I Give up!: Swingers Discussion 1310761021

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I Give up!: Swingers Discussion 1310761021

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TOPIC: I Give up!

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User Details are only visible to members.	Gunny...boy, have we been in your shoes, and for the same reasons too! I was up for deployment and wanted her to have some outlet with friends while I was there. We ended up just giving up the idea until I got back and we could handle things together. On the flip side, once we did get things flying straight/level, we've met many wonderful people. We've been in the LS for about 17yrs and wouldn't change a thing. However, it does take a thick skin sometimes with some peoples behavior. The LS just naturally seems to attract cheaters, horny (& clueless) single M's, and assorted other jokes along with the real people. It just takes time and experience to sort the wheat from the chaff. You might want to consider holding off 'til your return and then doing some mutual reconnaissance at your own comfort levels. There really are 'for real'/nice people in the LS and on SLS, they just keep a low profile amidst all of the jokers. Just a suggestion, though. JnD
Fairview Heights IL			Username hidden (634 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	This online swing thing takes alot of patients... dont let it get to you. simply say "Fuck Em" and move on. Theres alot of assholes out there.
Bronx NY			Username hidden (89 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	WrGunny; Been there & done that when I had an unaccompanied remote assignment to Korea. We ended up joining two very different local area swingers clubs where we met some very nice people. One of the more difficult things to learn is what we call 'expectation management'. If you approach the lifestyle with high expectations, you'll open yourself to disappointment. If you approach with low/no expectations beyond a pleasant time out, making new acquaintances (who might become friends), and mutually expanding your horizons a bit, it's a lot easier. Regrettably, just as in the vanilla world, there can be a significant portion of 'jerks', including both singles and couples. If they're jerks before they started swinging, they're probably going to continue being jerks as swingers. Nothing you can do about it except move on to someone more to your taste. Enjoy the time that you have together, get out together and meet others, let them know that you're interested (if you are), and let things unfold naturally. Good things take time to grow. Only bad stuff happens quickly. :) JnD
Fairview Heights IL			Username hidden (634 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	You just have to wade through the bullshit, keep your sense of humor and perservere. Do that, and eventually things will go your way." Agreed! I would like to add as well.....do not make fucking your goal. What I mean when I say this is, we see SO MANY couples who see playing with others as their only guage as to whether or not the evening was a "success"...if they didn't fuck strange they have a sad face and feel bad. This in my opinion will only lead to you being frustrated quickly. Your first priority, your only priority really, should be to have fun. I know we preach this over and over but its true. Learn from me. People who have been here for awhile can attest to the fact that when we started I would bitch and moan about this issue, we went to a house party and nothing happened, we went to the club and nothing happened....as if all of the dancing and drinking and laughing were moot since I didn't fuck strange cock. Now, we go to a party. Jay may get some strange, I may choose not to. Its not an issue, its not a numbers game or competition. Then I may get some strange and he does not. Tonight we are going to 6th in Austin just to party and dance. I promise you. If you start having FUN and thats what you go for...people will see this. People who are relaxing and just enjoying life are contagious. You will find that people will be attracted to THAT much more than the lingerie you are wearing. Best of luck to you!
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23661 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	hanuman, its the same for couples. We call it feast or famine. Some weeks you get many emails a day....then some not so much. Its the same for us all to some degree I think.
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23661 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	If you continue to allow yourself to take things so personally you are very quickly going to get frustrated and will not enjoy all that the lifestyle has to offer. Yes, sometimes people are rude, even self absorbed. But that extends to all areas of society I am afraid so it is something one must deal with. Best of luck to you though.
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23661 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	You have hit the nail right on the head. Too many rude, self absorbed people here.
Lock Haven PA			Username hidden (40 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	You have hit the nail right on the head. We have been looking for friends for several years with no luck. Most of the people on here are so ,(can't come up with the correct word), but it frustrates the hell out of us. Thanks for serving our country.
Lock Haven PA			Username hidden (40 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	wrg, you must realize that these forums are compromised of people who live all over the country (all over the world occasionally) and have different views and opinions. We are here to share those different opinions. Yeah, it can get heated and sometimes bitchy and nasty...but these are things that happen in families every day I think. Like Rings said, you can never EVER take things personally. I think that goes for the entire lifestyle in general, if you take things personally you will quickly be frustrated.
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23661 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	you are doing nothing wrong. There are just alot of fakers on SLS, as I am sure as on any other site too. The responses you are receiving, although not nice, should not be taken personally. People are going to response how they want and changing your profile to reflect other's negativity you would be modifying your profile non-stop In my opinion I would not cater my profile to address people's negative responses to you.
Howell MI			Username hidden (1615 post)

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TOPIC: I Give up!