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So, Why don't I feel better about the weight I'm losing? : Swingers Discussion 239180
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TOPIC: So, Why don't I feel better about the weight I'm losing
Created by: SexusNTexas
Original Starting post for this thread:
Since fall began, my husband and I have been the most consistent about working out than we've been in the almost ten years we've been married. Plus lessening portions, eating cleaner, etc. Not always, but very consistent. We are both toning up and losing weight. I've lost almost 20 pounds. 188-169 He has lost about 8 pounds. He's looking better and better, got that V shape to his back, building up his chest and arms, and now seeing results in his stomach area. What's the problem? Here are the things I'm seeing and hearing about myself in this process: (not from my husband, he's been complimentary) "Wow, your boobs are SMALL now." "What are you now, a C cup?" "Your arms look more toned." That one was a nice one. I don't want to just be noticed b/c my boobs are smaller, or my clothes are baggier. Why can't anyone just say, "you're doing a good job."

and from myself? I am seeing looser skin on my arms and calves, softer, and I don't like it. Yes, my boobs ARE smaller, to me anyway, and to those who are pointing it out to me. Why am I not losing my gut? I'm losing all over, but this stomach issue is discouraging to me. My whole body shape has changed in the past, oh, 15 years or so, and it doesn't feel like me. My knee feels A LOT better. I feel a lot better. Someone I trust told me that my body shape has changed b/c 1. I'm older now, and 2. it's a diabetes thing.

Prob should have posted in the fitness area, but I like what we are doing together to improve ourselves, and want to continue to add exercises and reps and do what we're doing, only more. Plus I don't think I need advice, really, I just need to hear your experiences with this so I don't feel like the only one.

What is my question? ha. I don't know. Maybe just how to recognize that what I'm doing is a good thing, beneficial, and to ignore it when I get the weird comments, kind of embarrassing, and just continue on even if no one notices the changes.

Gina

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I agree Sexus ;) I think it's hard for us short, round, and bouncy women in a world filled with ads deifying skinny airbrushed lovelies. I like to think of fertility goddesses when I start feeling low...sound and bouncy used to be all the rage.

My first rejection stings a bit, the guy seemed interested but the lady was a no go...just as I was starting to get more excited than nervous about meeting. I'd like to say that the ladies who've commented here seem to be really beautiful people in mind, so regardless of size or shape bounciness or stick like, you are all beautiful and worthy in my eyes.

Monroe WA
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HisMinx, may I suggest that you be as kind to yourself as you are to the women you see in your work? I think if we do that, then we can still like/love ourselves even when we are going through transitions. Might not be where we want to be, but each day we are better than we were the day before, or at least making progress. Bad days and good, but they don't have to be defined by our clothing sizes or numbers on a scale.

Yes, I need to take my own advice too. Getting rid of my clothes that are not flattering really helps my mind clear about my body.

Gina

San Antonio TX
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What I wonder about is how I can see myself in the mirror one day and like what I see and then wake up the next day and be disgusted with what I see. It's so nice to know we aren't alone in these struggles. I'm new and just trying to get to know folks so I wanted to thank you all for this post and all the replies. I bet you all are lovely, no matter the weight, or problem area (mine is my belly too...something about having two kids and stretchmarks). What I've tried to do since is see myself through the eyes of friends and loved ones.

My job is all about supporting women during a very vulnerable time, and one of the things I tell them over and over is how beautiful they are...because to me even though they are exhausted and sweaty and smelly, they really truly are beautiful. I'm wanting to lose 30 lbs, I'll be happy with that number on the scale...but I'm seriously doubting the belly will leave and kind of scared if it does the drastic difference in appearance my skin will take on :( one things for sure it'll be super soft! lol

Monroe WA
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That's good advice all around. Gained a couple pounds during vacation, but instead of worrying about that, got right back into watching what I'm eating and have lost half of it. Eating in restaurants daily never has made me feel good. Mr and I both like to cook.

Still working on it, still seeing some results. Kind of stuck a bit, but that's okay. I feel better, and that's what counts, and looking better and buying some new things are perks.

San Antonio TX
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I have the same problem area. Even when I got down to 130, I still had a belly and hated it. Still hate it. It is the one thing that stands, in the way, of me having the body I want. The only advice I can offer is to focus, on what you have accomplished. Be aware of the areas, of your body, that need fixing so you can do what needs to be done, to do that but do not focus, on them.

Carrie

Corpus Christi TX
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Your question was "what's the problem"? From what I can tell, there isn't one! Seriously! You are eating right, working out, losing weight, AND you got to buy new clothes in a smaller size. Those are all things that tell me you are doing everything RIGHT! The problem is we want what we want and we want it NOW! We have become a society of instant gratification...fast food, fast cars, fast everything. When we try to lose weight and it doesn't come off as quickly as it goes on, we get frustrated and often times, discouraged. The good thing is, you are sticking with it! You have lost 20 lbs (maybe more?) so you have a LOT to be proud of. Try to concentrate on that and don't let small set-backs or even plateaus get you down. You got this!!! :-)

Palm Bay FL
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THanks for that post! Funny image of throwing the scale and it being like a boomerang and coming back to hit me in the head. Ha.

Got the stainless body fat, etc., scale. And back on track with the numbers. Yesterday was miserable, as for dinner we went to a Tex Mex place with friends and while I only ate about half my meal, I still felt icky and full. I no longer like that feeling. Satisfied yes. Stuffed no.

Congrats on the weight loss and bettering yourself. It's encouraging.

G.

San Antonio TX
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I personally prefer the lightest and cheapest scale I can find. That way when I don't like the number it puts up I can carry it to the door and see how far I can throw it in the yard. (in a pathetic attempt to teach it a lesson, lol) As long as the sizes are going down instead of up I count that as a WIN!! Congrats on the all the progress you and your hubby have made. My hubby and I are working on loosing some weight too, so far we are both down about 30lbs with an ideal 30 more to go. WooHoo half way there. As the song say Keep On Keeping On :)

De Graff OH
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Someone help me pick a decent scale! Our old digital one weighs us a few pounds less than a new one we bought. So, while we still have the same amount of weight loss, bleh, I don't like the number. It's 170.

But I did have to go shopping for new shorts. Size 14 petite. Sure beats other sizes I've been! And some misses 14's were too big! Yay!

Getting there SLOWLY, but still getting there.

I'm all about supporting each other, on whatever quest we follow.

San Antonio TX
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Mr and I both gained 2 pounds over the long weekend w/ my brother visiting. Okay, so, not so long ago I would've taken that to mean I "couldn't do it" and use it as an excuse to eat. But not anymore. We're back on track, and will keep progressing, knowing we don't and won't do this perfectly, but proud that we are doing it at all.

I currently weigh 167 and Mr. is at 197. I find it very liberating to tell my true weight. Now, about the height..I still really am 5'2" but sls still won't list that as my height. haha.

San Antonio TX
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TOPIC: So, Why don't I feel better about the weight I'm losing