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Age preference - a study of SLS friends : Swingers Discussion 1757741029
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TOPIC: Age preference - a study of SLS friends
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Just to add a side note to the thread; We belong to a group that limits membership to couples 50 and over. This group is fairly new, but already has in the area of 40 couples, all with at least one member 50 or older. This is encouraging, as obviously there's an interest there...but they won't attend any functions. We're a bit puzzled. If they have no interest, why join or stay? If they're interested enough to join and stay, why not participate? Any thoughts there would be very much appreciated. Perhaps the idea of putting a bowl of little blue pills next to the bowl of condoms is something that we should consider? (LOL) We've asked the membership about this as well as how we can make the group even more attractive for them, both in newsletters and in the group page, but nobody responds.

To comment on the posting from 'CuriousElders', it has been our experience (over a 17 year period) that everyone wants someone ten years younger than their own age. Sixties look for fifties, fifties look for forties, forties look for thirties, etc, and very few are willing to entertain the idea that anyone more than 2 or 3 older than themselves could be good company. I would suspect that playing with younger folk helps people feel younger themselves, while playing in an older age bracket reminds them of their own unwelcome aging.

Live long & Prosper! :-)

Jnd


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sorry...that is SUPPOSED to say something to the effect that i understand the issue of not being forth coming. typing is not my strong suit.

Knoxville TN
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april,

i understand not issue of keeping something from your play partner. i wonder...if you would have chosen to play if you KNEW ahead of time that there may be a performance problem. i'm not challenging you. just throwing out a question...curious as to the answers the questions brings.

Knoxville TN
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There's been some discussion about the little blue pill. Well, between our selves, we use the little blue pill when we decide we want to have a special private party with just the two of us. But we also use it when we want to be sure to satisfy our special friends. But often, things are spontaneous between us and we don't have time to take the pill, but we can still get it up enough to have a real good time.

South Bristol ME
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It isn't the easiest thing to admit to yourself that there is a NEED for the little blue pill. My understanding si that you don't always know that you've reached that point. You're just looking down asking, "What the hell happened?" Speaking for myself, I don't THINK I'm there yet. Have I had an issue or two in the past couple of years, sure. Was it because of age? I don't THINK so. But WHEN that day DOES come, no pun intended, I don't know that I won't have some trouble with shame or admitting it.

Knoxville TN
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Interesting data. My husband and I are both 69 years old and are still enjoying sex nearly everyday. With the little blue pill, my husband of 48 years can get it up and keep it up until we are both exhausted. We have to admit that we have only two couples with whom we play naked. Both couples we met here on SLS. We have as much fun now as we did when he first fucked me in the back of his '54 Ford 49 years ago.

San Antonio TX
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curious...it IS interesting that most of the swingers here on this site are older. not many in their 20s. when my partner asked about it, i guessed that maybe they may still be clinging the to idea of a conventional, vanilla relationship. haven't gotten to a point where they've questioned their sexual interests maybe...i don't know. BUT...so far when the two of us go to a party or club, everyone goes crazy for her. they want to know how i got someone so young and beautiful. i don't know if this means that those of us over 45 are still attracted to the younger person or not. i don't think i have any answers here. just thoughts that lead to more questions. sorry if i sound unfocused. typing as i'm thinking without having thought anything through.

Knoxville TN
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innervision raises an interesting question that didn't occurred to us - do older swingers rule out younger swingers? It depends who you ask. My wife has signaled a younger age limit - no one younger than our children. Mine is 45; ours is 32. Hmmmm. In fact, our preference is for folks over 50 partly in deference to her wishes, but I can't say that our brackets are firm. We didn't target any age group, but tried to reflect our amusement at how many folks would prefer to mix it up with younger people or those only slightly older than themselves. But if those younger people felt the same way, they'd be out of luck.

South Bristol ME
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very interesting report. i'm trying to make sure that you're not suggesting there is something wrong with having a younger partner so much as it is you suggesting that we don't rule out the older swinger so quickly. your comments are targeted to older swingers or younger swingers? or just the idea of generating good conversation? either way....very interesting topic. something that has been on my mind lately.

Knoxville TN
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For older swingers, age is an issue. Since we are at the upper end of those participating in the lifestyle, we decided to look into the matter. A few years ago we looked at the preferred age bracket among the seventy-nine SLS couples we had as friends. It is clearly not a random sample simply because we selected them as friends for one reason or another and not for age, however, we tend to stick with folks over fifty. We compiled the data and this is what we found.

The average age of the men was 55.6, and for women of the couple, 54.0. The age range for men was 48 to 69; for women it was 48 to 65. In summarizing the age preferences of this group, we took the average age of the couples, 55, and the average of the lower and higher age limits. What we found was that was low end was 17.4 years younger that they were (about 37) and the high end was 8.3 years older than they were when they specified a limit (about 63) - a definite bias toward youth. Data for the high end was inconclusive because ten couples used an upper limit of 99 which a couple we met told us that it meant that there was no upper age limit.

None of this should be surprising since it is well known that sexual vigor, if not the desire, tends to diminish with age. Accordingly, those interested in sex with others will seek out those in whom the juices are still in full flow. A closer look at our sample reveals some subsets with differing outlooks.

There are ten couples who have no upper age limit. For two couples, the low end of the bracket is a 21, which means that the age of their partners is irrelevant. For other it varies from a few years younger than they to quite a bit younger.

The majority of the couples favor ages about 15 years younger to about 10 years older - a reasonable range.

Ten couples like to have partners who are anywhere from about 12 to 26 years younger than they are, but limit the upside to couples less than five years older than themselves. We are bemused by these folks who are willing to mix it up with a much younger crowd, but don't entertain folks much older than themselves. We think this is reflective of an inflated ego that would not be of interest to us.

As the lifestyle community expands, we feel there is a place for older swingers that is presently lacking. We do all we can to demonstrate that sex is rejuvenating and invigorating. Our experience is that it is the older women who retain their enthusiasm, interest and sexual capability well into their sixties and seventies. The pharmaceutical industry has come to the aid of the men who would otherwise have called it quits.

Although many swingers may think that they are God's gift to those younger than themselves, the elders among us can demonstrate what is in store for younger folks as they age. We will make optimists of you. Give older swingers a try.

South Bristol ME
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TOPIC: Age preference - a study of SLS friends