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Double standard when it comes to bi guys in the lifestyle : Swingers Discussion 226523
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FORUMSThe Bi Sexual SwingerBi MalesDouble standard when it comes to bi guys in the lifestyle
TOPIC: Double standard when it comes to bi guys in the lifestyle
Created by: silksheets
Original Starting post for this thread:
It is pretty interesting how in this lifestyle bi males are looked at in a negative way and bi females are accepted and encouraged? We can tell you that 99% of the couples who contact us their profiles claims the male to be straight but the email to us says he is bi this is pretty sad that people feel they can not be honest and need to lie to be looked at in a positive way! So many people in this lifestyle claim they are open minded but refuse to even engage in email with a couple who have a bi male? Why do they think all bi males are disease ridden and bi females are looked at in a totally positive light?

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GOOD conversation people. Congrats. And yes, be patient. Meet and greets are certainly a good way. Also, take swing cruises. We swear by them. Two reasons: #1, there are bi meet and greets every day on the ship (or almost every day). #2, you meet thousands of great people wanting to play and no one is walking around with a label on their foreheads that says bi or straight. If you hit it off at the pool, dinner, dancing, etc. you hit it off. No need to debate labels or get fearful, etc. We've met so many great people and they don't ask first "hey, he's not bi is he?!:-)))" Sure we talk about who is into what but the ice has been broken, etc. and no one is afraid of some crap going on in their heads.

Hollywood FL
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That's what I was thinking, it's all people you prolly wouldn't want to meet anyway. I can play openly in group settings, but I consider my self to be pretty much straight. I used to list straight & elaborate about the openess in the profile text, but the hate mail and liar accusations started to really piss me off. Since listing bi, that has stopped, but so has most contacts, which is fine with me since we have zero interest in homophobes & bigots. Most truly bi guys say I'm not really bi, but none of them have been hateful or ugly about it. And the people we have met since I've been listing bi have been so much better in character.

Osterburg PA
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TandM, I think those folks are really doing you a favor. They are screening themselves out of the process and making I less difficult to avoid folks you probably wouldn't enjoy being with anyway.

Knightdale NC
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Its actually pretty funny looking at our block list, people we have never even talked to have blocked us. All because of a label.

Virginia Bch VA
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I totally agree. I have been in the lifestyle off and on for years. It's hard enough to be a single guy on the site but you will never get a response if you advertise your bi or bi-curious. I have actually been with couples who where bi with the right people and found out later.

Davis Park NY
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Patience my friend, you've only been here a month. We started back in 03, and it took us several months to meet our first. Try attending a meet & greet, or a party if you're ready to dive in.

Osterburg PA
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The situation is really disheartening. The wife and I are new to this and all we seem to get are couples that misread and think she is bi and I am straight, single guys that are bi but list as straight for reasons mentioned earlier, single guys cheating on their wives (big no no for us), and guys who want to be a bull while I watch (sorry, I can play straight but why message us if you just want to lay her and me to stay away? I don't mind sharing.) We have many fantasies and me being bi is just a small part of it. People don't seem to understand that being bi means I like women too. We have chatted with some straight couples that aren't interested in the bi thing and it is totally fine with us. We just wish people could look past the title and get to know us a bit.

Virginia Bch VA
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We are still relatively new to the lifestyle but one of the very first things we noticed were bi guys listed as straight. We asked some of them about it and the answer always was basically: "well, I want to list as bi but when I do no one contacts us." AND, surprisingly, when we then get together and mention bi possibilities a lot of people are find with it or are also into it!" So, instead of dealing with the prejudice (let's face it, they can't fix someone else's prejudice), they list as straight. We decided we couldn't do that but would TRY to explain in our profile that a bi guy is not some pervert who is going to force bi activity on a straight guy. Why in the world would people think they would???

Hollywood FL
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Have you been gone that long? I thought I hadn't seen that cute bubble butt in a while.

Greencastle PA
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Jesus Christ….

been gone a year or two and we're still fumbling over the same issues???

No offense to those newly to the idea of sucking some cock, thought things might have changed a little, no?

Yes, I have an opinion!

Littleton CO
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TOPIC: Double standard when it comes to bi guys in the lifestyle