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what are we doing wrong : Swingers Discussion 71479
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TOPIC: what are we doing wrong
Created by: tangyspecial
Original Starting post for this thread:
We are about to give up completely because all of the offers we have gotten are from people who apparently didn't read our profile or single men. We haven't had anyone mail us that fits what we want (and we aren't that picky) or even return our mails when we did the searching. We have only been members for a month or so, but I would think we would have gotten atleast one connection out of this by now. What are we doing wrong?

The Wifey

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Just some observations, if you don't mind: When you use "the wife" or "wifey" sometimes that demeans your identity. Most profiles will simple state "she" or "he."

Probably a little too much info on your kids (the number, the homeschooling....people want to read more about YOU). It's very good to know that your kids are a priority, and that will make others with kids understand your situation so that you can have discretion, also for meeting purposes. A lot of people in the lifestyle have to work around their kids, and I think they also look for others who can relate to that.

Last but not least, I am from Ohio, lived there for most of my life, and Ohioans are looking for fun, but are slower at coming out of their shells, for some reason. Not that I've lived everywhere, just an observance and I'm not the only one to state this. It may take you a bit longer to actually find a compatable couple to meet and to play with, but I think once you do, you'll be very satisfied.

Your pictures are great. If I'd change anything about your profile, I'd add a little more that tells people who YOU are, more of your own interests and fantasies.

Thanks for reading.

San Antonio TX
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tangy,

First, welcome to the forums. They can be both entertaining and informative as well as annoying, but new, active posters like yourselves always help keep them from getting stale.

To your question: several times we have seen comments that indicate the ratio of emails sent to getting to an actual meet (not necessarily play, just a face to face) is about 20 to 1. Depending on where you live, it may be even higher than that. We have been here a year, and frankly if it were not for the fact that we decided to start going to clubs, we might have given up by now. Chalk it up to the internet. If you can find a club that is well-recommended in your area, we suggest going. The huge advantage is that everyone who is there is past the point of chickening out. Swinging requires not only patience, but a willingness to try something new with a realization that when it is over, you may conclude that it is something you don't want to do again.

Mukilteo WA
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Actually yes. i said aw with like 4 w's. Didn't even think about that. Thanks! :)

Toledo OH
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"Hmmm... I just tried to reply and it said I used words that weren't allowed. Can't imagine what those words could have been... "

Did you have 3 w's in a row or a dot followed by the word com?

Rochester NY
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Hmmm... I just tried to reply and it said I used words that weren't allowed. Can't imagine what those words could have been...

I was trying to say that we would definitely be interested in meeting you guys for drinks and be able to chat with the wife a bit since we missed our chance new years. We met a few cool people there, but the distance is indeed a problem, though not a very big one in our eyes. We are just having problems finding people near us that will even respond to emails even if they aren't interested. Very disheartening to say the least.

Toledo OH
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Nothing wrong, you are both fun people to meet in RL. I know if we had been closer to you, we would already have at least met for drinks (or offered to)

We were shocked at how quickly we met fun people, but the time span seems to vary greatly for everyone. Next time you see us at an event yell and we will intro you to everyone we know.

Covington KY
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I realized that my original post came off harsher than I meant.

To clarify, we have gotten contacted by way too many single PUSHY men and people wanting to trade x-rated pics. It annoys me that they couldn't take the time to read our profile and know that we aren't interested.

I was having a bad day yesterday because someone I thought was the female half of a couple turned out to be a single male with a great story and supporting pics. I only found after talking to this person for a long time over a few days and finally asking for a phone call. I'm sorry if my hurt feelings over what happened came out as me being bitchy in the original post.

Toledo OH
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We are about to give up completely because all of the offers we have gotten are from people who apparently didn't read our profile or single men. We haven't had anyone mail us that fits what we want (and we aren't that picky) or even return our mails when we did the searching. We have only been members for a month or so, but I would think we would have gotten atleast one connection out of this by now. What are we doing wrong?

The Wifey

Toledo OH
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(161 posts)
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TOPIC: what are we doing wrong