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new to anal : Swingers Discussion 105536
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TOPIC: new to anal
Created by: michbicpl4play The original post for this thread was deleted.
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Numbing lubes can help but be cautious. Pain is your friend with anal play. Pain tells you that you need to slow down and relax. Pain tells you that you need to go to something smaller. Without pain, it's very easy to tear something that ultimately leads to days or weeks of pain instead of a minute or two of discomfort.

Littleton CO
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hi, ive been gifted with my first dp tonight. was thinking of the numbing lubes ive seen on the market. advise?

Bristol CT
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Glass dildos are very rigid and don't have any "give" to them. Try finding a soft, flexible dildo, and start small. Toy stores also sell anal training kits that have an array of butt plugs from small to large. And as everyone else has said, relax. Make sure your partner knows to take it slow and gentle until you get comfortable. But I would caution the advice to push out when inserting. If you are inexperienced with how to control your asshole (sounds dumb but it's serious), you could end up with a mess that neither of you will enjoy. Plus, pushing out is a good way to end up with hemorrhoids. All I can say is, good luck and enjoy yourself!

Butler PA
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Our first advice is...RELAX!!! Not only will your upset/disappointment continue to contribute to the issue but it appears you're doing this for the hubby more than you...wrong approach!!! If indeed you fantasize or imagine that this is going to be pleasurable to YOU (not the hubby) then your answer is still RELAX!!!

J & S

Fairfield PA
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In our experience the type of lube is less important than the relaxation. Your anus can open to accept a pretty large object, when relaxed. One technique is to activate the exit response by pushing out slightly rather than trying to let it open by itself. The anus naturally opens when you push out, as if to shit. Just make sure you don't push that hard, and have nothing to push out. :)

It also helps to start small, as with a finger, to get used to the feeling. The first reaction of being tense tends to close the sphincter. When you get over that tensing response, it will be easier.

Enosburg Falls VT
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As the wife we started with vasaline and a finger to help relax him, you may want to use a dildo made out of a softer material or "lady finger vibe", hubby as now gone to enjoying a strap on, but we have always found vasaline to be the best lube!

Mc Connellsburg PA
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TOPIC: new to anal