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Instant messages - why do they bother : Swingers Discussion 69368
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TOPIC: Instant messages - why do they bother
Created by: playfulbinight
Original Starting post for this thread:
We don't mind instant messages - even fun to get them sometimes and a nice way to meet with people on here. But it seems strange that somebody would go through the trouble of messaging us and then have absolutely nothing to say - "hi" "hello - how are you" "good - and you?" "fine" "can you open your pics for me?" after seeing their pics are closed still or none there to begin with "can you tell me a little about yourself first to see if we have any reason to continue here" "no need to be rude "

LOL- seems it always goes the same way. Just wish if people wanted to message they would have something to say , preferably read our profile first, and not be accusing us of being rude if neither of those apply....

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We leave it on and have had fun with it in both chat and video mode. We love it when people we like or have been with contact us and make it hell on those that have nothing to say. It is just one more tool to judge compatibility. Emails can be thought out and edited but on the fly banter gives U insight into the individual or couple. As for single guys and cheating husbands we just use the block option. We're here to meet people so we use the tools available to reach that end.

San Diego CA
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Yeah, its pretty rare that we IM on sls. Usually its a single male that wants to IM, and then when we do start talking they will say something dumb like "nice tits". LOL. Shell


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We keep sls IM OFF to protect the stoopid from IM'ing us. If they are friends they have our yahoo messenger.

Destin FL
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Both Jay and I use IM although on Yahoo more than on sls. We are both talkative (although we have removed my IM addy from the profile because I was being hit constantly lol) and do enjoy it. My only thing is if you are shy or don't like talking why invite me to talk? LOL. I have people initiate IM, I answer and say hello, and they are like "hi"....dead air....how are you....dead air.....lol. Then just silence. Shelly


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I am married to a technaphobe. So if someone is online it is going to be me. To make matters worse she doesn't type because of a failed carpal tunnel surgery.

One thing about the IM is that many people can't figure out how to get it to work. The pop-up blocker prevents it from working and some people just freak when they get the request. I like chatting so I like using it.

Chandler AZ
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We get a lot from single guys that are creepy or inappropriate. But as a couple we work wacky schedules so usually its one of us speaking (for both) We have people that refuse to talk to us alone. We dont have anything to hide from one another, we save the post if its worth the read. We block the morons who just want to get to the private pics. He works nights and I im him while hes at work, so we share whats going on. We have talked to married men who have done the same things mentioned below, we just tell them thanks but we aren't interested. We personally enjoy chatting with couples and its given us a chance to break the ice and get to know each other better.

Fort Morgan CO
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Hi Seek. It happened to us again a couple of days ago. The male half of a "couple" sent us an e-mail wondering if we'd be into a 3 some with him alone. So I responded, why would you ask that, you have a "couples" profile? He answered, oh my ex doesn't play anymore,lol. Normally we would have brushed it off, but he was in our zip code.Mick copied and pasted his e-mail in a report to admin tho, and his profile was changed to a "single guy" the next day,lol. I'm not sure how easy it is to copy and paste an im though.

Reno NV
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Dancing ... and I apologise if I mis-read your posting. You may well be right about the M half of cpls doing most of the IM'ing.


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Jack, I certainly didn't intend to suggest in any way that every time we're contacted by the male half of a couple, that it results in an offer to cheat. I'm sorry if it came across that way, however it happens often enough to bear mentioning. My real point, is that in our experience anyway, more often than not, it's the male that makes contact with us. I'm not saying that that's either a positive or a negative, just that it strikes me a little odd is all. Like I said, its neither pro or con, but in our case, I'm online more often than hubby, and it suggests only that we may be unusual in that respect, and perhaps more couples profiles are tended to by the guys.

Reno NV
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Dancing . . . your response seems to indicate that all M's who IM are cheaters. I'd be the last to criticize there, as everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but you seem to be using a pretty broad brush. I've been known to IM on occasion when someone appears to have a particularly nice profile. It's a good way to short-cut the interminable e-mail delays and establish some rapport. Even though I've built and networked a PC for my wife to use while I'm online, so we can Both chat at the same time, she refuses to use it because she's very sensitive about her slow typing. She's had people disconnect on her, assuming that she's gone, when she's just very slow on the keyboard, and now she won't even sit down to it.

IM's can be irritating, but so can email from clueless ppl who don't bother to read a profile first. As far as we're concerned, it's just another means of getting acquainted that works a bit more quickly than Email and allows a bit more interaction. :-)

JnD


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TOPIC: Instant messages - why do they bother