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Swinging Single after Divorce - any advice : Swingers Discussion 76373
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TOPIC: Swinging Single after Divorce - any advice
Created by: Darrelbear
Original Starting post for this thread:
I dated a few swingers several years ago, before I met my now-ex-wife (married less than 2 years before breakup; divorce was final last December), but I never really got into the lifestyle then. I had those friends to have fun with on rare occasions, but I didn't go to any swingers' parties. My ex-wife wasn't into that, so once we started dating, I didn't pursue it further... despite some urging from some close friends.

(BTW, my desire for the lifestyle and her opposition to it was *not* any factor in our breakup - there were many other reasons for that)

But... unfortunately... for a single guy to break into this is quite a daunting task. Being referred to this website by one friend (who moved out of state last year) was a big plus, that's for sure, but without a partner with me, being a single guy new to the lifestyle is proving challenging.

I've got a very large house, and have been thinking of hosting a party down the road somtime... but I want to *go* to a few first to know what the proper etiquette is. One problem about that plan is that most local parties don't offer invites to single men.

Well, that's an awful lot for one post... a lot of topics that I probably should have split up into different threads [lol] but if anyone has any advice on any of these issues, let me know.

--Darrel.

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Sihot, This is ABSOLUTELY off topic. However, I perved your pics :0) I LOVE the color of your complexion. Do you tan regularly? Shells


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How to be successful with couples? Keep it simple. Couples aren't that different from single women, we like the same qualities in a single guy that most single women like. Charming, flirtatious, sincere, and easy going, are all we ask for. If you are selfish, self centered, and goal orientated, you'll just piss us off. As in most things in life, enjoy the journey, and the destination will be upon you before you know it.

Many couples won't mind if you contact them first, but you have to be polite. You have to arouse our curiosity, so it has to be more than a one liner. Of course, target only receptive couples. If their profile states no single men, or they will contact you, move on. Patience is everything.

Good luck!

Mr Pleasant

Owasso OK
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Don't tease me...LOL Shelly


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Hey Atlanta, how about you addition your self to Texas.... just a suggestion :0) Shell


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-Set long term goals of integrating into the local scene. -Make it a point to befriend the men do not focus on the women. -Gentlemen-Dogs are in hi demand but are very rare indeed. -Consider having a SMALL meet and greet at your home. The comfort level will allow for nature to take it's course. Be very selective with whom you let into your home. -Secure all valuables. -Set limits on access. Which rooms are off limits etc. -Make sure to have other trusted souls looking out for your home. That way you can relax and enjoy some of the fun. -One option. The men whose friendship you cultivate...Suggest He and his wife have a small gathering at you home. They can host. You provide the space. -Post and get known at the meet and greets as a nice, friendly, nonpushy, guy.

Suggest remembering my cardinal rule. Never assume anything when in bed with couples. There will/may be all kinds of limits that have not been communicated to you. Merely because you are in bed with them does not mean everything is a green light. Be prepared to stop on a dime if the situation changes. Do not overstay. Leave them early. Let them bond over the experience. You are the extra not the main course.

Remember to always have fun but have NO expectations. It will serve you better in the long run.

Mischief.....playing single for a long time.

Glen Burnie MD
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My opinion, Post an event that you're hosting a party, How you make the party depends on you. Who you will let in the party it can be anything from couples and singles, to couples and single fems. There are lots of swingers looking for neutral territory to go to. Some have kids and can't host parties. If you host parties people will show. Be prepared to set a maximum limit of people after a while. Oh the clean up can be a challange too. lol Just set some rules that you expect people to follow (No drugs, BYOB, Pot Luck, etc etc...) If you don't want smoking in your house have an area outside for smokers a good distance from the entrance to the house so the smoke smell doesn't come in the house.

Port Saint Lucie FL
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Sorry... my thoughts were a bit scattered in that post, weren't they?

Advice on breaking into the lifestyle as a single guy.

Advice on hosting parties sometime in the future - I have a really nice house, hot tub, firepit, secluded backyard, a few currently empty bedrooms, etc... just no experience for hosting lifestyle parties... yet.

Advice on my profile... How do I come across to you?

Anyways, that's what I was looking for with this thread. Anyone want to put their two cents' worth in?

Lemon Grove CA
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I dated a few swingers several years ago, before I met my now-ex-wife (married less than 2 years before breakup; divorce was final last December), but I never really got into the lifestyle then. I had those friends to have fun with on rare occasions, but I didn't go to any swingers' parties. My ex-wife wasn't into that, so once we started dating, I didn't pursue it further... despite some urging from some close friends.

(BTW, my desire for the lifestyle and her opposition to it was *not* any factor in our breakup - there were many other reasons for that)

But... unfortunately... for a single guy to break into this is quite a daunting task. Being referred to this website by one friend (who moved out of state last year) was a big plus, that's for sure, but without a partner with me, being a single guy new to the lifestyle is proving challenging.

I've got a very large house, and have been thinking of hosting a party down the road somtime... but I want to *go* to a few first to know what the proper etiquette is. One problem about that plan is that most local parties don't offer invites to single men.

Well, that's an awful lot for one post... a lot of topics that I probably should have split up into different threads [lol] but if anyone has any advice on any of these issues, let me know.

--Darrel.

Lemon Grove CA
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(6 posts)
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TOPIC: Swinging Single after Divorce - any advice