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Does swinging alone for cpls spell disaster : Swingers Discussion 51365101
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TOPIC: Does swinging alone for cpls spell disaster
Created by: horsenirdercpl The original post for this thread was deleted.
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We are cool with one of us swinging alone. She tends to travel often and we discussed it and agreed it was ok if she found someone she was very attracted and enjoyed being with, vice versa.

Now, she's never acted upon it, due mainly to the fact that when she travels, she's usually working long hours. I've only played once without her present and it was with a couple that we've known and played with for a few years.

Was it a big deal for us? Not at all. To stress what others has said, communication and honesty is the key.

Also, I've noticed a few rants about cheating spouses. As a firm rule, we don't play with people that we know are cheating on thier spouses. At the same time, we don't pass judgement on them. I wouldn't discount them as bad people unless I knew for a fact that they were. Unless you're living with them, you don't know what thier homelife is like and nor do you know thier reasons for having affairs. To each his or her own.

L.

Lexington KY
 
 
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yes it does atleast in our case it did when my ex informed me that she was going to play with this couple i did not like at all by herself after she tried to convince me to let her i was gone two days later if your a couple be a couple in everything you do i think it shows nothing but disrespect to do otherwise.

Glen Burnie MD
 
 
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We know one couple that swings separately. The female goes off with a stranger for fun. I hate to say this, but we're against it fully. There are too many wackos out there to swing alone. Safe sex is not only using protection, but it's actually protecting yourself as well. Hubby has to baby sit the men who refuse to wear condoms.

Plantation FL
 
 
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We agree that it's not too difficult to tell who is really married and playing alone without the spouse's knowledge. We have mixed feelings about that. I am not comfortable playing with a cheater. Mrs. Valovers figures that it's THEIR business, not ours.

In the meantime, we don't go there.

Jim

South Riding VA
 
 
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Your absolutely correct, Frank

Gulf Shores AL
 
 
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WM, that works both ways. How many 'single' fellas are in reality a couple? Herein lies the same scenerio with a flip.

Gulf Shores AL
 
 
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dwbscb Well if you look around this has been discussed several times. There are a lot of couples that if they found out the woman was married and cheating they would not play with her. It goes to the point of trying to avoid drama and not wanting the chance of being put into a bad position if the Unknowing husband found out. There are a some that don't care if the woman is married. This again goes to supply and demand. There are too few (single women) and too many couples and single males demanding them.

I can clearly see the point of both groups.

To answer the thread. Swinging alone is not a problem for couples that communicate well and both are in the same line of thought that this is just sexual exploration. If it becomes more than they need to discuss poly relationships before jumping into that. In regard to intro's to others. I agree with the post that stated you should meet other couples as a couple. Also I would throw in there that you both should attend parties and get yourselves known. It's only thru these ways with people in this lifestyle will people feel more comfortable with including you on individual invites. There might always be exceptions to the above, but they are rare.

Sandston VA
 
 
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For us, as long as you both swing, we'd be fine with it. It's not so much swinging separately that we worry about, it's couples where one swings and one doesn't. Even with full knowledge and consent of the non-playing partner, I worry about jealousy and drama issues in that situation more so than when both people are involved. Plus, if one isn't playing, that one can "safely" use the other's swinging as a weapon if they were so inclined- and I don't want to be in the line of fire when one spouse decides to play that card against the other.

L.

Ithaca NY
 
 
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TOPIC: Does swinging alone for cpls spell disaster