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Don't take Not Interested Gracefully : Swingers Discussion 628241011
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TOPIC: Don't take Not Interested Gracefully
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TaranisofGaul- there's a saying that comes to mind after reading your latest post here:

Never play leap frog with a unicorn.

Brooklyn Park MN
 
 
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One of my favorite authors used to opine that we live in the age of the rude person and more truthful words have never been spoken.

Personally, I have no problem with an email saying "Thanks but not interested" or a polite decline.

People who don't respond are rude. But there are worse examples out there..... Such as the people who arrange a meet and pull a no-show.... And there are worse than that....

For example the 'lady' (and I use that term loosely) who arranged a date last Friday at the bookstore in the mall 90 miles away from here. I showed up on time and she was two hours late, of course. She called and asked me to wait, so I did, being a bibliophile I can happily spend many hours in a bookstore. To make a long story short, when she did show up she was giving off all sorts of negative signals, such as no eye contact, fiddling with the cell phone welded to her hand, etc... I was hoping she would just say, "Look, I changed my mind, your not my type,...etc" and just ease herself off the hook gracefully. After all, this was an intelligent, sophisticated urban lady , albeit she was closer to 50 than the 41 she claimed on her profile. Instead she pulls one of the oldest scams in the book and asks me to meet her at a particular restaurant downtown. SO I go there knowing she won't show up. But because I did like her and did respect her intellect, from when we chatted, I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt. I waited a half hour and called. NO answer. I waited another half hour and texted. No answer. As we are on other forums and such, I waited another hour and called before I left, informing her that I would not have felt insulted or offended had she just told me at the mall she wasn't interested, but that pulling such a juvenile stunt as ditching me and blowing me off as she had done should have been beneath a woman of her years. There are degrees of rudeness. At the top would be argumentative assholes or people too stuck on themselves to be polite or take a 'no' in stride. The lowest on the list however are the people who knowingly waste your time.

Logan WV
 
 
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Hi,

Really sorry to read about your experience. Most people on this site are respectful and responsible. The worst I have experienced is the "Read But Not Replied".. I suggest being firm and polite and simply resending your "Thanks, But No Thanks" e-mail to all replies is a better strategy.

Chicago IL
 
 
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We had a similar incident with a single male, he had chatted w my husband and was told he would have me look at his profile (well we were busy) and every day we were getting this offline im or email HAS SHE LOOKED YET, then I was on one night and he was very rude and freaky and I removed him immediately from im and then blocked him on sls and he kept emailing and im us and then we had to report him as spam to stop the rude insults. I guess your going to meet people like that, and you just have to trust your instincts.

Fort Morgan CO
 
 
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Witty helps.

Rochester NY
 
 
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Yea, it happens on occasion. We have had some nasty notes sent back to us when we told someone we weren't interested. All they did was prove out point that we were not a match.

Carrie

Corpus Christi TX
 
 
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Welcome to the forums spamatdan.

Rochester NY
 
 
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I don't think there is a good way of saying not interested, some people are just not going to take it well. But the good thing is you did not meet the couple to find out later all the drama they would cause.

But over all it can be distrubing when some people don't take rejection very well. We have had a couple bad experiences the we blocked both couples.

Lansing MI
 
 
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Chemistry is not easily defined, especially when it comes to these matters. Who cares why? Is making assumptions as for the reason you were 'rejected' going to make you feel better?

If someone turns us down based on one or more of our pics, our profile, our forum postings, our email, the cycles of the moon or any other reason, has no bearing on our lives. We had a couple write us, we read their profile and we were outside their stated age range but thought, oh well we'll respond and see. They turned us down after asking for a pic and stated that we were "much too old" for them. LOL WTF? You wrote us ya ninnies. Obviously we didn't float their boat. Who cares? We wished them well and moved on, ta-da!

My guess is people that don't take a 'no thanks' gracefully are a contributing factor in some members not replying to mail.

Corvallis OR
 
 
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"I suspect that anyone who would say 'no chemistry' from just looking at your pics, without even chatting with you, is simply saying that you're not enough of a hardbody for them."

Or it could be that she is not plump enough for them.

Rochester NY
 
 
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TOPIC: Don't take Not Interested Gracefully