YOu know, you write well, but the use of "u" and "r" are distracting because the rest of your profile doesn't use textspeak.

Change the word "ceased" to "cease" in your tagline.

The second paragraph is the best, but the first could use some tightening up. Don't double parenthesis, it's unnecessary. Just make sure you have only one or two separate ideas in one sentence...read it out loud to each other and you'll see where natural pauses are.

Good luck, nice pics, and a decent profile with a few minor changes,
Gina