It strikes me as a little off that your "mentoring couple" is a single friend of yours that has a woman he swings with. Other than having more years in the lifestyle, i'm not certain how directly applicable their perspective can be given their marital status, or lack thereof. Perhaps my perspective is off, but I put it on par with getting parenting advice from an older divorced couple. Sure they might have more years parenting, but it's not from within the same set of parameters as my own. That being said, if you still have questions to pose for how to handle a situation, perhaps you still have need for a mentoring couple. Just my two cents.

Ahhh, nothin' like a little jealous drama to get the blood pumpin'... honestly, who even cares...we personally don't believe we need to clear anything with another couple if we're hooking up with their friends, I'm not sure the thought even crosses my mind...heck, the only person I need to answer to is my husband and I don't even need his "permission," lol...

Not to be insensitive but I would get over it. Yeah, the plan was such and such and they should probably have kept the plans but they didn't. I too would probably also be annoyed. However, they are free autonomous individuals and may associate with whomever as they please, I don't think what they did was egregious enough to hold a grudge. If you enjoy your friendship with these people you'll regret not getting over it. Just try to forget it and move on, to me this isn't biggie betrayal.

I agree Scandle, by this time East, you and your wife have been through more than a lot of longer term swingers have been. Sounds to me like you are ready to "walk the walk" all on your own. I also wanted to commend you on how well you took everyone's advice - whether using it or not depending on what worked for you - and responded. Sounds like you are off to a very good start!

EastTNCPL4U, here's one more thought from the peanut gallery. Since you have plenty of swinging experience under your belt, is it time to "graduate" and terminate the mentor/mentee relationship? It could be reborn with you both on equal footing, with no expectations of keeping each other in the loop about your liaisons.

Agreed "she" awesome perspective on this thank you! (and everyone else thank you!) :-)

could there have been a smiley face after your post?
if so.. yes, it's all that matters. lol!

well... as long as you're happy.

Great post She! ...and Thank You!

..see... those are the posts i like best! lol! :)

to the original post: you've received some good feedback here, but i would also encourage you to use great caution in assuming friendship with other couples. as in every walk of life, you will find people who people who do not always present themselves honestly. the people you work with, your neighbors, accquaintences from your gym you see regularly, and even people you will meet in the lifestyle. there will always be people who will present themselves in one manner while they need or want something from you, and once they either have it, or prehaps realize they can never have it, show you a very different side of their character. a coworker wants your support on a new project he/she is presenting to the the company brass. it's a schmoozefest as they attempt to garner your support. when you make it clear you cannot give your support, schmoozefest is over. not saying that your mentors are bad people, or that this is the situation with them, but do yourself a favor. do not for one minute think that there are not people in the LS who will try every way possible to take advantage of you. your mentors, since they are "mentors" probably should have at some point discussed this sort of thing with you guys because it happens all the time. there will be times, especially where group play is concerned, that certain couples will click with others in the group and make plans to get together again. had your mentors discussed this sort of thing with you, i doubt it would have bothered you as much. i think when the time comes, IF it ever comes, that you decide to discuss it with them, you might suggest that in their future "mentoring" endeavors, they might want to bring the issue up and discuss it a little more than they did with yourselves.