH in the 80's. The men would often golf as two four somes, then go back to dinner with the ladies... My wife at the time (since deceased) had a reputation as a bit of a tight ass ( prude?). The golf group were all swingers, but they were afraid to tell us because of her. For almost a year we were always the first couple to head home after the golf dinner. We later found out keys were tossed in a bowl as soon as we cleared the door to decide who was going home with whom after that (it was the 80's....lol). Finally I caught on to what was happening. I talked it over with my lady and during the next dinner she took off her top, unzipped me, and sucked me good in a public performance. That night became an orgy instead of a nice key party. I miss that golf group, we had a nice run there.
is cuming in her mouth considered un safe sex
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > is cuming in her mouth considered un safe sex       10-01-2005 11:13 AM
It's always about making reasonable choices.... Middle class couples, with nice houses, kids, plenty of health insurance, and a kinky weekend hobby they regularly engage in, strike me as a low risk group for most sexual activities. We have devolved from safe sex fanatics to extended family relationships with a wonderful group of people. Deep kissing and unprotected cumming in this group is as natural as sex at home, but with a bit more heavy breathing. When we occasionally try out a new couple, we falll back to our condom covered ways.... But once they become regular fuck buddies, having passed muster as sane human being with no obvious needle marks or lesions, we toss the latex and enjoy the deepening relationship. We view it all as dating, and once you're going steady there should be a trust factor or why are you going out with them at all?
Is anyone too beautiful for you
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > Is anyone too beautiful for you       09-03-2005 11:34 AM
We play in so many leagues there always has to be one that we can find in common. We embrace the proposition that sex happens between the ears not between the legs. And while we have meet some really beautiful minds along the way, none of them seemed too beautiful to become undeserved or feared for rejection. People have free will... and sometimes a nice fatherly, shaved headed, hairy, dominaint type turns a sexy young nymphets into a pool of mush..... if it doesn't, there are plenty of others who appreciate what my mind has to offer, if even for an evenings adventure.
When Things Get Out of Hand
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > When Things Get Out of Hand       09-03-2005 11:22 AM
If you don't have a well developed sense of self, you probablly shouldn't be getting naked with strangers. There are preditors in and out of the lifestyle. The consideration levels of everyone you meet will vary. How they deal with a no will tell you what you are dealing with. The objection (whine) we hear most is "no real swingers fuck with condoms".......lol
Just as many couple game players as single men
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > Just as many couple game players as single men       09-03-2005 11:15 AM
The internet is the new wild wild west..... there are no rules that can be enforced..... all you can do is take your chances like the rest of us...... couples get disrespected as often as single males......I would guess even the holy grail single females are occasionally stood up or dropped...... I'm glad you had this forum available to lament your state..... now suck it up and get back on the horse
Clinging Dom's
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Clinging Dom's       07-31-2005 13:21 PM
I'd have to agree with Cplin. Knowing I am violating the humble line, as a dominant I find I am a rare commodity. Rare commodities are sought. Playmates, "victims", submissives, and bottoms all seem amply aware of my time, and vie for it. And in this sellers market, an even adequate top dominant has an abundance of willing buyers. If a "dom" is pressing for occasional out of state visits that hard, one could conclude you are the finest submissive and bottom god ever created, or he is not finding a lot of local takers for his expertise (with reason).
BDSM couples MG
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > BDSM couples MG       07-08-2005 14:10 PM
Philly? lol now Vegas.....
What is Risk
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > What is Risk       07-08-2005 09:52 AM
The question needs to be "What is acceptable risk?". That is something that can only be determined by the skill level of each participant. Even playing within the boundaries of that concept, shit happens. Legs collapse without notice and the blade impales under a shoulder, a set of sights and sounds triggers an unfortunate lost memory, the target shifts and the lash bites a tad too deeply. The main risk in each of these situations is of not being in the care of a dominant who will deal promptly and efficiently with the outcomes. Murphy's law is always operating. That is why risk aware is not always safe.
Help us choose a title for our new book on swinging
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > Help us choose a title for our new book on swinging       07-04-2005 14:44 PM
I always thought I's write a book called "Extended Intimacy"......lol
Collared
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Collared       06-30-2005 12:53 PM
Breath play can never be safe, thus the breaking point of the SSC and RACK. To you who think these concepts are the same, I would suggest getting with an edge player and letting them show you the difference.
