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UTTERLY pissed off! : Swingers Discussion 224829
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TOPIC: UTTERLY pissed off!
Created by: UKandUS
Original Starting post for this thread:
Can anyone give us a good reason to stay on this site, and continue to suffer the arseholes, dreamers and bullshitters? Just about had enough.

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Oops, a typo again...

*haven't interacted with*

Brooklyn Park MN
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LOL. First, I erred in typing the post- I meant to say women over 7'-0" were blocked, but I goofed.

Glad you recognized I was not serious. Most regulars know I make fun of a lot of posts. Having said that, I've decided that adding the :-) or :-D is important to make sure someone I have interacted with in the past didn't actually think I was serious.

Yeah, we can see your profile. We've only blocked those who have made a personal attack, or have consistently attacked others. I got banned once, for about 5 days about 18 months or maybe even longer ago, for responding to someone in kind. Now I just block and completely ignore that type.

Brooklyn Park MN
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Ok for those that don't recognize the previous history lesson, the Battle for Bunker Hill was actually fought on Breed's Hill. Molly (my wife in this story) Picture was said to be at the battle with her husband. She got the last name Picture because she carried pitchers of water to the dying and wounded men. Her husband was manning a cannon at the time of the battle and was mortally wounded (the guy laid behind the oak tree). Molly ran to the aid of her husband, but finding him dead took his place; helping to fire the cannon at the advancing redcoats (redasses or something like that). So that would put our ages at 258 and 255 respectively, but SLS will only allow a max age of 99.

I added the story to our profile and continued to snicker until Mrs Hottie got home. Proudly I showed her the story. Hottie frowned and said, "Well never get laid again." I was sorely disappointed, but I'm still laughing. Can you imagine something like this being acted out on Saturday Night Live (SNL). I guess I'll remove it after the incident stops tickling my funny bone ;-).

Cape Coral FL
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When I regained consciousness I found myself reincarnated into a little gnome of a person (I guess I still had some bunny genes) and I was dragging a huge, heavy burlap sack up some place called Breed’s Hill. At first I thought I was going to get lucky – Oh happy day! But instead I got a tongue lashing (not the kind I was thinking of) by this giant of a gal who instructed me to call her Molly. I was about to tell her my name when, she shouted “Over here powder monkey!” Soon everyone was shouting something similar. The good news I told myself that I was evolving from bunny to monkey and moving up the scientific taxonomy used to group and categorize organisms into groups such as genus or species. The bad news was that I sweating my genomes off dragging that burlap sack everywhere! I noticed and was relieved that the sack was getting lighter and lighter as folks fetched heaps of a black soil out of the sack. Weird, it didn’t smell like the great topsoil on the golf course; sorta rancid. The men, including Molly were stuffing the topsoil followed by heavy back seeds into planters on wagon wheels. I was contemplating this when all hell broke loose. Then I remembered the rancid odor and loud noises reminded me of that fateful day on the golf course. All at once it seem that everyone was calling for me, there were loud sounds, crashings, and screams all about me. I ran from one planter to another; keeping low behind the dirt wall. Being short can be a blessing! Most of the crap was going over my head. Then I heard Molly sobbing and crying my name: “Powder Monkey, please help!” I bounded rather then ran (bunny genes again) to Molly. She was dragging a young man behind a huge oak tree and I helped her lay him there. Some say he was her husband, some say he was her brother, others say he was her lover and a great “f**k.” Whatever. He breathed his last and Molly and I both ran sobbing back to the planter and burlap bag. She would shove the soil and seeds into the planter and the planter would make a great scary noise like the shotgun did. But she wasn’t afraid and just kept farming that planter and shouting at the redasses or something like that. We were working furiously. We were covered in black and there were streaks marking the routes of sweat all over our bodies. Just as I was giving the last of the top soil to Molly, I felt a fire burning my shoulder; then nothing. When I regained consciousness for the second time, Molly was soaking my hot brow with cool water. I was lying on a soft bed. There was a fire place with a pot over it making a sweet aroma. I had a bandage on my left shoulder. Molly was crying. I looked at Molly and cried too. We’ve been together ever since.

Cape Coral FL
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Here is what I was thinking:

A note about our ages and physical characteristics or how it came to be; and a warning about blue-eyed bunnies.

One day on the golf course searching for sweet clover, I saw the loveliest bunny in the world. The first thing I noticed about her was her azure blue eyes. She had the cutest delicate ears with black tips and an irresisterable backside. I bounded over to her, not directly, and not to fast; using my sexiest bunny hops; nonchalantly munching a clover ever now and then. Just as I got close enough to ask if she would like a carrot mojhito; I felt a searing pain in my side followed by angry blast! I toppled over her body spewing my guts out at her feet. She was hard and cold. Plastic. A decoy. Then I heard my mothers voice as the light dimmed, “My boy, beware of blue-eyed bunnies.”

Cape Coral FL
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Actually Goodenuff didn't block our profile. I think he was playing with me. You see our physical characteristics are listed as male 3'9" 68 lbs; female 7'3' 244 lbs. Not our actually stats. I changed them yesterday to what they are now. For a long time I've been looking at profile that listed ages of 99 and often they say age is not a factor. So I thought I'd try that, but list our ages so that I'd be 20 and she'd be 17 when the Battle for Bunker Hill was fought. That act started my mind reeling and I almost fell off my seat laughing. You'll find out later. Ok, another ridiculous thing should follow so I decided to reduce my height and weight to midget size and increase my wife’s to giant size. Now I can hardly man the key board because I’m laughing so hard.

Cape Coral FL
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Goodenuff blocked me too...I think he thinks I'm the one who ratted him out for his fake pics and got them removed

Rosemont IL
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I'm pissed Goodenuff! Apparently you have a thing for Mrs. Hottie_Biscuits since you blocked me, not her.

Cape Coral FL
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Just avoid the posers, fakes, Fora addicts, frauds, pic dumpers/collectors and bored housewives, cheating husbands and ESPECIALLY those caught with fake pics (see below)...and you'll be fine

Rosemont IL
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Since we blocked profiles if the man is under 3'-6" tall and/or the woman is over 7'-6" tall, we've seen a significant reduction in the number of unwanted messages.

:-D

Brooklyn Park MN
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TOPIC: UTTERLY pissed off!