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FORUMS Successful Swinging First Contact So you see a hot couple at a club, now what
TOPIC: So you see a hot couple at a club, now what
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I love this thread, tbh. My husband and I have talked about going to a club, but I have personally been way too nervous, and afraid that my introverted nature would have me sitting at a table watching the goings ons ... in short, an expensive and uneventful night. I think a lot of the suggestions are good, though. When we work up the courage, I know we'll be a lot more informed now!

Baltimore MD
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My GF is very outgoing and usually knows everyone by the end of the night. She typically just starts with a "love your dress" "like your tie" or "nice boobs". On a recent triip to vegas she took to passing out our number to nearly everyone we even had a casual conversation with saying we will be here all week, give us a call if you want to go do something. No one was ever offended and we had people to hang out with nearly every night, made good freinds and even made really good friends with one couple.

Round Rock TX
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Shy or outgoing... It's your time and if you're like us with very limited time to meet and play with others, you need to make the most of your time! We used to frequent couples clubs until about 27 months ago when we learned there is little difference in meeting couples playing slots in a casino or meeting couples in a couples club. Everyone wants to have a good time. When you can find something you like about a person you're interested in meeting, introduce yourself and comment on what you like about them. We meet nice people who have become very close friends of ours in casino's, resteraunts, grocery stores, strip clubs, and airports! By finding something we like in a person or couple and then taking the time to comment on it, we have found this approach to be a great ice breaker. If they're not into the lifestyle and tell you so during your conversation, they usually tell you in a very polite way. We hope this helps!

Las Vegas NV
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our club tries to have a few activities during the night where, as long as you participate, you will meet some new people in a non threatening way and no one has to make the first move. Some clubs use different colored straws to state how you play. That is always fun and we just take every color so not to miss anyone.

Fort Collins CO
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I've been lucky to have visited a number of clubs over the years I've enjoyed the lifestyle (including several in Europe). A couple (of otherwise inferior quality, unfortunately) used to have a system similar to the "playing card" one described below - couple seeking sm, sw, other couple, etc. Seemed to work fairly well, I think -- certainly helped me when I was playing as a sm. On the other hand, a large number of folk in the lifestyle are up for a variety of action, depending on the moment, etc., so the candor afforded by the club atmosphere seems to be the best feature, ultimately.

FWIW ...

Peter

Olmsted Falls OH
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thn this is a good idea. The thing is, it changes with your mood so its hard to set a label so to speak on yourself. We have gone to parties with the intention of playing and found no one we had chemistry so just chilled and mingled...and have gone with no intention of playing and ended up nekkid. I like the idea of soft, moderate and full better. A color perhaps. That way it doesn't say if they are playing or not, it just tells you when they do this is what they usually like to do. Shell


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We have talked about this qutie a bit and thought it might be cool if there were a sticker, temporary tattoo, or other thing we could wear that might hint that we were just looking to talk tonight or were definately looking to get nekid with a couple tonight- you know something that would make it easier once your're in a club.

Maybe it's something as simple as a playing card symbol- a heart might mean you just want to chat, a diamond might mean you're looking for another couple to get nekid with, a a club might mean you're looking for a threesome, and so on.

What do you think?

Bensalem PA
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Well honestly we don't go to clubs much anymore but we do go to parties and meet and greets...same concept albeit just a quieter space. We look for things that interest us as in an interesting or beautiful tat, shoes or an outfit I like, or simply someone who is very good looking. Its nothing for Jay to walk up to a lady and say "I just want to tell you that you are a gorgeous woman". Then like others said we kind of do our own thing. And NOTHING is as inviting as a smile. Smiles are just inviting and warming. I will just walk up and say "hey, how are you I'm Shelly". Usually you get a look of relief that someone has been friendly to them. When we are on the dance floor we are notorious for grabbing anyone and everyone haha, we don't know them from Adam or Eve but who cares, right? We are all there to have fun. When you are there partying and having a blast people are attracted to that. Shell


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Stop by the table and ask them if they would like to dance as we are on the way to the dance floor. If they say no thanks, we are on our way to dance anyway. . but I have never been confused for being shy or subtle ...LOL.

Spring TX
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My wife and I are at odds when it comes to approaching couples at clubs... She is introverted and would just as soon sit back and be approached by another couple... My philosphy is that we will meet a couple more of our choosing if we approach who we are interested in rather than the other way... I am usually the life of the party and no many of the couples and help other couples hook-up with people that they might connect well with... Since we feel that when we go to clubs it is like a "swinger safari" we usually only go to a club to meet another couple... We meet new couples through this couple and sort of network this way kinda through referrals... I don't mind at all if couples aren't interested in playing... If someone says no it reflects nothing upon you as a person or your sexual appeal... I usually just think in my mind, "Oh, the guy must be into gay sex or something." Just a thought to keep me from taking things personal and staying upbeat... I will walk up to any new face that I don't know and just say "We just wanted to come over and introduce ourselves." Every couple I have done that with has been flattered to be noticed.... In fact I have found that we have actually been able to play with "newer couples" that might be out of our league because we were willing to break the ice and show them how to get started... It is basically the art of small talk... We will throw out softball questions like so "Whose idea was it to come here tonight?" They couple usually laughs and says "of course his." But some say "hers" and that tells you a lot about them already... The key is to not be too clingy and keep entering and leaving conversations and maybe after 3 casual approaches saying "It's kinda loud in here maye we could talk a bit more over there..." And then there is the transition from talking into playing which I feel we do quite well... We are a full swap couple and 90% of the time we use the massage transition... I will say something casual like "Are you up for a massage?" And my wife quickly chimes in with "Oh he is amazing..." It is much easier to take a small step... It is easier to ask the question and easier from them to say yes... Now this is definetly after we have talked about what we are into and not into and casually address the "groundrules" for the encounter.... Anyway that is what we do and have had a ton of fun...

Viera FL
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TOPIC: So you see a hot couple at a club, now what