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Question for couples: is it wrong of the other to pursue swinging even if his or her partner is unaware : Swingers Discussion 1997961055
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FORUMSGeneral DiscussionsSwinger AdviceQuestion for couples: is it wrong of the other to pursue swinging even if his or her partner is unaware
TOPIC: Question for couples: is it wrong of the other to pursue swinging even if his or her partner is unaware
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Is it cheating? It sure as hell is !!

Think of it this way, if he was meeting up with another woman behind his wife's back then it surely is considered cheating I'm sure by even his standards, so why would it be considered any different because it's with a couple ?

Philadelphia PA
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yes, this is in my opinion cheating...not swinging :0)


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If you don't have TRUST, you've got nothing. So don't do anything to ruin the trust. Either it ruins a relationship, or you'll be "fixing" it for years(decades) to come. I know people like that. And if you're doing something simply "without his/her knowledge" then you must know it's wrong, otherwise you'd have been up front about it.

Redford MI
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It is like changing the rules, in the middle of the game. You can't do that.

Carrie

Corpus Christi TX
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It isn't "swinging" if both parties don't agree, it is cheating . No Ifs, Ands Or Buts in my book. Hypothetically speaking when these 2 got married ,they promised to love, honor and cherish their partner, most would also include being faithful as an expectation. This isn't a case where he wants to take up golf and golf bores her and can not be compared to any other recreational sport. In my opinion he has a choice, to accept that swinging isn't something she is interested and get over it or find another partner. His wife deserves better than a cheating husband who sneaks off to check a swingers site for interest, arranges trysts that will put her sexual health in jeopardy and puts more energy into pursuing his sexual fantasies than the relationship with his wife. Does he deserve more than a wife unwilling to support his fantasy ? Sure he does if he desires it more than he desires being married to his wife. He wants his cake and wants to eat it too and in my opinion that makes him a very selfish not nice man. Mrs Sav

Anniston AL
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I like the incorrigible label! ;-)

White Hse Sta NJ
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sigh... you're incorrigible, AFT! And I like that! ;^D

Sheboygan Falls WI
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Agree that it is "cheating" but also see the point of the other spouse not being able to enjoy something they really like doing but can't! Very grateful we are not in that position. Thank you for all your comments it is an interesting topic.

Orland Park IL
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Depends. Is it the wife that wants to swing on her own and is she hot?

White Hse Sta NJ
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I completely agree with Carrie. To paraphrase and answer the OP, yes, "it is wrong of the other to pursue swinging" WHEN "his or her partner is unaware." It is cheating, plain and simple, and devastating to the relationship.

Sheboygan Falls WI
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TOPIC: Question for couples: is it wrong of the other to pursue swinging even if his or her partner is unaware