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Is honesty really the best policy : Swingers Discussion 346401021
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FORUMSThe Bi Sexual SwingerBi MalesIs honesty really the best policy
TOPIC: Is honesty really the best policy
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I have an issue with MSM. (men who have sex with men)

This is the preferred medical label. There are many MSM who ID as straight. This describes the behavior not an identity.

My issue is simple. Statistics abound about MSM not using protection about 40% of the time. This puts that 40% at higher risk of HIV, Hep B, and others.

The thread on swallowing is interesting. MF Fellatio is a different animal from MM. MM is more aggressive, more likely to include deep throating. The absolute risk of getting HIV orally as a male is small.

Because my body is more open to exposure through intercourse, I prefer not to play with MSM. This may seem hypocritical because I'm a biF. It's not.

The type of sex women engage in is very unlikely to transmit HIV. I remember only one case. One lesbian was an injection drug user. She infected her partner.

BTW, I subscribe to the mantra of the gay male. ON me. Not in me.

Because of the perception of MSM as vectors of disease into the swinging community, they are shunned.

In the past, most lied. I am glad folks are honest. Eventually, there may be more acceptance of MSM. Don't hold your breath until then. The statistics will need to change for me to change my behavior.

Speaking honestly.

Mischief

Glen Burnie MD
 
 
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Curious, really, if there is that much anxiety about sex with someone else of any gender then I don't recommend swinging with a life partner. I have had much experience with it in the past--both good and bad. I saw two marriages and a relationship of mine destroyed by swinging because both partners did not have a clear understanding of their own needs--let alone the needs of their partner.

Also, let us not forget that it is not others that we are afraid of, its ourselves. We can only project our own truth onto others as it is the only one we know. If a man is afraid that he might get blown by a guy that is admittedly bi then what he might be afraid of is that he might like it. I mean, I hope we're all smart enough not to get into bed with someone that does not respond well to "no".

Shingle Springs CA
 
 
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AS We have stated previously we prefer the term hetero-flexible to bi. I think having it in your profile lets folks who are not interested know in advane and save themselves some time and lets those who are intertested also know in advnce. With those that are interested it is definately a plus. For those that are not again it saves thyem time.

Since we're not out to hop in the sack with the entire world we really figure we haven't missed a thing. We seek those special few we want to do and whom are interested in us.

We do get a lot of mail from "Str8" folka and we respect they are interested and still uncomfortable with the idea as well. I do know it took us a while to get comfortable with it as well however once we tried it we never looked back and are glad we did. It sure adds interesting dimensions to play time.

Jacksonville FL
 
 
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its true, I think you will see less responses with a bi handle, mostly because most men I think are less likely to invite you to play. Perhaps because it means that you have already played with other men and that leaves a bad taste in their mouths (all pun intended). Its not a homophobia I think that word is used much too often, I have no fear of gay men, I just have no desire to be one, or play with one the goes through both doors. There is still much stigmatisim over gay men anyway (and i know you say bi but its is ofter perceived as gay) sad but true. Or maybe most men are a little scared of having a bi man in their bed, because they maybe afraid that if the opportunity is there they my try it, and they don't want to, at least not openly

Sebastian FL
 
 
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I can hardly do better than Mark & Debbi's reply, John, but consider this: if a man likes the taste of tomatoes, does that make him a vegetarian? That's exactly what you're saying, you know.

I'm not sure how to define when someone is gay other than to say if they say they are then they, no doubt, are. I believe someone is gay if they are in or looking for a romantic emotional connection with someone of the same sex.

I know I'm not gay (something it took me years to understand because of thinking like yours) because I know that women are the reward for an otherwise difficult life and should be treated accordingly. I like sucking cock, John--A LOT! You're cock looks nice, John. Want me to suck it for you? I've never been fucked or fucked a guy but who knows what I might try.

But, here's the thing, John: To me, there is no better thing in the world than to make a woman scream in ecstacy. Whether it be under my tongue or from the slam of my cock. And when I look at my lover, who celebrates me as a man, cheers me when I succeed, encourages me when I doubt, and holds me when I'm in pain, I know I'm owned by woman as she is owned by man.

You don't like man 2 man contact, John? Nobody's going to deride you for that--at least no one that matters. Labeling people is a dangerous business--just ask Jesus Christ or Martin Luthur King. Let's try to be careful how we do it.

Shingle Springs CA
 
 
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Dave... In my oppinion, there is no such thing as a bi- male. Just PC new age lifestyle BS. Trying to appear modern and chic. So tolerent. If a male likes the taste of dick, he's gay. You are right about one thing. "bi" is definitely a couple repelent. Please respond. I would enjoy discussing further.

John

Douglassville PA
 
 
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Navy, any person who shuns you because you're bi is an ugly person. You're doing yourself a favor not sharing yourself with them.

Fair Oaks CA
 
 
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Mark, I think yours is a good suggestion and worth giving to the webmaster. I'm not sure if it will make people more open but it would be good to give more options. Personally, I list as bi-curious because I've only given head, which is great. Doesn't mean I won't though.

I must say, I read your profile and certifications as well as those you've been with and am jealous that out in your area there appear to be so many more folks comfortable with bisexuality and prepared to say so. The west coast needs more like you. Steve

Shingle Springs CA
 
 
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Honesty is the only way to be. If you are not honest with your partner and your lifestyle friends you are setting yourself up for a fall.

Jacksonville FL
 
 
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I agree with you I am the same way. I just wanted to put out the question and voice my opinion. Thanks

Dave

Saint Marys GA
 
 
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TOPIC: Is honesty really the best policy