Newbies and fakers: Swingers Discussion 191675

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TOPIC: Newbies and fakers

Created by: CAROLINE6970 Original Starting post for this thread:
We are new to the lifestyle. We've chatted and emailed with a few people, but never met with anyone. We are going to a party on 12/03/11 though. We were messaged by a "couple" earlier tonight. And after about 5 messages they asked for pics. We told them our private pics were only face pics. We didn't hear from them again. Is this a common thing? I (Gin) am kinda wary of pics and the ones I have on our profile took a bit of courage and a huge amount of trust.

Created by: CAROLINE6970
Original Starting post for this thread:

We are new to the lifestyle. We've chatted and emailed with a few people, but never met with anyone. We are going to a party on 12/03/11 though.

We were messaged by a "couple" earlier tonight. And after about 5 messages they asked for pics. We told them our private pics were only face pics. We didn't hear from them again. Is this a common thing? I (Gin) am kinda wary of pics and the ones I have on our profile took a bit of courage and a huge amount of trust.

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User Details are only visible to members.	Especially the face value thing. Don't be fooled by pictures.
Avondale LA			Username hidden (4496 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Go as slow as you need, and don't worry about potential meetings. Meet people, take them at face value, and the rest may take care of itself.
Quakertown PA			Username hidden (1831 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	thank you all! I do have alot of 'personal' insecurities right now, and I know that's not a very attractive trait in the lifestyle, so I do appreciate every single post here. I feel that starting this venture at such an ancient age, not being anything remotely near my personal best, and not having any 'good' experiences under my belt, ...has made it harder than it should be. Yet i still hope and want to get passed it all and enjoy the lifestyle for all it has to offer! I appreciate all the patience too... lol. @ Joey, about this, ----"We are back in the game but right now taking things a little slower than most. We would like to meet, and get to know eachother a little before we jump into things" ---- I like that very much and it will make it clear to all who have no desires to take anything slow, to just pass us by. ...thanks for the exact words. lol.
Kunkletown PA			Username hidden (2981 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I think just hanging out with LS people is the best part of this journey. I look at sex as just a bonus. Now Mrs. Naughty on the otherhand loves the anticipation of play time. Damn am i messed up!! Im the layed back one and she is wild. Guess thats why im Mr. Nice and she is Naughty
Delta PA			Username hidden (124 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	lol. never expect shit from me. i tell couples and singles...you should show up expecting to fuck each other. if you expect that you will fuck me you may end up pissed off.
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23612 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Kind Not feeling comfortable with yourself does make it hard. My wife had gained a lot of weight over a short period of time a few years ago and it really put the brakes on things. She went from a bikini body, to quite large. I still wanted to swing and she played along for a while to make me happy. But secretly she was hating it. I didnt find out until later. She was not comfortable getting naked in front of herself let alone other people. We took a long break from playing with others. Unless you feel good about yourself, its no fun. She has since lost a huge amount of weight. She did it right. Diet and exercise and now she feels great. Men check her out again. She turns heads whenever she goes out. Now instead of feeling like guys were sleeping with her because she was willing. SHE now is in control and has her pick. And also can pick from guys who she would have been too intimidated to approach when she was heavy. She now is back into playing on her terms and she actually wants to. Im not saying youre in the same situation. But all I can say is if youre not 100% comfortable. Just dont do it. Dont do it to make your husband happy. I wish my wife had told me how uncomfortable she was while she was just trying to please me. If you want to stay involved and keep your options open without committing. Just say exactly that. "We are back in the game but right now taking things a little slower than most. We would like to meet, and get to know eachother a little before we jump into things" Something along those lines. There are lots of people who think that exact way. We are one of those couples that generally wants to meet and get down to business a short time later if we all click. However if a couple or single emailed us and said what I put in quotes.....We would totally understand and have no problem meeting and hanging out knowing that it may not end up in bed.
Mount Juliet TN			Username hidden (662 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Fun, that's pretty much the same as I'm talking about when we meet couple/couple. We have reasonable expectations because we've already covered the dealbreakers. But when it comes to parties, we have no expectations because we rarely find anyone we are interested in at parties.
Port Canaveral FL			Username hidden (3472 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	if you go with no expectations, you can't really be disappointed =========================================== That's no way to go through life.
Avondale LA			Username hidden (4496 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	"But what I think may have happened is that you talked about "it" to death. Let's face it, when you first start even thinking about the LS with your SO, it's so exciting! :) Very much like a honeymoon! But instead of getting out there and trying things fresh, your mind MAY have been a little preoccupied with all the different opinions you've read in the threads." ==== yes! ...it's so true! I feel I've seen/heard so much I'm done already! ...LOL! ...spoke with my husband, he's fine with stepping back and not making any committments I'm not comfortable with. We'll still go to certain kinds of events and will be sure to talk with the people we are all ready in contact with. If it's not okay with them, that's perfectly understandable of course!
Kunkletown PA			Username hidden (2981 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Okay, I'll be the one to come out and say it: When I go to meet a couple there is at least some expectation that I will be fucking her before all is said and done.
San Quentin CA			Username hidden (8604 post)

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TOPIC: Newbies and fakers

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