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so many bi guys, but no one wants to meet : Swingers Discussion 176305
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FORUMSThe Bi Sexual SwingerBi Malesso many bi guys, but no one wants to meet
TOPIC: so many bi guys, but no one wants to meet
Created by: funlyfriend
Original Starting post for this thread:
I'm in the Albany NY area. Lots of guys listed as bi or bi-curious, but every one is always so busy. do you find the same problem in your area? should we think these guys are just fakes?

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Frankly, we have decided just to attend the bi parties in our area, and see who we meet there. Still follow up encounters seem to be an issue though.

New Freedom PA
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judgmental assholes! what. here? Nahhhh can't be, you must be in the politics forum

Greencastle PA
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Dialog is going great and we might have, fingers crossed found a couple to meet up with that lives an hour away.

Chicago IL
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Aaron- just have an open discussion with your wife (though it seems you tried to do that). We have only been in this lifestyle a year and I am already fed up with judgmental assholes. Women are almost expected to be bi and men are expected to be straight. It's perfectly acceptable to some people to see a woman get banged by 10 guys in a night, but God forbid males kiss or do more..... smh

Whitehall PA
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aaron dont take this too wrong.... but barb sounds like a selfish bitch. she can have her cake and eat it but you cant ? WTF ? and im betting you lunch right now, she did more than kiss that girl if shes admitting to a kiss.. just sayin

sorry

Parsippany NJ
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So cheating is bad, I dealt with an unfaithful spouse, so I know first hand. So is being bi, a bi male is worse, in the swinging environment anyway... So cheating is out, the guilt from that is as bad as the depression from stifling your own natural desires.

What you need to do is have more open discussions about your relationship. I've been dealing with this in a non swinging group for support for a little over a year and I find swinging seems to be the better environment, as long as both partners are equally involved. It doesn't help that bi men are considered liars and cheaters by default. So my recommendation is to work through it honestly, do not expect suppression of your self is an option, and do not let your wife assume that is an option either.

There are support groups, both good and bad. Find those that are truly supportive of both you and your wife, and your marriage.

It an work.

Reisterstown MD
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I hear you loud and clear Rick. Been with the same woman for twenty years and I've allowed her to follow every dream and desire she has ever had. She told me that she kissed a woman and liked it but didn't want to cheat on me. The whole time I knew she was flirting and wanted to play with said female who was Bi and had had full relationships with women, I was still into letting her try it out if I could watch and be present. Years later she told me that she had kissed her and had never told me, yes that cheating. I didn't care because I had told her it was ok and while I was a little let down that I couldn't share that with her I was ok with it.

So then we get on the subject of my sexuality and I tell her I have some slight physical feelings for men, nothing crazy, kissing, touching. So then she tells me if I want to kiss a guy to go find a gay guy to kiss and get it over with. She then told me I wouldn't like it anyway so to forget about and besides I was married and should have thought of that before.

So I have two options the way I see it... Either I can keep it to myself and hope those feeling don't manifest in depression or worse. Or I can step outside my marriage and try to live with the quilt and a secret. Either way I'm fucked and not in a good way.

She has mentioned if we find someone in our vanilla life and it works out then it works out. Only problem is being a married bi man is tough, should I just walk up to random couples at the mall and hope I don't have to get in a fist fight with a homophobic douche.

#realtalkbro

Chicago IL
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Aaron, Same problems out here. Especially with the "cheating" aspect. I tried for years to get my wife interested in the lifestyle to no avail. I just gave up, but do I have to get a divorce from the woman I love in order to have a rewarding sex life? Very frustrating.

Prescott Vly AZ
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I changed my profile to bi and have had tons of messages. Most are couples with straight men too. No one I've really been attracted to, but it's nice to have interest.

As a new bi guy on here I see a lot of profiles that say no single men, which I fully understand and have already had some dealings will on here. But is a bi guy contacting someone the same as a single straight guy? I see a lot of profiles that say we want a bi guy and all their fantasies are MMF but my question is it ok to contact them? I don't want to be that bi-guy if you know what I mean.

Also the cheating element is tough. I've been hinting and down right pleading for my wife to let me play with a guy for a while now to no avail. There's no way I'm going to ruin a 20+ year marriage for some a little MM fun bit at the same time it's a bit maddening at times.

Chicago IL
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i hear you especial in sacramento calif! they all want a couple not a good looking single bi-guy! I am so horny for a nice cock to suck but cant find anyone to bit?

Citrus Heights CA
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TOPIC: so many bi guys, but no one wants to meet