Guide for meeting single women for single men: Swingers Discussion 36364

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TOPIC: Guide for meeting single women for single men

Created by: ABSingleMan Original Starting post for this thread:
OK, I'm going to ask the question that nobody has asked or wanted to ask. What does a single man do differently when he wants to meet a single woman involved in the swinging lifestyle as opposed to meeting single women strictly for dating? I have actually met women in real life who are on this site and had some fun times with them, but as soon as they come across my ad, I can't get two words out of them the next time I see them. Happened once around this time last year and it really pissed me off because I had just posted a picture on my profile a couple of hours after she called me and said to bring an overnight bag. When I arrived she kicked me out and accused me of stalking her online. Oh, she didn't have pictures on her profile and never sent me one. Her ad said she lived in Chicago, but then she changed it a few days later. I wasn't able to even view it a few days after that. Maybe thats an extreme case. But really, what do you say differently to a sing woman on a swing site you are interested in and believe would be interested in you than you would to a woman you would meet in real life or on a dating site? Many men want to know, and maybe you single women and couples who were once single swingers can tell us guys why we are treated differently by the same women when it comes to swinging versus regular boy-girl dating.

Created by: ABSingleMan
Original Starting post for this thread:

OK, I'm going to ask the question that nobody has asked or wanted to ask. What does a single man do differently when he wants to meet a single woman involved in the swinging lifestyle as opposed to meeting single women strictly for dating?

I have actually met women in real life who are on this site and had some fun times with them, but as soon as they come across my ad, I can't get two words out of them the next time I see them. Happened once around this time last year and it really pissed me off because I had just posted a picture on my profile a couple of hours after she called me and said to bring an overnight bag. When I arrived she kicked me out and accused me of stalking her online. Oh, she didn't have pictures on her profile and never sent me one. Her ad said she lived in Chicago, but then she changed it a few days later. I wasn't able to even view it a few days after that.

Maybe thats an extreme case. But really, what do you say differently to a sing woman on a swing site you are interested in and believe would be interested in you than you would to a woman you would meet in real life or on a dating site? Many men want to know, and maybe you single women and couples who were once single swingers can tell us guys why we are treated differently by the same women when it comes to swinging versus regular boy-girl dating.

