Age thingy,,,: Swingers Discussion 112659

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Age thingy,,,: Swingers Discussion 112659

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TOPIC: Age thingy,,,

Created by: Slitelyused Original Starting post for this thread:
I know a lot of cpls are uncomfortable with older cpls,,,I'm 74,,in decent shape,,,My spouse is 65,,a little larger than she's like to be,,I've been in the lifestyle for 30 wonderful yrs,,at what age should we satrt to hang it up,,we hardley get invites any more,,,parties are mostly 30's to 50 +,,,we feel like th seniors where ever we go,,,,I guess thats because we are,,,Be honest please,,,

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User Details are only visible to members.	talk about a bump
Augusta NJ			Username hidden (16075 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	We think the idea that it's "how old you seem rather than how old you are" is the best one. I always check age limits on profiles, but if we like the person we email and ask if they are firm on age. Probably they look at our profile and then decide. We have had both yes and no, but you can't find out if you don't ask. We have an over 21 on our profile for my personal comfort and the top we list is just a suggestion, we are not firm. Our age is always a source of surprise to us, not counting our knees, we feel very much the same about life, each other and the joys of sex as we always have.
Westminster CA			Username hidden (45 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Gina, thank for the compliments. :) You would be hard pressed to creep me out, now, in 2 years, or 5, or 10, or whatever. ;) I mentioned that bit in my last post simply to show the effects the 'age ID syndrome' can have, and how far wrong they can be (and often are). I never ask anyone I meet (even in clubs or whatever), and I really almost never look at it on the profile either. I just try not to get caught up in it, so if people want to post something that matches their appearance or personality (rather than their driver's license), that's fine, it's arguably a more honest and accurate answer to the question people are REALLY trying to ask when they want to know. I just try to ignore it either way. lol On the whole, it really seems we're on the same page. Now, if only we could get everyone else to join out party. ;) Derrick
Aston PA			Username hidden (366 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	goodkindofcrazy, You mean I only have a little over a year to make sure I don't creep you out? hehe. I liked your post very much. It showed such depth of thinking. Why even compare young/old? Sometimes I'll mention the "young guys" who show interest, mostly because "they" show a lot of confidence (and sometimes are overeager), BUT, I honestly could say that about any guy, regardless of age. I am so glad I read your post BEFORE I looked at your age. I hate when I place upon my own thinking a bias that really doesn't belong is isn't necessary! My sons are both intheir 20s. I have no qualms about having sex with men in their 20s. Or men in their 50s and 60s. It definitely depends on the individual man, my attraction to him and his to me, what's happening at the time, and just my "mood" perhaps. I can be attracted to any age, it really does not matter. I will say, however, that I respect and am drawn to maturity and intelligence. And that can come at any age...you don't have to have the numbers in order to gain the wisdom and experience. As my husband says, "it's not the age, it's the miles." So, maybe just as some of us can stop comparing the worth of fit people vs overweight people, we can learn not to keep comparing young with older, and just all take a person as an individual, be attracted or not, and give up some of this "fakeness" we see, which really is a factor of the fear that is felt by being honest. My weight and my age are both true factors about me on my profile, as is the profile itself and all pictures. I have no reason or inclination to lie about anything. If you're going to see me naked anyway, I really have no need to hide other aspects of myself from you. When I give, I give it all. Gina
San Antonio TX			Username hidden (5609 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Gee I don't know what to say to this idea of when to hang it up. If anybody can find partners, I don't think there is a reason to ever hang it up. Of course if you have trouble sitting up...He,he! I feel like my age issues -- I have a superhot 36 year old to hang with me in my mid 50's, are not about me as much as they are about other people. I understand, though how I might not be as marketable for a variety of reasons, and tick tock it is going to get worse. On the upside I consistently have more lead in my pencil than the young ones we know. There is a dark satisfaction to out-doing a young stud -- even if I would wish the best performance to him for my wife's sake and his. My wife can get 10 times the action I can -- did I say 10? I meant 100. She could leave me -- with the options she has -- in the dust and I like her on occasion to do that. But it is up to me to put myself in environments where I won't end up feeling bad about being bypassed for younger men. I still think young girls are the thing -- I know I should be ashamed of myself for being picky. If anything I will have to trim that preference. If it's any compensation, I am much smarter than I was even 10 years ago, and I have a very long list of lessons about what NOT to do or to expect. I have long ago made most of the stupid mistakes that make women roll their eyes about mens' behavior. I dare say in the moment it actually amounts to a grace -- I know I hurt less feelings and have fewer women that take me up on it that regret what they did. It was luck that got me the chance with the one I live with, but it is smarts and focus that has allowed me to keep her for 16 years. Getting old is definitely as they say much preferable to the alternative.
