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finding the right couple : Swingers Discussion 188252
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TOPIC: finding the right couple
Created by: tnt742
Original Starting post for this thread:
We have been members for about 3 months Seems we only get messages from couples who are older or not attractive to us at all. When we send the first message we are not replied to :( is there something we are doing wrong?

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TNT - in addition to just e-mailing those profiles that you have interest in, we suggest trying to find a local meet & greet, party or club in your area to meet people. Not only will you up your chances of meeting someone compatible, but it will save you from wasting time with someone you might think is "real", only to find out later than they have no intention of meeting in person, and are probably just a single male pretending to be a couple.

We've been on SLS actively for over a year now and can count on one hand the actual number of people we've met through email conversation only. On the other hand, we have met a decent number of members at lifestyle events and gatherings...it took us a while before we finally went to one (we were worried they would be too "wild" or "aggressive"), but are glad we finally started!

Pittsburgh PA
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tnt742, we have been members for about as long as you and have also had difficulty, either hearing from couples that are not quite what we want (for a range of reasons, some remarkably arbitrary) or not getting replies (not even short rejection messages) from the few that we contacted. However, we know that we are very picky... and think that we should be! We probably unfairly turned a few down (that we would consider now) when we first joined and panicked at the sheer number of messages that we received. Oops!

But I don't think that two or three months of seeking and not finding perfect-match couples through one site is the end of the world. We found good SMs; that is a start! And think about how long singles just seeking romance in the vanilla world might take to find each other when only using a dating site. Now exponentiate the difficulty! Four people feeling mutually attracted to each other just from online profiles alone... that is pretty tough.

From the forum posts here, I gather that many people do find enjoyable success through this site, but that it is not an immediate process and takes patience, a willingness to politely turn down those who do not match, and an ability to shrug off and forget about who never answered your messages.

Good luck from your fellow site newbs!

Mrs.DE

Federal Way WA
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what is it about the boobs/cock line that is getting everyone ruffled...do you not think she has tits and he has a cock? Or are they eunuchs.

San Marcos TX
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Before you hit your 'send' button, are you paying attention to cert's? To the other couple's profiles and age preferences?

More than a few 'couple' profiles on SLS and other LS boards are actually: >SM's pretending to be a cpl, but she's never available to talk. >Married M's cheating. >Married M's who want you to 'persuade' their spouse (who doesn't know anything about it!). >Really couples who're keeping the LS in fantasyland for now. >Really couples who actually meet and play.

Yes, there are actually 'for real' people online, but you're going to have to have patience to find 'em as they're usually pretty busy. :-)


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you probably are not doing anything wrong...there was another thread here don't remember the exact forum....asking what percent of profiles on sls do you think are "real"......most cples were guessing in the 20% range...from what we have seen we'de put it closer to 15%...translation you will need much patience here...think about it...if those numbers are about right...for every 100 profiles you email or chat with about 80 of them are completely bogus.....and as always those chats that sound to good to be true most often are.

also be yourself don't buy the fabricated excuses why they repeatedly can't meet.....people earn a pass with us all the time...ok you got busy...we really do understand...but this is like baseball 3 strikes and yer outta here in our book....no we are not being overly agressive when you guys broke THREE dates and we become some what disenchanted with you. People love to blame others for their short comings...good self esteem is importent in the LS

New Hyde Park NY
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ran jen thanx for the advise I will b working on the profile and you are smokin HOT hes good looking too why do u have to b clear in FL :( My girlfriend moved back to FL too So if we ever get down that way we will try to look u guys up wont b anytime soon tho thanx again for the suggestions

Rantoul IL
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LOST thanx and the big boobs average penis was my husband being humorous lol since we had seen several profiles that had the size of the mans penis on them and I too figured everyone would realize we are not hermaphrodites but I guess I was wrong lol thanx for your comment

Rantoul IL
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tnt, i read your profile and I do not think it is bad at all. Like another couple said, you being smokers will cut down on your pool of playmates. I'm not judging you about it of course...but it will. I understood what you mean when you put big boobs average penis, btw. Noone will believe that you are a hermaphrodite. The only thing I suggest is perhaps adding a little humor to your profile. It is good and informative...but I think kind of serious.

San Marcos TX
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"Big boobs average penis." She has a penis? He has big boobs? Both have both?

I'd suggest you slide on over to the Better Profiles forum...

Mrs TF3

Saint Paul MN
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Stg Thank you for your reply any kind of advise we can get is appreciated.

Rantoul IL
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TOPIC: finding the right couple