why does it always seem guys have to be involved: Swingers Discussion 947711011

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why does it always seem guys have to be involved: Swingers Discussion 947711011

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TOPIC: why does it always seem guys have to be involved

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User Details are only visible to members.	"Babe... you can be as gung ho as you want, but it aint happenin until I'm ready for it, so get with the program." Simple yet effective! Sometimes I can be a little verbose.
Youngstown OH			Username hidden (11415 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Nic!! that was such a freakin great example of how she could've started the conversation with her husband!!! She certainly owes you a video at the very least! ;) My version prob woulda been more like: 'Babe... you can be as gung ho as you want, but it aint happenin until I'm ready for it, so get with the program.' lmao...
Kunkletown PA			Username hidden (2981 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Speaking from experience only, but it appears to be very common - we find soft swaps a giant waste of time, for a few reasons - mostly the amount of time an effort put into it to pull it off, etc.....but for other reasons I will try and elude too.... pretty much every time the single female who joins us, they have other intentions rather than just a friends with benefits situation.....their intent is to have a real relationship with my partner, even after when explained everytime that wasnt an option that was ever on the table, and strickly explained by my partner and that is her wish..... but yet they try as they might and then find out the hard way, what happens they are shown the door..... getting back to the point im trying to make, it is never an issue with couples or full swap partners....... form our experience and opinion
Melville NY			Username hidden (31 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	We are still firming things up, so to speak...but you'll be one of the first to know ;-)
Atlanta GA			Username hidden (465 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Oh you little tease you! Now I will be thinking about getting that email! So have you set the date when this little soiree will take place?
Youngstown OH			Username hidden (11415 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	SOMEHOW, I had a feeling you might say that! lol We'll see...M and I actually had been talking about vidoetaping ourselves, or having someone else video us....videoing the shower wouldn't be too much of a stretch if we go that route...I'll have to check with my girlfriend that I'm planning it with, but I have a feeling she will be game.
Atlanta GA			Username hidden (465 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	You are very welcome, let us know how things progress.. And send video of the shower. lol
Youngstown OH			Username hidden (11415 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Nic, Nic, Nic, Nic..... THANK YOU!!!!!!!! I think M and I are so totally on the same page now! I'm so happy. A girlfriend of mine and I are tentatively planning a little shower show for our men...we'll see how it turns out...
Atlanta GA			Username hidden (465 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	I think the conersation could start like this: "I know you are really excited about the prospects of swinging and I will admit, I have some fantasies as well that I would like to expore together. However, I get the sense that you are ready to jump straight into the deep end of the pool and I would prefer to dip my toe in and see how I like it. I have read about couples in similar situations and the best advice seems to be, always proceed at the rate of the "slowest" person and since that's me, I would like to make a suggestion. I have read about hard and soft limits and a hard limit is something that we agree in advance that we will not change in the heat of the moment. I have to know that if I tell you I will not be with another man that you will respect that and not ask me to change my mind if we happen to meet a hot couple at a club. Can you do that for me? Now hard limits can change but only when we are talking about it away from a sexually charged situation. I am not saying I will never want the same things you do but you have to allow me to start slow and build up to it. It may not ever happen but I can tell you, if I feel forced or coerced into it, I will will stop altogether. YOU are more important to me than any fantasy and I need to know you feel the same way." Good luck and let us know how it goes. BTW, I have met several couples whose husband got them started but once the wife became comfortable and realized this LS can strengthen a good relationship, she was willing to explore more and more together.
Youngstown OH			Username hidden (11415 post)

User Details are only visible to members.	Nic, you give wonderful advice. I love my man, and I've been willing to meet him part way with this, that's how we wound up on SLS to begin with. We haven't even done anything, and I feel like all of a sudden part way isn't enough for him. I really hope I'm wrong. We do need to talk and haven't had the opportunity due to work, etc. I agree with you wholeheartedly about not wanting to wind up doing something under pressure that I would regret later. This is supposed to be something that might be fun and adventurous that we can do together, so how do I broach the subject of hard limits and soft limits? Any suggestions, anyone? I'm cool with girl/girl play, but if I wanted a different dick, I wouldn't be with him. That's just the way I roll, I guess.
Atlanta GA			Username hidden (465 post)

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TOPIC: why does it always seem guys have to be involved