Busy Swingers Forum - everything you always wanted to know about swingers.
SwingLifeStyle Swingers Personal Ads. | SwingLifeStyle Swingers Clubs

Busy Swingers Forum

Everything you always wanted to know about swingers.

Create A Free Account

HELP
FORUMS General Discussions Soft Swinger So sick of the BS
TOPIC: So sick of the BS
GoTo Page: 1 2 3 4
Start   19 to 28 of 38   End
User Details are only visible to members.
One problem we ran into with getting with soft swappers is that it seemed like every couple had a dude that wanted to fuck the other guys wife but didn't want anyone to fuck his. not just soft swappers but it seems like everyone who says they have rules breaks them immediately

Dyer IN
Username hidden
(451 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
The thread is about full swappers who say they're ok with soft swapping that really aren't. No version of our profile has ever illustrated clearly enough to full swappers that we were soft swappers despite our best efforts. For a while, we even had the words "WE ARE NOT FULL SWAPERS" written over and over again for five or six lines in the start of the text, and we'd still get people entering into communication with us that seemed shocked or upset after we talked on the phone that we weren't full swappers.

Here's how it plays out... It has been clear from every version of our profile what we're into and what we're not. Someone gets in touch with us and says they're interested in doing the things we like. Then when we talk on the phone and they start to ask about limits, they seem oblivious to the limits we've illustrated in the profile. They actually seem surprised we're soft swap and aren't full swap and then the conversation is over. Or... they say they're ok with what we do and seem very motivated to meet over several conversations that include our limits but then they change their minds and say they are really full swap and wouldn't enjoy playing at a lesser level.

Our frustrations are with people that say they are ok with our level of play but aren't. Even though we've tried and tried to illustrate what our level of play is limited to in all the versions of our profile, people never pay any attention to it, so we just wrote what we have now because the profile doesn't seem to matter when it comes to attracting people that we're looking for. It seems that nobody reads profiles.

Our profile is the way it is now to attract a certain type of swinger... the type that is interested in more than simple nudity and action. If that's all we wanted we could just proposition strange men and have all we could shake a stick at.

Bartlett TN
Username hidden
(67 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Doc_n_Janine, while your humor is not wasted on us we read your profile a few months back and found nothing wrong with it then (the old way)... but considering you guys live so far away we didn't think you would be interested. I guess what I'm trying to say is this, don't let the lifestyle change you... stay true to yourselves. It's been our experience that Soft Swap couples tend to be more "substance over style" than most folks, and we have always sought out those more interested in forming friendship if only to say "Good on ya'!"

WifeIsN2girls2, congratulations on your success! Your profile is clear, sincere, you show genuine pictures, you have a certification from someone that has met you and you're paid members... if that doesn't say genuine, I don't know what else does?!? We've noticed that you've only been members for a short while though, and while we certainly wish you the best we also hope you guys never experience the level of frustration or "B/S" others have seen.

Fairview Heights IL
Username hidden
(163 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Your profile is clear without being hostile, so I wouldn't expect it would bring trouble.

Look, I know that profile is dripping with sarcasm and wit, but most people only look at a profile for a few seconds before deciding on whether or not it's worth reading the whole thing. If you're going to spend those few seconds seeming like a jerk then it's not going to work out most of the time.

Windermere FL
Username hidden
(22620 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
We thought it was funny as hell to, but to be honest, we didn't read it all to even find out if it you guys were something we'd be interested in.

Maybe a clear delineation for when the sarcasm starts and ends might help with that. Maybe something like <sarcasm></sarcasm> tags.

Just a thought.

We have been incredibly fortunate in our profile. I mean, I'm sure that we get as many responses as we do mainly because of how hot my wife is, but we also get complimented on our profile alot.... so, I guess we just got lucky with out first one. We haven't had any trouble with pushy people, or people who expect more than what we are interested in.

Chesterfield VA
Username hidden
(104 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
It's not an objection so much as a "well, HERE's why you're getting the results you're getting." The profile reads like someone who's unhappy and has issues. I don't wish to decipher it all and figure out whether or not it is satire, analysis, etc. We're here looking for sex partners, not research fellows.

Windermere FL
Username hidden
(22620 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Vabeach,

I didn't think their profile was at all hostile. It was funny as hell -- at least the first three essays were.

In some ways, the profile is an intelligence test. If a viewer takes it seriously, I wouldn't want to meet them either.

You pass the test, of course, so it seems your objection is really to subtle intelligence tests. Or humor.

ST

Kitty Hawk NC
Username hidden
(279 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
While I don't disagree with your last statement, I'm not surprised most people won't bother to read the whole frickin' thing.

Good luck with your approach. It's working well for you so far, it seems.

Windermere FL
Username hidden
(22620 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Yes, we would write to us because we could see the humor, satire, wit and sarcasm in the profile and would be very interested in meeting someone that can mix those qualities with sexuality that would also be willing to play at our level.

If people can't see those things easily enough or tune out before they read enough of it, we're not interested in them. The mind is the sexiest organ of all...

Bartlett TN
Username hidden
(67 posts)
User Details are only visible to members.
Well, although I'm all for people reading the whole profile, you have one of the longest I've ever seen, and you need to read a *long* way into it before it's no longer hostile.

So you have three types of people viewing it:

1. People who didn't read it at all and just email you anyway. 2. People who began reading it and said "fuck it - these guys are a problem waiting to happen" 3. Other people with a chip on their shoulder who share your frustrations.

How many nice fish do you think you're going to catch with that stinkworm? A lot of "soft swap only" are new couples starting out, and they are going to be completely intimidated by your profile. There is a strong distinction between being clear and honest vs airing your frustrations out there for the world.

Think about it. Would YOU write to you? I sure as hell wouldn't. And we play with soft swappers.

Windermere FL
Username hidden
(22620 posts)
GoTo Page: 1 2 3 4
Start   19 to 28 of 38   End
TOPIC: So sick of the BS