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What is wrong with Married men swinging alone : Swingers Discussion 707531072
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TOPIC: What is wrong with Married men swinging alone
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Hi, WOW!! Some of you guys get pretty intense. I do not attemp to mix religion and sex. In 6 days we will have made it to 31 years being married and selectively "swinging" over 28. We are more secure in our relationship than ever. We were in love almost 32 years ago so I guess you would have to say we are MORE in love now and I didnt think that possible. I am the female and I pick who I think I would like us to play with. The one "rule", if you will, between us is that if either of us dislikes something that is the end of it. At one time I would have say there was somthing wrong with anyone attached swinging alone but now I think it depends on the situation. I had gotten sick that led to an operation. I was "out' for a pretty long time and actually set it up so my husband could play two times. I know what a man needs and after the fact really wanted him to say how great it was. He said it was ok but I wasnt there so never wanted to do it again. We have had 3 ladies live with us(one for 4 years) and he would NEVER touch them sexually if I wasnt there. The main reason I normally choose NOT to get involved with an attached person is simple and not based on ethics, morality, or religion. I do not want to be involved in the baggage as it is too complicated. I LOVE SLS, my husband, and swinging. I have many friends and family that know we swing(concerning the post about telling) but some I choose not to tell and I feel that is my right. If someone finds out and didnt like it they could live with it--or without me. We are soul and life mates and as long as we are happy that is what is important. Some do this to have fun but we like to make rocking chair memories. I hope you guys can have half as much fun as we have. Be cool, be safe, be good to each other, and have a blast.

Lake Charles LA
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RK, You are right in the sense that there is a double standard with certain couples. Yes, some couples are so desperate for a unicorn that they don't care if she has 3 boobs and blue hair lol. Well, thats over dramatic but you know what I mean. They have tunnel vision on what they want and thats it. However, I have found that most couples feel the exact same way about cheating wives as they do about cheating husbands. Now, I know that there are spouses who DO play with the complete consent of their husband or wife. However, I know that unless we have met you as a couple at a meet and greet or house party and know that we know that your wife is cool we probably won't play with you. Just being honest. I just don't have time to investigate. And I do not need an angry or crying wife to be calling me. Shell

San Marcos TX
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From Wikipedia: Although the definition of "adultery" differs in nearly every legal system, the common theme is sexual relations outside of marriage, in one form or another.

For example, New York defines an adulterer as a person who "engages in sexual intercourse with another person at a time when he has a living spouse, or the other person has a living spouse."North Carolina defines adultery as when any man and woman "lewdly and lasciviously associate, bed and cohabit together. "Minnesota defines adultery as: "when a married woman has sexual intercourse with a man other than her husband, whether married or not, both are guilty of adultery".

Adultery was known in earlier times by the legalistic term "criminal conversation" (another term, alienation of affection, is used when one spouse deserts the other for a third person). The term originates not from adult, which is from Latin a-dolescere, to grow up, mature, a combination of a, "to", dolere, "work", and the processing combound sc), but from the Latin ad-ulterare (to commit adultery, adulterate/falsify, a combination of ad, "at", and ulter, "above", "beyond", "opposite", meaning "on the other side of the bond of marriage").

Pismo Beach CA
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P and I don't agree on this. I don't feel comfortable about having a married man over for mfm if his wife doesn't know. She feels that if a man is cheating on his wife it's THEIR problem, not ours.

What do we do when we disagree about anything in swinging? As always, the one least comfortable gets to exercise veto power.

Jim

South Riding VA
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Original Starting post questions: What is wrong with married men swinging alone? Nothing at all if the married couple are in agreement to do so.

Why do women not give us a chance? Same reason they make their choices on swinging with certain couples of solo females, it is a matter of choices based on their values and beliefs.

I happen to be one of those married males swinging solo, with wife's blessings. Been together over 30 years and will be till death. Have discussed issue multiple times over several years and are convertible with choice we have made together. key to any type swinging as couple or solo is honesty, and respect of others choices.

Lincoln AL
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Scotty...you flirting wit ME? (first time! )

I really think there has to be a LOT of communication for this to be a "comfortable" thing to do, but I still don't want to be with a deceptive married man. I don't want to be with anyone deceptive, so that rules out several kinds of people...the ones w/ fake pics, the ones with phoney profiles, the marrieds who are posing as singles, the singles who are posings as couples...and the list goes on.

Will I rescend that someday? I don't know. For now, there are plenty of fun, sexy, open and honest singles an couples, so we don't have to really worry about lack of partners.

Borrow away, what do you have for collateral? Gina

San Antonio TX
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shell,

I'd play wiht you however you want to.

Lake Worth FL
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I agree completely with bicpl; if the wife in a couple knows the husband is playing with another woman and has given her consent (and vice versa of course) I see absolutely nothing wrong with it. As I have said before, Jay and I are considering this. Although we are still in communication and discussion about this the one thing we have both insisted on is that the other knows who we are with and have given complete consent; if one of us does not like the potential partner we say no and there are no arguments, no questions asked. I know that we have found that most people do not play with couples that play alone unless they already know them; this is because you simply don't have the time to investigate and make sure that this is really someone playing with their spouses consent and not a cheating husband or wife. Shell

San Marcos TX
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Gina,

I don't want to make you mine, I just want to borrow you for 2 or 3 hrs.

Lake Worth FL
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Adultery is defined as extramarital sex...swinging is within the marriage, and you are not coveting the other person's mate (wanting them to be your own, for example and having the person's mate knocked off, as did King David to get Bathsheba).

Frankly, anyone can justify anything they feel they are doing "wrong." We don't think we're doing anything wrong. If we felt we were, then we wouldn't do it, as it would be hurtful, not only to others, but to ourselves.

It's what your intentions are, not what your deed are, that are of importance in this area. My spirituality is VERY personal and private and it corresponds nicely with my sexuality...they're all about myself as a loving, giving person. I am at my most mentally, emotionally and physically pure when I am having sex.

Those may be seen as mystical, confusing, contradictory statements, but I do know myself well enough to "know what I'm talking about" in reference. Gina

San Antonio TX
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TOPIC: What is wrong with Married men swinging alone