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Soft Swap : Swingers Discussion 58016
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TOPIC: Soft Swap
Created by: lindave
Original Starting post for this thread:
Exactly what is a soft swap? How much sexual activity is allowed?

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We agree with Annie. We love the total experience watching, being watched, helping! being helped! My, did it just get warm in here??? LOL

And we also agree on another point. You ARE fine as you are. Indeed M'Lady!

Bethpage TN
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Vive la difference! And yes, I think you're mighty fine! :-)

Jim

South Riding VA
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Annie, you make an important point - that if you weren't bi, you're not sure you would be soft swap.

That brings up another point too, that has been discussed at length in Forum - the Same Room vs Separate Room concepts.

Since Mrs. Valovers is totally straight, there is no NEED to be in the same room, since same gender sex play isn't on the menu.

Since we're both more DOERS than VOYEURS, same room holds no special appeal for us, and it detracts from her enjoyment because she is too distracted.

So if you're in SEPARATE rooms, full swap is almost a foregone conclusion.

We forget how much difference it makes that Mrs. Valovers is straight.

Anyway, we also get to satisfy any voyeuristic tendencies when at parties or clubs, since it's not very often in such scenarios that a couple could have a room to themselves. In fact, at parties & clubs it almost detracts NOT to have a group grope going on around you.

Jim

South Riding VA
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We're starting to understand. Thanks for helping.

Although we have been full swap since we started swinging a long time ago, we too have found that it's the flirting and kissiing and feeling and seduction and the "getting there" that's the most fun part of swinging. Intercourse itself rarely equals and never exceeds the quality we have just with each other.

And at a party, we enjoy all the "preliminaries" even if we don't end up fucking everybody we enjoy preliminaries with. So I think we can well understand the soft swap philosophies.

But sometimes we really wanna fuck! :-)

Jim

South Riding VA
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Annie, we are with you. And you are sounding BETTER the badder you get! LOL

Bon Appetite!

Bethpage TN
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Hmmmmmmmm, sounds like GREAT Annie to us!

Bethpage TN
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Well Jim, we are a Long Term Soft Swap ONLY Couple (hmmmm 12 years of playing). We go with the theory of the least common denominator. We have decided to maintain intercourse for just each other as we were virgins when we married and have only had intercourse with each other. We are willing to do other things (oral, toys, etc) depending on attractions, but are usually interested in watching and ladies' play. That seems to be the case with most other soft swap couples. Two of the couples we have been with (and there haven't been that many) were willing to do ANYTHING, but were accepting of our limitations. What can we say, it works for us. And we always have the right to decide to move further along the continuum if we discuss it and choose to. To each their own indeed!

Bethpage TN
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It seems to us that soft swap is usually a transient stage that either leads people to move on to full swap or decide swinging isn't for them. It's sort of a "getting your toes in the water" stage to see if you feel like swimming or staying out of the water.

It's not always so, though. Some couples seem to be very comfortable STAYING as soft swap. It sure beats us, though, how they can keep from going the rest of the way. It's sort of like self torture! LOL

We would be interested in hearing from any long-term soft swap couples about what makes it work for them and why they never moved on to full swap. It seems like sooner or later you would run into a couple that makes you crave penetration!

Jim

South Riding VA
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Just posted my opinion. I actually answered the soft swap question that was posted, then got off topic with others comments. I do feel to each their own and preference is very important. Just gave my opinion like everyone else.!! I do like to throw a little humor in posts now and again and forget that since others dont know me they dont know when I am being humorous..

Spring TX
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Gee, SweetJeez, so much for "It's all about preference" and everyone doing their own thing?

If you are so down on SoftSwap why are you posting here?

Bethpage TN
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TOPIC: Soft Swap