Collared
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Collared       06-30-2005 12:51 PM
In our area the Rack and SSC folks seem to seperate when it comes to breath play. The claim is the breath play is never
2257 Rules
FORUMS > Suggestions > Website > 2257 Rules       06-21-2005 19:13 PM
michellenbill, Gotta love those full lipped pussies. I think you can still show it as long as you don't touch....lol Doug
2257 Rules
FORUMS > Suggestions > Website > 2257 Rules       06-21-2005 19:04 PM
I guess it's time for the webmaster to beef up the internal IM chat feature, maybe improve cam to cam, add an email feature where we can email attachment photos to potential partners. If they get clever, we should still be able to use this site for it's stated purpose, exchange information and teases, and still make this a viable alternative to chat groups, sex clubs, and swinger meet and greets.
Hotel Bed Security
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Hotel Bed Security       06-19-2005 23:44 PM
We live in the land of irrigation. While enough rope is the easiest answer, I carry my BDSM erector set. This consists of a collection of 1 inch PVC lawn sprinkler pipes and connectors in varius lengths and configurations (weighs about 30 pounds and fits into a 4 ft tent bag). Into some of those connectors I have drilled holes and bolted in eyes. It takes me about 3 minutes to erect a cross that goes under the mattress and allows me wonderful tie offs. Dom Depot is a favorite store.
Must see! Does anyone else find this erotic
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Must see! Does anyone else find this erotic       06-17-2005 17:47 PM
Might be a generational thing.. I still remember "Song of the South" and "Amos and Andy". I still think both are good and/or funny on their merits. I just don't get this.
just a hubbies fantasy
FORUMS > General Discussions > Fantasies > just a hubbies fantasy       06-17-2005 09:26 AM
I have a slut so I have trouble appreciating your scenario. Mine is happy flashing guys at bars, stroking and sucking any cocks that might appear. She is hardly a model figure, but has confidence in her sexuality and female appeal. I think a part of that is that I fully appreciate her, smile with her in her little naughties, hug and kiss her daily. I foster her feeling as my special slut, make her feel good about who she is everyday. So when the opportunity arises she has the support system to act on it.
Oral or Intercourse - What is more intimate
FORUMS > General Discussions > Swinger Advice > Oral or Intercourse - What is more intimate       06-17-2005 09:16 AM
I would agree with expo. Kissing and the dance before and after are more intimate than either oral or intercourse. Those are times of connecting with the person not just enjoying them as a fuck toy. Some couples we have met get very nervous around foreplay but have no trouble once the sucking and banging starts.
Collared
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Collared       05-31-2005 08:33 AM
They call it dominant because you get to decide things like this. Mine as two collars, a day collar which is a stainless steel necklace she wears always until I remove it and replace it with the lifestyle collar, steel and leather with D rings. A swinger once tried to remove her day collar, she nearly had a panic attack...lol. You'll find collars mean a lot.
Music to be played during role play
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Music to be played during role play       05-04-2005 10:46 AM
Rickford and Kimmie, I have friends who are into competetive M/s. I never fully understood the draw, but perhaps you can explain this more for those who have not come into contact with it.
BDSM Cliff Notes needed
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > BDSM Cliff Notes needed       05-04-2005 09:01 AM
M/s for us allows bliss in defined roles and duties. We think of it more in terms of a 50's marriage, kind of "Father Knows Best". He will always have final say, she will always be respected and listened to. She serves, he often serves by being served. We each validate the other, enhance the other, and keep each day as a special celebration of union. We understand the realities of control, the strength of obedience, and the connections and spiritual awakening possible in the intense psychodramas of our scenes. We have just chosen another way to express our love, no one wants to say better or worse, just ours.
Music to be played during role play
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Music to be played during role play       05-02-2005 18:15 PM
Blue Man Group has two albums out heavy in percussion. I have a complete flogging routine worked out to their first album, with varied toys and rhythms. Beating to the beat seems to add something for us.
Ladies What's your preference
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Ladies What's your preference       04-29-2005 19:02 PM
Your forgot latex....lol... I love going out after he has made me a dress of liquid latex....he needs to touch it up a bit every couple of hours, but it usually makes it until the peeling hour........
