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DOES YOUR MAN : Swingers Discussion 51746
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TOPIC: DOES YOUR MAN
Created by: satisfaction580
Original Starting post for this thread:
Why is it that my husband finds that it is okay to have a M, F, M, F or a M,F,F experience but doesn't want me to have a M,M,F. He tells me that he get enjoyment seeing me getting pleased by another woman and this way everyone has an equal amount of play. As for another male it would strictly be my pleasure. Please Help!!!!!!!

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Ditto to what Perm said, that's us too, lol. It's year 5 for us though, its easy because we worked at it the first year in this lifestyle. Keep it all honest, it's the best advice I can give you and do what works for you as a couple. As for him deriving pleasure from a MFM, he could in watching, joining in and taking pictures and even if he were to set up the play for you as a surprise.

Philadelphia PA
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We pretty much stick with couples and not a single male because I can get everything from the male half of the couple that I can from a single male...plus the added bonus of the other female being enjoyed by my husband so its a win win for us. If the woman happens to be bi.... then thats triple bonus points.

Mountain Ranch CA
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Many people have touched on what I think, but to add MY .02 from my point of view.... We do MFM for the sheer fact, that finding couples where ALL 'click' is HARD. If it wasn't for single men, we'd sit at home LOTS,lol... When we first started this lifestyle, yea, my hubby was a bit intimidated, wanted me to do women, but I found out, I'm NOT bi. So there the FMF is extremely hard to do...there are basically no straight women. My hubby has found that throwing a MFM threesome in the equation once in a while, just keeps my motor hot, till something different comes along.... Both him and I have pretty well shut the door on FMF...Besides, if you're not getting what you want once in a while, and he is?...isn't that 'taking one for the team'?

Simonton TX
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I know for us its the single male stigma. While there are good single men out there you have to admit that there are those that just don't get it. We indirectly had a bad experience with a single guy. Found out that he stole pics from a couple we know and was saying she was going to leave her man for him. We let the couple know what was going on. Of course the single guy was lying. The worst part is that he kept trying to get between Craig and I. Would message only to talk to me and try to tell me that Craig isn't the man that i think he is and that he is doing things he shouldn't be. We blocked him. He would just create another screen name and we would block him again. It kinda left a bad taste in our mouth.

Kisses

Zoe

Mayfield PA
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nope... we have done.. mfm..fmf..fffffm ... mfmfmfmfmfmfmfmfmfmfmf.. mfmf..mffm.. lol.. ok i'll stop..

Bridgeport PA
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It sounds like either you are not communicating or he is getting more out of the experience than you are. I do not know your situation personally, so I really could not say. But from what I read, it sounds like you are frustrated. That in itself indicates that your needs or wants are getting overlooked, which is not healthy for your relationship. When you are FMF and he plays with the female too, is he not getting double satisfaction? The satisfaction of watching 2 women together and the satisfaction of having another woman too. If he is, then he is getting that extra advantage that you are not with the MFM side. Maybe he does not understand that you occasionally want something different sometimes or he has fears of the MFM swinging that needs to be laid to rest. Maybe he is being selfish cause in all scenarios, he gets an extra member of the opposite sex. Like I said, I don't know your situation personally and there is too many "IFS" so I really dunno.

I would suggest you talk to him about this in a relaxed atmosphere. Try to compromise so that you switch off, FMF, MFMF, MFM equally so that everyone gets a little taste of swinging. You might tell him that while he is enjoying the FMF for both you and him, he gets double enjoyment and you feel you are missing out on something. Tell him that you want to have the MFM for your pleasure too if that is what you are really wanting.

If you can't work it out, then I would suggest you think long and hard about how swinging is affecting your relationship and happiness, cause you don't sound happy to me. Again, that is not healthy either and you will remain stressed over this. You are in a tough situation and IMO, a problem exist and communication is your only option.

Just my .03 cents

Fort Worth TX
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Why is it that my husband finds that it is okay to have a M, F, M, F or a M,F,F experience but doesn't want me to have a M,M,F. He tells me that he get enjoyment seeing me getting pleased by another woman and this way everyone has an equal amount of play. As for another male it would strictly be my pleasure. Please Help!!!!!!!

Hillsboro TX
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TOPIC: DOES YOUR MAN