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Newbie seeks advice: What to do if partner isn't having a good time : Swingers Discussion 214561
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FORUMSGeneral DiscussionsSwinger AdviceNewbie seeks advice: What to do if partner isn't having a good time
TOPIC: Newbie seeks advice: What to do if partner isn't having a good time
Created by: beachlover668 The original post for this thread was deleted.
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Rowdy, You'll definitely know it when you see it. Swinging isn't a cuddle fest, it's a full contact sport. If we don't wake up the next morning with a few unexplained bruises, we probably didn't have a great time.

Virginia Beach VA
 
 
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I (male half) am pretty much the horn dog. I have not met a lady I cannot find a way to laugh with and enjoy. So she is the lynch pin for us in a couple on couple situation. She gives me our little secret signal then I start helping her out of her clothes..lol. It looks like I am in charge.

Rarely will we do a different room swap on a first encounter. I try to stay fully aware of her situation and am not shy about stopping or altering activities I know she is uncomfortable with. If we need to take our balls and go home because someone isn't playing nice, we do.

Glendale AZ
 
 
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My (male half) bottom line is whether or not Mrs. is having a good time. While neither of us will "take one for the team", there will obviously be situations where one of us isn't as "into" the other husband/wife as the other. It may be a little unrealistic to call a time out and have a "couples huddle" in the middle of play (maybe during a break in the action?), but we're pretty open about our feelings, usually afterwards on the way home. If either of us wasn't that wowed, we don't play with the other couple again.

This may be one of the advantages to house parties. If one of us is attracted to one half of a couple, then there's no expectation that the other has to play with the spouse. Plenty of other fish in the sea in this situation. Personally, I get off watching Mrs. have fun, and can easily take a break and enjoy the action if the situation warrants.

Tempe AZ
 
 
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if one of us isnt having fun we ask the other if they need a cigarette, then I (the guy) get us out of the situation. if one of us isnt having fun, we both leave nicely.

Allentown PA
 
 
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Sorry...meant to say dont do it again

Newborn GA
 
 
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Do you mean AFTER the "event" or DURING?

After - On the drive home, we talk openly and honestly about the night. What was good, bad, funny, weird, etc. And we decide if we want to go back there or not.

During - Take a minute for a couple's huddle and tell each other the truth. We had an experience early one where I was having a fairly good time and hubby was having a horrible time, but he didn't say anything and just stuck it out. (We were in 2 different rooms and I could only see glimpses of him.) I don't want him to go thru that ever again. Whatever marginal fun I was having is NOT worth his having a bad time.

Lahaina HI
 
 
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Find out what they didn't like and try to to do it again. We try to stay within visual range of each other. We pretty much can tell by expressions if somethings not right most of the time.

Newborn GA
 
 
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When I was a couple I just told him That sucked and we are not meeting them again, if he had fun then I would let him know he was more than ok to meet them if he enjoyed them. Upfront, open, honest.

Spring TX
 
 
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TOPIC: Newbie seeks advice: What to do if partner isn't having a good time