How do you forgive: Swingers Discussion 2048191011

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How do you forgive: Swingers Discussion 2048191011

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TOPIC: How do you forgive

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User Details are only visible to members.	I will forgive but I cant/dont/wont forget. I am not sure if I just cant, or wont or dammit I just might not want to. I gave myself permission years ago to stop validating what I do so others "understand" me. I dont care if they understand me I am me. Just like I told a close loved one, I dont care that you didnt MEAN to make me feel that way by doing ___________(insert what was done) it makes me feel like______________ (insert emotion) and YOU dont get to decide HOW that makes me feel. Or have the right to tell me YOU SHOULDNT FEEL LIKE THAT ITS NOT HOW I MEANT IT. Fk what you meant, if it makes me feel this way it makes me feel this way. Forgivenss is easy, I let it go and I believe in Karma. Forgetting is much harder for me. Unless its an appt or my keys.. LOL.
Spring TX			Username hidden (1853 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	oh.... i dont think that is a bad trait or a cold bitch. I think that is a wise way of protecting yourself from someone who has repeatedly hurt or disappointed you, yet not detach completely. I have had to do this with my father as well. Being hurt by him became unbearable but total estrangement deeply bothered 'me'. I did what you did and I had to care for him until his last breathe. I have never had one regret about it at all. I think it was the wisest form of self preservation I have ever exercised actually.
Kunkletown PA			Username hidden (2981 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I'm one of those people that lets things slide again and again... until one more thing (and it can be little or big) is the straw that breaks the camels back. Once I hit that point and my feelings toward a person changes, I can't go back. My mother tells me this is my worst trait. Its not that I suddenly hate the person but my emotional connection to them is just done. I might have to continue to deal with them but I no longer value their opinion nor care to have a relationship with them. I also dont get angry about the things they do because I just dont care. I'm this way with my Father. My brother is still emotionally caught up in bitterness about our childhood and yet has an incredible need to connect to him as a "Dad" and now "Papa." Not me. I'm completely indifferent. I do my daughterly duties and see him a few times a year, I facilitate him seeing his grandsons, I help rein in my brother's emotional reactions but I dont have any kind of response to the situation. My father lost me years ago. He gets to spend time with me but he doesn't know me. Bet y'all didn't know I'm such a "cold bitch"... lol
Pittsburgh PA			Username hidden (4061 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	shit, i dont know LOL! Hold on, give me 5 hahaha
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23665 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I think it depends on what the person did wrong. If you give a scenario , that might help
Augusta NJ			Username hidden (16075 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	hahahaha either and or
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23665 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	hmmm... is this about little stuff or big stuff, or both?
Kunkletown PA			Username hidden (2981 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Our convos and the fact that I am sitting here (and should be up cleaning something) has me wondering. How do y'all get over things. Everyone does it their own way. There is the one that is so laid back, nothing bothers her. Then there is the one that truly forgives...and forgets. The lady that forgives, but never forgets....and the one that holds a grudge until doomsday never forgives and never, ever forgets. From what I have seen, most women I think....do forgive, but they never forget. And as soon as they are pissed off...its like they are as mad as the day it happened. My mom bounces between 2. IF she forgives you, she never forgets. Ever. IF she forgives you. Me? Depends on the situation. Most times I try and not pay attention. If I know about it I pay attention so I ask not to really know about things. If I know yes, I probably will forgive if I feel that what I am getting is sincere. And there is hurt where I do try to forgive...but I will never forget. I am a work in progress....I am not to the place where I ever truly forgive. I never forget.
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23665 post)

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TOPIC: How do you forgive