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User Details are only visible to members.	Well here's a general guide for how not to approach women here. Oh and they just signed up today? The profile has two sentences in it. No picture. Hmm - maybe I should refer them to Craigslist. "I and a co-worker are coming to glendale ca apr 7-10 from the east coast we have daily business seminars but a night? we want you to be our ultra sexy cali hostess for nightly adventures i'm new to this site pics in a day or so i'm 6'2" short brown hair , blue/green eyes, thin/athletic, funny, big smile, long , hard. looking forward to hearing from you." DELETE
Henderson NV			Username hidden (6 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	A whole lot of great information, and a lot of things I've tried to say but couldn't find the words.
Lansing MI			Username hidden (145 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Mercedess331, Welcum sexy lady to the forums. Damn, got me another virgin poster. The married men who are playing with his spouses permission are usually much more respectful and the younger singles men have much to learn. I would just ignore or block the less respectful ones and keep yourself open to those who are more desirable. I would limit my contacts with members until you have a feel for their disposition. By that I mean keeping it to a few PC's or e-mails until you feel comfy. Meeting you is a privilege and if they hint at being rude, there are sooo many others to play with on here that are sweet and respectful. After all, we know in the end, the sex is everyone's main objective. Raven
Fort Worth TX			Username hidden (8590 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I am posting here because something in Mercedes' post caught my eye. I am contacted by single males from time to time who want to help me play with my friends. I have a rule that I must meet single males in person for a beer to see if they qualify to join my club. Invariably, I get a comment like, "If we meet, and you like me, can we go see some of your friends and have sex with them?" Usually, the SM comes up with some bogus excuse as to why he can't meet me for a beer, then continues to contact me online to ask if he can join me for sex with my friends. My response is always "Sorry, but we have not gotten the required meeting in person out of the way first!". What is the underlying erroneous premise of the foregoing comments? It assumes that I make the decision as to who plays with my swing friends. To the contrary, it is my swing friends who makes the decision who plays with them. Is this not basic common sense? There is an incredible demand for fit, experienced, intelligent, clean, personable single males. There is very little demand for fat, inexperienced, stupid, dirty, socially clumsy single males.
Memphis TN			Username hidden (856 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I like that I can pick up males and females just to fuck. If a friendship comes out of it, then it is a bonus, but I meet to fuck. I also love being treated with respect. Vanilla guys just do not understand why I avoid the emotional aspect of a relationship. They feel rejected if I enjoy them and then move on to the next. They have a hard time with the concept of variety. Someday, I will meet someone and the sparks will fly and they will leave me breathless on an emotional level, but until then, I wanna play! I get tons of offers off SLS and I have to say: Guys that are original, confident, humorous, intelligent, polite, sweet, flirty, and read my profile are the ones meeting me for fun. I hate for a guy to write "wanna fuck?" cause that is a stupid question and shows no intelligence. Nahhhhh, I placed my profile on here cause I want someone to wash my car!
Fort Worth TX			Username hidden (8590 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Well said Wolf!
Quartz Hill CA			Username hidden (2 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	alex has a good point, which explains my lack of success. Some of us are not any good at the bar scenes. I have to admit up front, I have had no success establishing a relationship with a couple from this site. I have met a few single women. Like Alex said, treat them with respect, get to know them, learn about some of the things that are on their mind, then you will eventually get to meet the lady in real life. If that meeting is a success, the physical enjoyment comes naturally. As far as the bar scene, I'm 50 and still hopeless there, lol. But then, I guess I have a similar perspective. If the lady isn't bright enough to see my virtues, do I really want her in my bed?
Bell City LA			Username hidden (5 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Wel the women that I have met in REAL life think that I am a perv when I tell them mi intrest
Danville VA			Username hidden (2 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	There are two distinct categories of single women who patronize sites like these. Some are looking strictly for sex. They are married/attached, they are at a point in life where they just don't want any entanglements, or they are looking for something specific and unusual, like encounters with couples or a gangbang. The rest of us are looking for real friendships, and possibly for an LTR if the right guy shows up. We're on sites like this because we're into the Lifestyle and don't want to waste our time with vanilla guys who Don't Get It. And because many of us are not at all averse to meeting someone purely for sex from time to time if the urge strikes. Dating a woman from category B is in most ways no different from dating a vanilla woman; in fact, we're insulted by men who categorize women as "dating material" or "sluts who like to fuck" as if the two things were mutually exclusive. The big difference is that you can arrive at your first date knowing that you share an interest in sex and the Lifestyle. This means it's not only safe to talk about it, but expected. You can reasonably assume that the woman is interested in playing with you if she likes you, if not on the first date, then fairly soon afterwards; none of this "make him go out with me five times first" crap. And if she likes you, there is a very strong probability that your second, third or fourth date could be a swingers' event. But it is otherwise just like any other date. The woman still wants to be treated with respect, and wants to know all about you, not just about your sexual turn-ons and your cock size. If you act like you expect to be fucking an hour after meeting, you will piss her off. A Category A woman also wants to be treated with respect, and is also going to want to know about who you are rather than just how you like to fuck. The difference is that she doesn't want quite as much information and is probably not going to want to go out on a full-scale date. More likely, she just wants to have a drink with you to establish rapport before playing. Neither category of woman wants to be insulted with an "I wanna eat your pussy" email from a total stranger. Contact women whose profiles seem to indicate they are looking for the same thing you are and tell them a little about yourself. Make reference to what they said in their profiles. And then let them take the lead.
Springfield VA			Username hidden (262 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	TPA...in the armpit of Maryland. Port Deposit..
Glen Burnie MD			Username hidden (2785 post)

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TOPIC: Guide for meeting single women for single men

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