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And THIS is why people don't respond to emails : Swingers Discussion 1438161067
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TOPIC: And THIS is why people don't respond to emails
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We were simply making a suggestion that a good percentage of ppl on SLS appear to have honesty issues in re the "flakes and fakes". I can't imagine any equitable way that one might (or even should) separate one from the other and I really don't want to go there...great way to start a fight! lol Suffice it to say that there are too many people with profiles that provide skewed representations, and that too many ppl on SLS are less than totally honest about themselves. IMHO, of course, and subject to change without notice. (grin)

JnD


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I used to use the word "fake" a lot.

Thats a broad word in this situation.

I think the problem is that people need to be more honest in their profile.

If they are just on here for dirty chat or to fantasize online.....They should make that clear.

If they are "just feeling things out" and are a little shy or unsure about proceeding.......They should say that too.

I think those 2 categories contribute most of the "fakes"

But they are only fakes because they represent themselves as real "ready to go" swingers when really theyre not.

If they would just be honest in conversation, it would be much easier.

Mount Juliet TN
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Well personally you have to expect that everyone doesn't always play by the rules, and in their case stupidity overrides everything else. Everyone in the group is not like them, so take it with a grain of salt, let let it go. Friends an playmates are forever, so have fun.

Charlez


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I don't know that a follow-up is necessarily a bad idea... After all, some folks get inundated with e-mail around here and one could get lost in the shuffle. On the other hand, sending two or three follow-up messages is a bit excessive (again, that's just my opinion). I look in the sent file to see if they've read the earlier messages. If they have and still chosen not to reply, then I figure it's their loss, not ours.

I also have to agree with the theory about if they were to clear out the flakes and fakes there'd be damned nearly nobody left around here. Traffic and a user base are a web site's life blood, so doing that sort of thing would be pretty bad for business. ;)

Colorado Springs CO
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NJ ... A non-response IS a response ... they're saying they're not interested or sociable enough to spend a few minutes composing a polite and thoughtful note expressing their appreciation for your interest. Pack it in and move on.

I'd imagine (this is just IMHO, now) that, were the SLS administrators to somehow find and delete all of the game players, cheaters, and wannabees, the membership here would be Decimated. The chances are that Most of the people that you've messaged weren't really swingers anyway...they were more likely playing headgames, or cheating, curious but not serious, or looking for someone to "persuade" their partner. Even if they were serious, would you really want to hook up with someone who would blow you off with so little civility? Just limit yourself to a single expression of interest and move on, leaving the ball in Their court.

JnD


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3 emails is excessive.

No response is also a response.

Personally I prefer that people not respond if they are not interested.

But, I dont like rejection...haha....So a non-response is just fine with me

Mount Juliet TN
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NJ, you send them THREE "courteous anyone home emails?" I say send one and if they don't respond...that is a response. Sending more than that just looks desperate in my opinion...which may not be worth much lol

Good luck!

K

Oklahoma City OK
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We had a similar experience that came in the form of an IM on SLS. The guy was an ass and obviously pretty desparate to find some booty. He was one of these "let's fuck right now" types. Pretty clear he didn't bother to read our profile.

We've turned down several people since then without a negative response. I would like to think your experience is an isolated one and I sure hope you don't use it as an excuse to not return emails. Most here are good people who deserve your response.

Charleston WV
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Yeah, that happens. Probably 90% of the cpls that we msg will just ignore it, and the other 10% will respond. When we do respond with a "no thanks" we try to do so in a positive manner and wish them well in their efforts. I think that's something that some people just never learned, including how to handle rejection gracefully. Nothing you can do about 'em. And, honestly, if they'd respond like that don't they just confirm the wisdom of your earlier decision to not pursue an acquaintance?

JnD


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Got an email from a couple recently that quite frankly hadn't really read our profile and were clearly not what we are looking for. We sent them a pretty standard reply basically saying thanks for the email but we're not interested. Got a nastygram back from them basically telling us what losers we are and how after looking at our profile again they're not really interested in us either. We try to reply to every email we get, but this kind of thing is SUCH a turn off that I really can understand why people take the position that no response is really it's own form of response.

C&C

Cranberry Township PA
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TOPIC: And THIS is why people don't respond to emails