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FORUMS › General Discussions › Swinger Advice › are we ever going to find someone
TOPIC: are_we_ever_going_to_find_someone
Created by: katybaby8 The original post for this thread was deleted.
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Patience!!!! We've been at this about 2 years, met about 200 people, about 50 we consider to be friends, and about 15 we've actually played with. We feel pretty lucky.

Mike & Jackie

Bedford PA
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never compromise on what you think you want.Usually thats when we all do not have the best adventure.

Sarasota FL
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Katy, I'm going to have to agree with the others; it takes time and patience. We've had a few experiences and each was unique. From your two posts, I think I'm seeing both a bit of anxiety and some hesitation on your husband's part. If the two of you are not at the same place with swinging, you may need to reevaluate your limitations and comfort levels. A lot of things sound really cool as fantasies but perceptions change when they happen. If you both are in agreement then just keep going, you are bound to meet people you "Click" with.

Carol Stream IL
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<<Are we being too anxious or too picky?>>

Maybe. Maybe not. When just starting out as "newbies," couples often make the mistake of being TOO picky (you just want to have fun with these people, not marry them!), or not being picky enough (you don't want to regret being with someone).

We ALL have played with couples that didn't turn out to be a good match for us. Just move on and try again, and learn from the experience. It's just as important to know clearly what you DON'T want as what you DO want in a couple to swing with.

And remember, neither of you should ever feel that you have to "take one for the team." If either one of you is not sufficiently attracted, don't go there.

Don't give up. Be patient, and refine your criteria for what you want and don't want. Then be very careful in selecting couples to contact via SLS or any other swinger site. Be sure they meet your criteria. Otherwise you will just be disappointed again.

Often the best way to find a suitable couple is to attend a local swingers' "Meet and Greet," where you can meet a whole bunch of swinger couples at once in a no-stress situation, since it's only to meet others and not to play. Alternatively, you may want to try attending a swingers' club. You can find clubs near you by clicking on the "Clubs" link on the left of your SLS page.

To find out about local Meet & Greets, click on the states portion of the Forum topics and read what's going on in your state.

Good luck! You are very attractive and if your husband is too you should have no trouble at all finding a large number of couples who will be interested in you.

You might want to consider posting at least one picture of your husband on your profile, too. Many couples simply don't bother with a couple if there aren't pictures of BOTH of them on their profile. Think about it. Would YOU want to agree to meet a couple if you had no idea whatsoever what the man looked like?

Wishing you the best!

Culpeper VA
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TOPIC: are we ever going to find someone
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