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FORUMS General Discussions Straight Couples Full Swapping in separate rooms
TOPIC: Full Swapping in separate rooms
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Welcome to the forums, mcor. But wow, that was a post that reveals extreme mistrust. I doubt that is an issue for very many swingers. Swinging couples who don't trust each other won't make it very long in swinging, and probably not in their relationships, either.

People have all sorts of preferences that stem from all sorts of motivations. It depends on so many different variables that it's folly to generalize. In our case, for example, my wife just won't have an orgasm if there are others in the room whose sounds and actions are distracting to her. It has nothing whatsoever to do with trying to be sneaky about what we do. We also long ago gave up having "rules." We trust each other completely, so we know we're going home to our normal, routine, regular life no matter what we do with whom while swinging. What matters is our relationship, not whether she or I do something we usually don't when swinging. Swinging is all about novel experiences, and if two people decide mutually that it would be fun to do something, then go for it! Swinging is freedom, not chains that restrict what you do. As long as I know she's going home with me, and WANTS to go home with me, why should I care if she wants to do something in another room that gives her more excitement and/or pleasure? It doesn't hurt me, and besides, it only enhances the bond between us because of the gratitude we feel that we give each other the freedom to find maximum pleasure in a swinging experience.

Always remember that every individual has a different life experience and a different relationship and different preferences. Nobody's preferences are the "right" way or the "wrong" way. Just different. And Viva La Difference! If everybody were the same, we'd have quit swinging shortly after we began.

So tolerance of others' preferences is appropriate, and intolerance is not. I do think, though, that if your insistence on same room play is because you don't trust each other enough to play out of each other's sight, then you have a lot bigger issues than just whether or not you play in the same room.

Jim

South Riding VA
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First, let me say that we're comfortable with either same-room or different-room playing...whatever everyone is happiest with. Having said that, we've found that different rooms, with the doors open so everyone can hear, can be highly erotic. It's also much less distracting, allowing us to focus our attention on whomever we're with. She's had instances where the M she's with would spend so much time watching his wife and I that she'd start feeling slighted. We recognize that not everyone shares our preferences and that, for some, it can be a security issue too. Not to make a bad pun (I'd Never do That <LOL>), but "Different strokes for different folks!"


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To each their own, and you're right- some refuse separate room swap but we both just find it too distracting. It's the voyeur in each of us I guess.

Pulaski TN
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We can play same or separate room but it has always been same room. Some folks won't do separate and we really don't care either way. Also I can't say there has ever been a distraction issue. To be honest I get into it to the point I forget to watch Wifey getting nailed!

Elmira Heights NY
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There's an issue of safety in meeting the first time. Then in the bedroom he gets turned on seeing/hearing her giving & receiving pleasure. She likes seeing him perform, pleasuring another woman (knowing what it feels like). And she has a bit of an exhibitionism thing so she likes being watched.

When we have established a relationship we've both played separately.

Las Vegas NV
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As a single, naturally there are three of us together. A good share of the time, I am with the wife and her husband is sitting back watching or naked on the bed with us watching. Also, a good share of the time the wife is using both of us, either singly or in tandem. Yow!! :-)

However, sometimes, the husband will stick around for a while and just leave us alone together and go watch tv or something. I personally find that to be strange and it makes me nervous. I enjoy being with the wife alone and I can be more intimate with her, but I feel like I am cheating with his wife, or something....I guess. Don't know where THAT feeling comes from, but I prefer us all three to be there.

San Luis Obispo CA
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@tomanddiane

What about the 3rd round? lol

Emeryville CA
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Agree 4play, we've brought it up in other forums- finding 4 people who all "click" is nearly impossible.

Pulaski TN
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our fav is separate room play but we wont turn away because someone wants to be different from us. I have to admit though separate room talk afterward is always freaking hot!

Lost we have been doing the singles for a while now, really hard to find 4 people that all have the same attraction! Oh and I prefer chocolate ice cream but would like to sample your strawberry. I will even let you have the nuts... :)

Brownwood TX
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Those are some very neat ideas. I especially like that second round thing. One thing that we enjoy is the chat on the way home and the interesting pillow talk that we have after separate room play.

Pulaski TN
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TOPIC: Full Swapping in separate rooms