How do you keep your personal love life separate from the lifestyle: Swingers Discussion 102792

155
How do you keep your personal love life separate from the lifestyle: Swingers Discussion 102792

Busy Swingers Forum - everything you always wanted to know about swingers.

SwingLifeStyle Swingers Personal Ads. | SwingLifeStyle Swingers Clubs

Busy Swingers Forum

Everything you always wanted to know about swingers.

Create A Free Account

TOPIC: How do you keep your personal love life separate from the lifestyle

Created by: lik2lku2 Original Starting post for this thread:
Is there any couples that have been in the lifestyle for say 10-20 years that are still together now? Can your personal and swingers lifestyle be kept separate? And if so, how?

GoTo Page: 1 2

1 to 10 of 17

End

User Details are only visible to members.	Oh Heck yes! We celebrated our 37th anniversary last month, almost twenty years in the lifestyle, and even more in luv than when we first married. How do you handle both? Insure that everyone else is 'in addition to' and Never 'instead of'. Communicate and Listen to understand, repeat back and paraphrase for clarity. Give each other freedom lovingly and with trust. Always work together as a couple to enhance what you have, bringing good things back to your own relationship. If you ever find that something isn't working, don't be afraid to mutually change direction to something else. JnD
Fairview Heights IL			Username hidden (652 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	our lifestyle is our lifestyle so we do not keep it separate. we have been swinging for 9 years have owned a club for 8 years so most everyone we know, knows. Two of our children have had to ask what our schedule is to set their wedding dates.
Fort Collins CO			Username hidden (194 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	We are not even close to ten years in swing but what we have that works for us. Yes, we do have swinging friends that have becomes friends in the vanilla world and some that are not just for a booty call. But for us it boils down to us being open with each other on everything when it comes to swinging.
Howell MI			Username hidden (1620 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	The wife and I are going to celebrate our 16th year anniversary this summer. While we are not much more than softees (at least to date) and didn't really consider our activity a "lifestyle" until recently, we pretty much began our relationship in an atmosphere of shared sexual intimacy with other couples.
Nanjemoy MD			Username hidden (2045 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	That, and it just automatically opens up a new level of trust, commitment, honesty and open communication. Since we've been swinging, we've also communicated more deeply about other topics as well. I had a tendency to clam up sometimes, based on my past, and now I can come to Dan a LOT more easily and quickly, and don't let things build up in my head like I've done in my past. There is mutual trust, love, loyalty, and generosity. If anything changed in that regard, we would step out of this and address issues, but so far, that's not a problem for us, and we don't expect it to be. Gina
San Antonio TX			Username hidden (5609 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Not quite sure what you mean by keeping your swinger and personal life separate. We don't typically introduce our kids or family to people we swing with, but we have become friends in the non-swinging sense with some couples. In those cases we've had them over for a "normal" dinner. I'm thinking maybe your question is more about how do people keep swinging from interferring with their marriage. For us, when we've had marital problems, even minor ones, we stop swinging until we work through them. We figure this avoids any chance of interferring with our marriage. Each of us has had an occassion where we felt jealousy with someone the other was playing with and so we stopped meeting them. We also reaffirm our committment and interest in each other, but that's something we did before we started swinging. We have romantic sex only with each other. In essence, we don't mix issues of emotional fidelity and trust with swinging. I would think if a couple can't do that then swinging is a recipe for disaster. Scott
Madison WI			Username hidden (57 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Since the statistics show that 50% of marriages end in divorce, it would only be surprising if you had NOT seen a lot of marriages split up. But do you think swinging was the primary reason in any of those? Swinging intensifies the marriage relationship. Strong, trusting marriages get stronger and even more trusting. Weak, distrusting marriages are speeded along the path to divorce. If you are scared, then you need to approach this thoughtfully and carefully, and of course constant communication with your hubby about it is essential. Find out what you are comfortable with and what you are not, and decide together how to deal with the areas of discomfort. We have been swinging for 12 years now, and know only one swinging couple who split up, and swinging wasn't the reason. I wonder if it's an age difference. Perhaps couples in their 40s and 50s have already weathered the highest risk years. I really don't know. Jim
South Riding VA			Username hidden (8165 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	we have no problems. sex and love are not intertwined.
Lake Worth FL			Username hidden (7209 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	We haven't hit 10 years yet but will. We don't keep our lives seperate. The people we look for are those we can be friends with. Many of our friends bring the kids over for arts and crafts with my kids. Those occassions we aren't swingers just friends hanging out enjoy our families...
Bridgeport PA			Username hidden (12781 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Although it hasn't been 10-20 years for us, our love life was built before swinging was instituted, and the funny thing about it all is that we met on this site, so that is a no brainer for us. Jan
Johnstown PA			Username hidden (11995 post)

GoTo Page: 1 2

1 to 10 of 17

End

TOPIC: How do you keep your personal love life separate from the lifestyle