Masturbation practices: Swingers Discussion 137140

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TOPIC: Masturbation practices

Created by: BiFYorkCpl Original Starting post for this thread:
I briefly brought this up in another thread, but would love to get everyone's ideas and experiences here. I can honestly say that until I left my ex, I had never brought myself to orgasm through masturbation, and rarely even tried. On the other hand (pardon the pun), I have always been able to orgasm through touch...someone else's. And without delving into all the psychology behind "why that is," I find it interesting. I was given my first sex toy by a cool guy I met a few years back...he said that as much as I enjoyed sex and could cum and cum, I needed to have a vibrator/dildo and get myself off too. Ok. It's been fun "learning" my body and following "orders." (my husband now will tell me to "do yourself for me today." And sometimes, I just need an orgasm (or 17). It takes me longer, usually, to cum by myself than it does to orgasm in the hands of a capable partner. I cum most and most intensely through touch. And mostly clitoral, although, I can orgasm just from having my elbows stroked in a certain way (a whole other topic). I know we're all different. And from the women's mags, I am not "normal" (whatever that is). "Most" women, supposedly, can masturbate to orgasm more often, more intensely, more successfully than they can through sex with a partner. Interesting stats, but is that true? Is it true for You? Thanks for reading this...there's more to it, but this is long enough. Thoughts? Gina

Created by: BiFYorkCpl
Original Starting post for this thread:

I briefly brought this up in another thread, but would love to get everyone's ideas and experiences here.  

I can honestly say that until I left my ex, I had never brought myself to orgasm through masturbation, and rarely even tried.  On the other hand (pardon the pun), I have always been able to orgasm through touch...someone else's.  And without delving into all the psychology behind "why that is," I find it interesting.  

I was given my first sex toy by a cool guy I met a few years back...he said that as much as I enjoyed sex and could cum and cum, I needed to have a vibrator/dildo and get myself off too.  Ok.  It's been fun "learning" my body and following "orders."  (my husband now will tell me to "do yourself for me today."

And sometimes, I just need an orgasm (or 17).

It takes me longer, usually, to cum by myself than it does to orgasm in the hands of a capable partner.  I cum most and most intensely through touch.  And mostly clitoral, although, I can orgasm just from having my elbows stroked in a certain way (a whole other topic).

I know we're all different.  And from the women's mags, I am not "normal" (whatever that is).  "Most" women, supposedly, can masturbate to orgasm more often, more intensely, more successfully than they can through sex with a partner.  Interesting stats, but is that true?  Is it true for You?

Thanks for reading this...there's more to it, but this is long enough.  Thoughts?
Gina

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User Details are only visible to members.	I think it's mostly a mindset...if my mind is turned on, my body follows, whether alone or with someone, but MOSTLY with someone! I guess that makes me a People Person? Ha. You're the only one who's ever called me "playa" with that swagger in your voice. :) liked it!
San Antonio TX			Username hidden (5609 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Well what'd you find out playa?
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23665 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I just have to naturally question any statement starting with "all." There are usually exceptions. See? I didn't even say there are "always" exceptions. All and Never are absolutes and to be avoided. At least by me. Maybe all women have the physiology, but orgasms are more than just a physical phenomenon. I would never flaunt my ability or ease in having orgasms. For me, sometimes I think it has a bit to do with not having a mature central nervous system (I was 3 months premature when born) and being over-sensitive. Who knows? It's just how I am, and nothing I do or don't do, so I can't take credit (actually, Dan says with a smile that HE can take credit...as an orgasm donor...LOL). Okay, going to go try out some of these theories. Gina
San Antonio TX			Username hidden (5609 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Dagger, it sounds like you and I are alot alike. With me I honestly do not know why I am not a quick cummer. I do have multiple orgasms, just not with playmates...because honestly in my experience as I have said before, they give you 20 minutes and think you are supposed to just go DING and like a light switch, cum. SOOOOOOO many in the lifestyle see the orgasm as the perverbial "job well done" symbol and that is something I disagree with. And like dagger said, if I am tired or stressed or pissed its better for me to enjoy a hot bath and a good book cause its not happening lol.
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23665 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	or that brunettes are smarter..." I'm not smarter? I'm kidding.
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23665 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	No personal offense taken or meant here. For me, because issues with sex and orgasm are anatomical and hormonal, rather than what the good doctor suggested in her article as complacency or lack of effort, I would still be the exception to the statement. In theory, humans are anatomically built to walk upright, but legions of wheelchair users would disagree that the generalization applies to them. That's what I meant. (I'm the chick)
Wormleysburg PA			Username hidden (69 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	well heck maybe I just figured out why mothering doesn't come natural to me, its because I'm multi orgasmic! (and before anyone gets upset I joking!) and truthfully I would rather be a naturally gifted mother then multi-orgasmic if I had to choose. PG
Louisville KY			Username hidden (14014 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I, too, thought that generalization was demeaning to women. It's the kind of statement that bites, whether trying to be humorous or whatever. I have met quite a few women who do not orgasm so easily, and are not multiple at all. But they all still enjoy sex in all its many forms, and so it's not so much an issue until they are battered with a generalized statement that can be read as a put down. All women are sensitive to comments about their orgasms. See how silly that sounds? All women are good mothers by nature...stuff like that. Okay, enough from me on this.
San Antonio TX			Username hidden (5609 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	How rude of me to ignore the OP. There are two ways I can climax, vibration or running water. Period. No amount of stimulation of any other kind even gets close, whether it's by me or a partner or a number of partners. Not by intercourse, not by oral, not by hands or any other body part. For me, sexual contact with partners has almost nothing to do with my own orgasm and usually prevents it. It's about sharing sensuous pleasures of different kinds, and others' orgasms generally are present as a byproduct of a fun time. For me to masturbate, the tv needs to be off, the dwelling should be empty, the cat should leave the room, etc. Even with peace and quiet there are times when my body just doesn't respond at all even to my own efforts, due to imbalance of hormones. Yes, this can be frustrating, but I don't think it means I'm not female. I enjoy cheesecake, but I won't turn down a scrumptious plate of shrimp ziti pesto just because it doesn't come with cheesecake, nor will I pout that it wasn't a real dinner because somebody didn't give me cheesecake. I just have to make my own cheesecake and hope that the ingredients are in the cupboards when I get ready to bake. (I'm the chick, and the man made me homemade spaghetti with meat sauce this evening, literally)
Wormleysburg PA			Username hidden (69 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Thanks for demeaning either my number of my orgasms or whether I am even female by repeating a generalizing statement that perpetuates a stereotype which is not fulfilled by even half the individuals it describes. Not a personal thing at all Des, that sort of statement just gets my goat by creating unrealistic expectations. Just as fair or true to say that men over 35 will inevitably come once then fall asleep, that all gay men have fabulous fashion sense by nature, or that brunettes are smarter... (I'm the chick)
Wormleysburg PA			Username hidden (69 post)

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TOPIC: Masturbation practices

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