Being discreet about SM
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Being discreet about SM       04-28-2005 11:39 AM
We are openly known as the "scary couple". We openly shared some experieinces at a first meet once (Sun and Excstacy dancing modern primative style). This was after him sharing some yuppie biker stories. We just thought we were getting to know each other better....lol He turned green and took off, almost in a rude manner, dragging his still very interested wife behind him. 2 weeks later we were at a party and heard the story of the couple that had met a "scary couple" and proceeeded to hear our stories, nicely told but second hand. We died laughing. Since then we have been known as the scary couple. I guess the moral for us is be yourself, but take it slow, not everyone is ready for your reality.
How would you handle this Please help!!
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > How would you handle this Please help!!       04-28-2005 11:22 AM
"we no longer swing in the same bed on first encounters"....While we openly prefer same bed, everybody touching everybody encounters....we have found the same as nymph, that first encounters go better seperate beds, even seperate rooms. Once everyone knows the plumbing, we get together for the king-sized fun. And here I thought we were different...lol
How would you handle this Please help!!
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > How would you handle this Please help!!       04-27-2005 17:59 PM
I agree with honesty but would probably have addressed it in person, on it occuring, and try to "fix" it then. I'm not sure either what "strange mannerisms" entails, but if it isn't happening sexually there are hundreds of other approaches to try and somewhere most two people can find something they can both enjoy with a little communication. The closest parallel we can draw from our experience is once when the preliminaries and the sex went great, but he loosened up in the conversations after and got kinda scary unloading to us as if we were his therapist (bitter over some life setbacks). We told them then it was unsettling to us. It seemed to be appreciated as they had had other "rejections" after the fact but no one had ever said why, which had always left them wondering.
RAWR!!!
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > RAWR!!!       04-27-2005 11:48 AM
I work with 16-20 yr olds everyday. While many of them are cute beyond reason, I have not seen a level of emotional development or experieince shown that would make for a fun double date. If swinging was just about the fucking, and I didn't need to try to socially interact before and/or after, an 18 yr old would be a great treat. But swinging for us is a social activity. Before and after the sheets there's shared laughter, stories, cultural references (try to explain Ward and June Cleaver to an 18 yr old..lol). Our take is the youngsters can be a hot morsel at an orgy, but not as much fun for dinner.
Good lay
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Good lay       04-20-2005 09:28 AM
The memorable ones are the dangerous ones, where you have connected on more levels than the physical.
Attraction and Breast and-or pussy size Which is more important
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Attraction and Breast and-or pussy size Which is more important       04-15-2005 16:40 PM
Give me IQ points and EQ points over anything else.
Newbies
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Newbies       04-13-2005 09:11 AM
Now you see I always thought swing was same room and swap was separate rooms (or sites...lol). Maybe we need a definition section??
Adult Board Game Suggestions
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Adult Board Game Suggestions       04-13-2005 09:09 AM
We've used Apples to Apples as an icebreaker. It lets you get some insight into how people think. As the game progresses, we allow the card winners some option of service, giving or receiving. Usually it eds with a good time by all.
Scary profiles
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Scary profiles       04-13-2005 09:04 AM
Sex police scare me. The only slippery slope I want to be around in here is some large breasts after a titty fuck. We start making hard decisions about what is acceptable and we are all in real trouble. How would you like it if all people with sexual piercings banned as deviant? We all have our kinks and particular joys. Nothing says you have to participate or watch something you find distasteful. Just close the profile and move on.
How Far Would You Go
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > How Far Would You Go       04-01-2005 07:26 AM
hmmm are we strange? Longest is 45 minutes cross town for a party. We have met folks on vacations, cruises or travel destinations (Disney has a great evening activity/sitter arrangement making them a nice swinger destination...lol) but the intent was travel not swinging. Our search of couples within 50 miles yields about 1000 possibilities, add in our yahoo groups maybe 1500 couples out of which we've met several hundred at m&g's and enjoyed a few dozen in more intimate settings. We still have home cooking to explore...lol.
What age do you want
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > What age do you want       03-28-2005 08:52 AM
I have a related question. I'm 54 but look and act younger (I'm sure many in this lifestyle are in my boat here). At meet and greets we make many new friends that had "eliminated" us from consideration because of my listed, authentic age (the misses is 34 btw). It was suggested this weekend by another couple that I should put my age as low 40's or some such lie. I am torn between the white lie which for the most part is irrelevant and truth telling as a life choice......any thoughts?
