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FORUMS General Discussions Senior Swingers AARP crowd***Happy thought of the day
TOPIC: AARP crowd***Happy thought of the day
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HT>>> I'm back from a 4 day weekend with wonderful SLS friends. It was awesome. Now catching up on my SLS reading with you wonderful folks.

BREAKING AND ENTERING.>>>

A burglar broke into an 86 y/o woman's home. He tied her to the bed and had sex with her. He then started collecting her valuables.

He had sex with her again and then collected more valuables.

After having sex with her again he ransacked the house and said "Ok lady, where do you keep your cash?"

The little O'l lady said: "Young man, I don't carry cash. But, if you will have sex with me one more time and untie me, I'll write you a check."

Seguin TX
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Justifiable homicide:

Your honor, I am 86 years old.

So here I am,sitting there on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sits beside me.

He starts to rub my thigh, and it feels good, Your Honor. So I don't stop him, and he begins to rub my old breasts, Your Honor.

Why, Your Honor, I haven't felt that good in years! So I just spread my old legs and say to him, "Take me, young man, Take me!"

He yelled, "April Fool" and that's when I shot the Son of a Bitch

Kernersville NC
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good one Kelly..... I was a lifeguard for a summer....it was sexually intense

Rockport MA
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Beach Trip Anyone ?

Martha and Betty were at lunch in their Senior Living facility. Martha turns to Betty and asks, "Do you still get horny?"

Betty replies, "Oh sure I do."

Martha asks, "What do you do about it?"

Betty replies, "I suck a lifesaver."

After a few moments, Martha asks, "Who drives you to the beach?

Kernersville NC
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Kelly I glad you donot have no curtains<I wish I lived near you.Have to come over nude to your home asaking for some sugar.

Belmont NY
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@KJ I'm with you. I live in the woods and no drapes. Matches my hair. I'm bald.

Ike and Mike (twin brothers) had been hanging out at a construction sight fence watching and listening to the workers there.

One evening during dinner the father ask Ike: "what dish can I pass you son?" Ike said: pass the fucking beens Pops". POW....Dad slapped the kid and said: "Go to your room, NOW"!!!

The father then ask Mike: "What would you like to eat son?'

Mike said: "You can bet your sweet ass I don't wan't none of them fucking beens"!!!!

Seguin TX
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great name for a rock band....Thanks Tigg!

New Orleans LA
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ooooooh a hot woods nymph :)

Rockport MA
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Why TIGG you sweet talker you..... do my own hair and I live in the woods so no use for drapes LOL

Kernersville NC
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Kelly did rabbit do your hair and does the carpet match the drapes

Rockport MA
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TOPIC: AARP crowd***Happy thought of the day