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jealousy : Swingers Discussion 186237101
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TOPIC: jealousy
Created by: krbenet The original post for this thread was deleted.
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jealousy is such a bad word. i would love to see my wife with someone else as long as all have fun

New Braunfels TX
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Jealousy = Insecurity & Fear. If someone doesn't care, they won't get jealous. If someone feels loved and safe/secure, they won't have any problem. If there's insecurity and/or fear in a relationship, it's like discovering a flat tire on your car...it should be immediately addressed and corrected. Failure to address and correct either condition will have both short-term and long-term consequences. Everyone, in or out of the LS, has occasional flashes of jealousy. The phrase "You're having too much fun!" has been uttered by everyone at one time or another. Addressing the underlying fear and anxiety is Never a bad thing for a relationship, whether you swing or not.


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Honestly, it makes me chuckle. To see someone behave that way and make an ass of themself makes me smile and walk away. You canNOT control how others behave, so you should not waste your time trying. You can only control how you yourself behave. Walk away and have fun with someone else who does not have those issues is my only real suggestion.

San Marcos TX
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Ok so help me out here friends....what do you do when a woman (or man) from another couple gets jealous over the counterpart person of a couple they've played with and basically cock-block so they don't play with anyone else? It happened to us and would love to know how it could have been handled without telling what actually happened. Thanks.

Worthington OH
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I as a woman have had feelings of jealousy when we are with another woman. I just communicate and say that I am feeling jealous. Communication is the key. Everyone involved has always been understanding. We might just change positions and I dont feel jealous anymore. I also try to make sure the other woman involved does not feel left out. It is about being adults and good communication.

Citrus Heights CA
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Jealousy is rooted in fear. We've had our bouts of jealousy a few times when one or the other is 'having too much fun'. LOL We use that to address what's causing the fear and clear that up. Not the behavior that caused the jealousy but the cause of the fear. Feelings of being left out, of being unwanted, of being un-pretty or undesirable, etc. Resolve that, and the jealousy disappears (and you strengthen your relationship too)!


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I'm not too sure if you need more stories but I'd be glad to share ours! I've always been attracted to women and at first he was really threatened by it when I told him. So I let it go. About a year and 6 months of us dating we got an apt together and threw a house warming party... one other couple, us, and a friend who was a stripper, ANNND a handle of Jager. Add a hot tub and the guys were daring the three girls to kiss... kissing turned into a girl on girl free for all and the guys joined in here or there but it got weird fast and my husband and I left the room (OUR bedroom haha). Fast forward about two years and he brings up swinging because we were having trouble finding single women who didn't want SOMETHING to do with a guy in a three way (long story of why for a diff. place/time) so we called the local party hosters and they told us to register here and join group so they could pre-screen us for the next party. We spent some time going through the guest list and decided to go. By this point we had laid down every possible senario of well what if... and what the other person's limits were and what not to ask while other people were around the both of us etc. The first time I soft swapped he was drunk and too into the BJ he was getting at the party that when the man grabbed my head and basically made me (made not being the proper word but the only one that comes to mind right now - not forced to as I could've spoken up) blow him and I was trying to signal to my husband that I wasn't okay with this-- After that we had a fight between each other and spent a lot more time talking with the couple after that about it. We slowed way down and met a couple that was awesome to chill with and when oral came back on the table, in my own home, with people I was comfortable with, and after a lot of thought on my end - it was awesome!!! At that point I began to open up big time to this lifestyle, and realized that while it may say they might do x it means they MIGHT! For us, a lot of our choices depend on the couple we are dealing with, where we are in our relationship, and so on.

From MY eyes I don't think you need to be jealous in this lifestyle... The reason why, I think, *many* couples are here is to fulfill extra wants/fantasies not find someone and sneak behind our significant other's back!! I don't get jealous when he fucks another woman because I trust in him, our relationship, and the other person's relationship (if they're a couple)

Charleston SC
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And We do go to the clubs and others do hit on her and I .neither of us get upset or storm off. At the end of the night were going home to one another.

Lancaster NY
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It was our first time and I wasn't ready for another male at that moment. That's why we did with a couple we know and were comfortable with. So don't imply i'm crazy or such..you don't know me or anything about us. As I said were in this together. NOt replace eachother...too many times I've read about someone leaving for another... I just made it clear. I have no intentions or feelings for anyone other than my wife.. and she knows that . A lot of couples or singles for that bring too much drama to the table... so a heads up for you 'ones' out there looking to split people.. don't.. and btw from the sounds ,Clearly you don't read.... i

Lancaster NY
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i always wondered whats the dealio...60% divorce rate? nah....then we met some couples in swinging and i was like ohhhhhhhhhh LOL

San Marcos TX
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TOPIC: jealousy