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When does 'interested' become 'pushy' : Swingers Discussion 2046031031
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TOPIC: When does 'interested' become 'pushy'
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kd, i think that is very good advice. I go to vanilla bars and guys touch the top of your back or arm when they talk to you.


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If you don't pick up on my cues, don't touch me anywhere, period!

Allenhurst NJ
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I have no idea how to ask a woman for permission to casually touch her. And most woman I know, if a man asked permission to touch her arm or shoulder, would either laugh out loud or ask WTF.

Belle Chasse LA
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im with what scandle said too


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I would just ask before touching. That way you don't get into trouble. I'm willing to bet if you ask respectfully you'll get a lot of positive responses.

Now if a woman starts the touching first, I'd go ahead and touch back. But I wouldn't touch the good stuff (T&A&P) unless the signs are REALLY clear (like she is grabbing your ass).

Kingsport TN
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TY, Scandle...that was exactly the sort of response that I was hoping to get. Point taken and obviously I'm going to have to study up on my non-verbal language skills. Over the years I've learned to speak spanish, german, japanese, korean, and a little english...but never non-verbal. :-) Will have to work on that. (LOL)


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Jack, Reading Mercy's description of what he does helped me define that is exactly what I like. A gentle touch on the hand or arm, a hand on the small of my back, as well as the look that indicates he finds me sexy. I don't like the bold and brazen approach of staring at my body parts incessantly or of fondling them uninvited. A look that indicates he likes what he sees, then primarily focusing on conversation will draw me in. If I am interested I melt into his space. If not, I step away.

Sheboygan Falls WI
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90% of communication is non-verbal. You better know how to read cues or you're not getting anywhere.

Whitehouse Station NJ
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The Mrs has (several times) commented on other ladie's 'cues' and asked me later why I didn't do anything about it when I hadn't even noticed. I suspect that I'm not the only M in that boat. I've noticed that ladies seem to be much more aware of 'cues' than men are. I guess that just leaves me and other M's in the dust, then. (smile) Sort of a "you should just know!" sort of thing?


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If the guy isn't picking up on my cues, I'm not going for it. He's not for me.

Allenhurst NJ
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TOPIC: When does 'interested' become 'pushy'