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Sex vs Making Love : Swingers Discussion 174510
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TOPIC: Sex vs Making Love
Created by: bryonboru
Original Starting post for this thread:
This is R, the female of the couple wanting to ask you other ladies how you separate the two.

I'm having a hard time wanting to share my husband but yet I really like the arousal and fun we have talking about it. I'm confused. One side says lets do it and the other side tells me that the act of intercourse is special and is making love. Is this because of my upbringing or is this normal?

How did others feel when you got started?

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I do not get upset over terms such as fuck vs making love. I know lots of couples that made love only to each other and are now called ex-spouses...and know couples make love to others as well and are happily married. To me, if he is going to leave, he is going to leave...and making love only to each other will not keep a man or woman in a marriage if they are not happy. But I do not say those two words in swinging...women get upset lol.

San Marcos TX
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I have to disagree that a good hard physical fuck isn't or can't be lovemaking. I see lovemaking as that whole mental-emotional-connection component to sex in whatever physical form it might manifest on a given day.

So back to the original question... when you are actually mentally ready to take that first step and play with other people, you won't be struggling with that separating sex and lovemaking question anymore. How do you get there? No magic formula or timeline exists, just communication, communication, communication.

And starting slow and soft can be a great intro... just same room, own partner sex with another couple. I guarantee it will open thought processes and trigger emotional stuff that you didn't anticipate. Nobody says you just have to jump off the high dive into the deep end when you're just starting out. Moving faster than your communication skills and relationship can handle is a big part of why so many people start but dropout.

D (she)

Tucson AZ
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there is a difference between the two. When M makes love to me there is a emotional connection, and physical connection the way he touches me is different, the way he talks is different, the way he strokes me is different. Now when its just sex, the stroke may be a little more faster, harder, his words are totally on different playing field and the sex is definitely more uninhibited. gee just thinking about has me wet.lol

Buffalo NY
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Still You have a good point never thought of it that way. We appreciate your replies

Cpu Pace FL
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This is R, the female of the couple wanting to ask you other ladies how you separate the two.

I'm having a hard time wanting to share my husband but yet I really like the arousal and fun we have talking about it. I'm confused. One side says lets do it and the other side tells me that the act of intercourse is special and is making love. Is this because of my upbringing or is this normal?

How did others feel when you got started?

Cpu Pace FL
Username hidden
(48 posts)
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TOPIC: Sex vs Making Love