Vanilla Scene VS Swing Scene: Swingers Discussion 218012

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TOPIC: Vanilla Scene VS Swing Scene

Created by: ParagonStudly Original Starting post for this thread:
Hello everyone. I figured I'd kinda rant a little here.... While I'm not looking for a serious relationship at the moment or anytime soon, I signed up for plenty of fish and I've found that I've had more luck with meeting interesting people here as opposed to there. I've sent out messages to people on POF for a short amount of time, and nothing. Here, however, even if people are not interested, they actually reply with a sincere no thanks. And this seems to be the theme with vanilla places: the more open and honest you are about yourself, people shut down or change the subject in a quirky manner. On the flip side, I've been myself at meet and greets and only great things have happened. I am still in contact with my second ever couple, from two years ago, and they are nothing but awesome. The point is the vanilla scene, when it comes to being merely you, is a three ring circus filled with bullshit and bloated egos that deflate at the slightest form of honesty. I've had dates go well only to lead to that rude non-reply the next day forward. And I don't get it either. Which is why I have fully embraced our little lifestyle. It's awesome and I have tons of crazy stories to tell full of good people. Am I the only one who has experienced this same feeling??

Created by: ParagonStudly
Original Starting post for this thread:

Hello everyone. I figured I'd kinda rant a little here....

While I'm not looking for a serious relationship at the moment or anytime soon, I signed up for plenty of fish and I've found that I've had more luck with meeting interesting people here as opposed to there. I've sent out messages to people on POF for a short amount of time, and nothing. Here, however, even if people are not interested, they actually reply with a sincere no thanks. And this seems to be the theme with vanilla places: the more open and honest you are about yourself, people shut down or change the subject in a quirky manner. On the flip side, I've been myself at meet and greets and only great things have happened. I am still in contact with my second ever couple, from two years ago, and they are nothing but awesome.

The point is the vanilla scene, when it comes to being merely you, is a three ring circus filled with bullshit and bloated egos that deflate at the slightest form of honesty. I've had dates go well only to lead to that rude non-reply the next day forward. And I don't get it either. Which is why I have fully embraced our little lifestyle. It's awesome and I have tons of crazy stories to tell full of good people.

Am I the only one who has experienced this same feeling??

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User Details are only visible to members.	Dear Paragon, I have been in the "Alternative" sexual life style my whole life from swinging to bdsm and I have also been on all the vanilla dating sites. Sadly I have found more honesty with people on sites like sls then on dating sites. Lack of respect on vanilla sites is common on both sides of the fence. So far as responding, if they are like me other then the occasional bout of insomnia they probably don't have a lot of time to respond to every email. But if I go out with some one I do let them know if I am interested in seeing them again. I am brutally honest about that. Even sls isn't perfect. Of all sites where guys don't have to lie about wanting anything past fucking I have read tons of male ads stating they are seeking something real with a girl who likes to swing and when push comes to shove the only thing they want is sex. But the problem isn't the sites. In swinging you have to have respect for other people. In the community you build a reputation. You want to have a good reputation. Most people do in communities that are important to them. Swinging is important to people on this site. In the rest of the internet world we are all nameless soulless pixels on some one else pc screen. Technology while it brings forward many opportunities for us to share information and "connect," it is a double edged sword that brings anonymity and carelessness with it. Unfortunately if you are not a bar person or some one with a lot of time to go out and meet new people at different events, meeting some one even for a casual relationship is hard. So we have to rely on these sub-par tools ie. dating sites to try to find people to have a connection with. Despite the fact that I am on two dating sites atm, (one of them being pof as well) I have always been told follow your heart. I do that. I view the dating sites more of an online billboard for men who might be interested. I go about my business making plans rather then hoping and waiting for some guy to respond. Exotic
E Rutherford NJ			Username hidden (19 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Stick around, and watch and see in here. While swingers CAN be among the most open and honest people, there are also those who are the most narrow-minded and closed. Read the forums to find some of the answers you seek and have a good time. Welcome!
San Antonio TX			Username hidden (6045 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Hello everyone. I figured I'd kinda rant a little here.... While I'm not looking for a serious relationship at the moment or anytime soon, I signed up for plenty of fish and I've found that I've had more luck with meeting interesting people here as opposed to there. I've sent out messages to people on POF for a short amount of time, and nothing. Here, however, even if people are not interested, they actually reply with a sincere no thanks. And this seems to be the theme with vanilla places: the more open and honest you are about yourself, people shut down or change the subject in a quirky manner. On the flip side, I've been myself at meet and greets and only great things have happened. I am still in contact with my second ever couple, from two years ago, and they are nothing but awesome. The point is the vanilla scene, when it comes to being merely you, is a three ring circus filled with bullshit and bloated egos that deflate at the slightest form of honesty. I've had dates go well only to lead to that rude non-reply the next day forward. And I don't get it either. Which is why I have fully embraced our little lifestyle. It's awesome and I have tons of crazy stories to tell full of good people. Am I the only one who has experienced this same feeling??
Milford CT			Username hidden (42 post)

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TOPIC: Vanilla Scene VS Swing Scene

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