Brookhaven MS			Username hidden (153 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Interesting thread with some interesting points. I think one thing that can be gleaned from all of it is that age is a psychological thing, but almost always detrimental (to remember or consider). It's tough to fully or properly articulate, but basically, people use it as identification. Whether anyone wants to admit it or not, whether they want to try to invert it into some sort of a badge of honor or not, everyone is touchy about it, and everyone has preconcieved notions about it. Listen to someone tell you a story about someone they met, know, or played with, betcha 10 to 1 they mention the age, as if it had any relevance to the story. The older the people, the more they are obsessed with doing this. I can't hear a single story about someone my grandmother met without her telling me about how old she thought they were - even after I've told her I really don't care about such data. She can't help herself. It's a means of identification to her (and most everyone else). With it comes the notions of sexual ability, interests, intelligence, wisdom, stamina, physical attraction ability, and overall personality as well. Yet, time and again we see these issues aren't real. Even in this thread - "older" folks are finding predjudice against, and also kudos just for being, their age (and doing what they do) - both indicate the notion that once you reach a certain point you just don't do certain things anymore. - We see people turning potential playmates away because of a preconcieved notion about a number (too old, too young, too close to a son's/daughter's age, etc) - We see people so sensitive about their own number that they try to lie to themselves so that they can believe it's a positive thing - We see people getting upset that because of all of this, some feel forced to "lie" about their number - it's not because the posted number doesn't match their driver's license, it's because people feel that number MEANS something, and if they are told something other than what's on the driver's license, that they are with a "fake". (there is a recent concept of "real age" that differs from chronological, the idea being that they won't always match, perhaps they gave you the "real age", yet people still get upset with that) Here's my take - in a perfect world, we'd all just forget about our own, and STOP CONSTANTLY REMINDING OTHERS of _theirs_. I guarentee you we'd ALL be a lot happier. From first hand experience - - I've had people refuse to beleive that a face pic I've sent them was current, even when it was no more than a week old. - I've had people who didn't know my number suddenly think I was "immature" because I seem and act a lot younger than the driver's license told THEM I should act (nevermind I was actually more mature than they are when you consider mental stability and responsibilities) - Being part of society I am, unfortunately, a victim of it's taboos, so I too have a "creep out" number. For me that _was_ always 50. Yet both at work, and here on this site, I keep seeing women over that age that are quite appealing and I would actually quite like to play with. It just goes to show how meaningless, and even harmful all this obsession over a number is. Honestly, I think this site should remove that altogether. Let people make a determination based on profile, email, chat, personality and pics. (I mean, do you really card everyone you meet out on the street?) As they said in The Prisoner - "I am not a number! I am a free man!"
Aston PA			Username hidden (366 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Shells, there's nothing wrong with someone having an interest in a certain age group, just like any other interest. I'm just illustrating the point that age is just another factor like hair color, build, skin color. Some people seem to believe that age has a direct coorilation with sexual ability though...they think that you have to be atleast a certain age to be good at it, and if you're past a certain age you can't handle it.
Union Grove NC			Username hidden (954 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	mike its true what you say. But coming from someone who is picky to a liability, this is about attraction. Whether we like to admit it or not, we are to have sex with people that turn us on. For some personality is the key, to others intelligence. And to some like myself, I do take looks strongly into consideration, I'd be a lying ass if I said different. So yes, you take everyone at their own merit. But one is not wrong for choosing to play within a certain age demographic I think.
San Marcos TX			Username hidden (23651 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I like that saying
Fort Worth TX			Username hidden (8590 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I just saw a comment on a profile that said it better than any I've seen yet. "If our age is an issue for you, your maturity may be an issue for us." It is so true! As long as someone is old enough (legally) to deal with the consequences of their own decisions, and young enough to enjoy themself, that's all that should matter.
Union Grove NC			Username hidden (954 post)

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TOPIC: Age thingy,,,