Mirth
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Mirth       03-21-2005 10:12 AM
I have decided swingers need a code word that signals other swingers in straight party and bar situations but is enough out of the common vernacular that it won't be often misconstrued. Kind of like a secret handshake. The homosexual community has gay, I suggest swingers adopt mirth. You sneak it into a conversation like "the misses and I love fun and mirth". Most people will just think you read too many old novels, but others swingers will catch the "password" and can now start the subtle passions dance with the vanilla culture. What do you think? Any other suggestions for s good signal word? Maybe there already is one and we are in enough to know it...lol.
Group play vs Another couple
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Group play vs Another couple       03-16-2005 17:17 PM
Poly, I'm the large hairy older guy with a goatee, shaved head, and a fanny pack to carry my condoms, sanitary handy wipes, and lube ;->
Group play vs Another couple
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Group play vs Another couple       03-16-2005 12:15 PM
Each activity has it's own joys and flavors. We tend to play more couple to couple, usually easier to organize and more relaxed. Once or twice a year we accept an invitation to a group grope, understanding it is a horse of a different color. And for Poly, the people we group grope with do change condoms after each connection, full or not.....lol. (Although we have to admit to dollar store condoms in a large bowl at one party that looked alot like old balloons-- MD always brings his own-- he hates them and is picky about the right fit)
Domly Actions
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Domly Actions       03-11-2005 17:18 PM
Maybe I just don't appreciate online topping....lol. I couldn't find anything deep or meaningful happening, just play. Could be I wasn't looking in the right place. Still begs the question, what's the first BDSM wisdom you'd share with an inexperienced player/couple?
Domly Actions
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Domly Actions       03-10-2005 20:22 PM
I had a strange opportunity to "witness" an online cam domming. The "slave" was, in theory, following directions, the "dom" in theory, knew what he was doing. From my perspective and experience it was kinda sad. So, in my normally curmudgeonly way, I offered the dom some advice. "The art of mastery is to order slaves to do things they want to do anyway." I could hear the "huh" over the microphone, as she came over his objections and orders to stop. So my question(s) and topic....What advice would you give an inexperienced or new dom(me). And, would you view my advice as having any merit? (interactive discussion since I will follow up and expound upon my ideas if anyone really cares....lol)
Need Suggestions
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Need Suggestions       03-10-2005 20:13 PM
I would suggest finding some CBT sites through a search engine and checking out what can be done. There are many safety considerations which need to be addressed as well as the fantasy aspects of what you are suggesting. My first recommendation would be to find a BDSM club or seminar/convention and get some mentoring. It is irresponsible to toss out ideas without adding all the safety protocols that make them "play" instead of "assault".
Bondage equipment-furniture
FORUMS > General Discussions > BDSM > Bondage equipment-furniture       03-10-2005 20:07 PM
Bought all my stuff on ebay......lol
Hands on your head FELLATIO
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Hands on your head FELLATIO       03-10-2005 20:05 PM
Even BJ's are about communication. I usually test the water with hands on nape of the neck, a little hair grasp. So far, to a woman, they've let me know whether more or less would be appropriate by their actions, pressures, sounds, and movements. I am always trying to "listen" to my partners. The ladies I usually squire tend to be the type that enjoy a good deal of head direction and guidance, but not all. You just have to pay attention.
Ever had this happen A first for us in 8 years
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > Ever had this happen A first for us in 8 years       03-07-2005 21:49 PM
Like many swingers, we are a committed unit of individuals. There is no "I get mine or you don't get yours" mentality. While we insist on attempting to play only with couples, sometimes singles have fallen into the mix. We have split to different rooms when stage fright hit another couple (not our preferred modius operendi) and found ways to enjoy the situation even when one of the participants is off their game. My timing for play is longer than many of the folks we see, so she has found ways to try and draw out (tease) and try to make their encounter last longer. If anyone is really having a bad time, no is always no and we'd all break. But with fun, laughter, getting out the whipped cream or silly string or god knows what toys, we can find a way to enjoy.
talk show couples
FORUMS > General Discussions > Open Forum > talk show couples       03-07-2005 15:10 PM
I saw the Dr. Phil interview and found it a slam on carelessness and stupidity, not on swinging. We know folks we invite into our home. We practiced resonable safety and caution. But we don't need to tell that to Dr. Phil and a national TV audience.