Need some critique: Swingers Discussion 147715

155
Need some critique: Swingers Discussion 147715

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TOPIC: Need some critique

Created by: 619LOVINGIT619 Original Starting post for this thread:
Check out or profile and see if it can be improved. We been getting alot of fakes and posers lately. Is it not clear enough? Thanks in Advance.

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User Details are only visible to members.	Thanks nurse/doc. We appreciate it!
Mercer PA			Username hidden (2 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	The whole profile gives off a very negative feel - it reads as if you were angry when you wrote it and decided to take your anger out on the reader. Nothing you say is incorrect, but how it is phrased makes it borderline insulting. For example, instead of "please have half a brain to contact us", why not say "we give extra points for correct grammar and spelling"? Instead of "this is what we look like, if you don't like it your loss", why not "we aren't everyone's cup of tea, but if you like what you see we think we're fun company". Makes the same point, sounds better. Your profile is full of phrases like that. As I once said in another post on this forum, we all have had bad experiences and we tend to try to avoid those experiences in the future by putting them in our profile ... which fills our profile with tons of negative stuff and makes nobody want to contact us. Write it like you're trying to sell yourselves to us, make it upbeat and maybe even a bit funny, and watch the communication roll in.
West York PA			Username hidden (50 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Check out or profile and see if it can be improved. We been getting alot of fakes and posers lately. Is it not clear enough? Thanks in Advance.
Mercer PA			Username hidden (2 post)

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TOPIC: Need some critique