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FORUMS General Discussions Safe Sex Condom apathy and erection issues - pet peeve
TOPIC: Condom apathy and erection issues - pet peeve
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ohhboy46, You brought up an interesting issue. Letting lust get the better of someone cause of not thinking straight at that moment. He may have been unhappy, but she would have had to worry about things afterwards which is NOT worth the price.

What are others thoughts about males tricking females by selfishly removing the condom without permission in the middle of play even though they were told no unprotected sex several times?

Fort Worth TX
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" And I saw men go from woman to woman to woman"

I have been to places where those "puppy piles" have happened.

One night at a pool party there were two piles of about 25 people each. I sat back and just watched the transfer..

This same party at a home had a SMALL hot tub. It would fit 4 people max. I watched as the water became fetid over whelming the sanitary conditions. I swear you could have gotten pregnant in that water.

Most folks only deal with one or two couples at a time. Transfer risk is less obvious.

I don't get paranoid about it unless my gf is present. She is fertile and I watch very closely to make sure no semen gets into her.

The reality is we still have fun. One way I keep her safe is to have her get on her hand and knees with her feet next to a wall. Then I can close my eyes knowing no one can sneak up behind her...smile. She has a GREAT ass. ;)

I'm much more relaxed if I'm by myself.

Mischief is off to the Trap in Hotlanta not this weekend but next.

Glen Burnie MD
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It's important not to get caught up in the moment so much that you ignore rules...especially your own. I agree with Mischief...I'm LOUD about safety and it can kill the moment...not MY problem, tho. In fact, I'm loud so that ideally it won't be MY problem.

Cocoa FL
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I have encountered issues with condoms and erections. The one poor man omg had a latex reaction. OMG. That is NOT the place to get an allergic reaction ha. I think the older generation has issues with them more than younger men. Number one, single men are used to wearing them often where husbands don't wear them with their wives so they just aren't used to them. I have had men tell me that they "train" their cock so to speak by wearing them for like a month even with their own wives. This gets them used to the things. I can't imagine they are comfortable haha but they are necessary. Raven in regards to safety and carelessness....OMG you are right. We went to a house party once just because our friends were hosting and wanted us there cause I was on my period. So its this huge group orgy and we are sitting there kind of watching........and my mouth is gaped open. I could not believe what I was seeing ha. This was not a small, intimate group of people who knew each other. This was a pretty large group there in this living room. And I saw men go from woman to woman to woman......I was like fuck snap. Anyways yes we have to take charge over the safety of our own bodies and not assume that others are the same.


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"It is because of reading your postings over the years that I have become more aware of safer sex practices other than condoms. You influence many that say little, but pay attention babygirl! "

I really appreciate that. I sincerely try to enlighten the masses about all the areas that most folks are lax in. This is why things (herpes, HPV) are soooo everywhere. I think like a medical professional not a chick out on a Saturday night.

I have tried all sorts of safer sex practices...just to try them out. Most I have discarded as unworkable, no fun, or more bother than the risk the appear to control.

Currently, I merely use condoms and don't move my hand from one woman to another. Left hand is mine and right hand is the other ladies hand. If I am really busy. I wash with either Purell type lotion or soap and water. Purell doesn't require me to get up. A large plus.

Smiles. Very much like your posts too.

Mischief

Glen Burnie MD
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Gina, When guys start to get weirded out cause they can't get hard I tell them to relax and let it go. I'll hand them toys and hopefully they will relax and enjoy enough to ease it off their mind. The more stressed they get, the more it isn't gonna happen. I'll continue to give them attention here and there in hopes that something will come up (: I'm extremely patient and would never say anything that could cause any problems. There's always another day!

Drinking is very much part of the problem for some males. Why they do that to themselves is beyond me.

Fort Worth TX
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The drinking seems to be the biggest issue, esp. at hotel parties.

If it happens with a male partner, we just do other things, no big deal to me. I can always get fucked hard later with Dan! Or then, or whenever I want...

My point is usually to not let the guy feel bad about it, so I just shrug, say "that's ok," we can try something else, esp. if he feels like he should appologize. I'd much rather he appologize for cumming too fast...hehehee...but that's just me.

Gina

San Antonio TX
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Mischief,

Thanks! I will pick up some cock rings next toy store visit (: I had a male roomy back in my 20's who loved using them. Can't deny I enjoyed the hell out of them too. *blushes* That's something that is not in my already over-flowing toy bag. *chuckles*

It is because of reading your postings over the years that I have become more aware of safer sex practices other than condoms. You influence many that say little, but pay attention babygirl! I've learned a ton from you and appreciate/look forward to all your postings. Keep it up please!

I'm not sure I'm ready to do the dental dams. I've considered it though... I've started asking bluntly if condoms will be an issue on maintaining an erection. Funny how everyone I have asked so far has said no. LOL!

I decided to make other plans for this weekend. I haven't been able to relay my thoughts to the host yet so la vida se enciende!(life goes on!)

Fort Worth TX
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Suggest some jelly or silicone cock rings over the condom...to keep the erection viable. I have the same problem. It amazes me who sloppy folks really are. They "seem" to use more up this way..but them I do screen them fairly well. I, too, always have a small bag with at least 2 sizes plus non latex, nitrile gloves, and a lollidam.. smile. That's one thing I don't use... Oral sex coverings...

Mischief understands your situation...

Glen Burnie MD
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I've tried joining different groups of different sizes to see if it was just the people I was meeting, but it seems to be in all groups around me that I have met so far. I’m sure there groups that are safe sex friendlier, but I haven’t found them yet. While these smaller groups (house parties and individuals) think/boast they are safer and can go without, members also play on the side without which makes their lack of condom use a huge issue for me in more ways than 1. They are NOT safer! You would think condom use would be common practice in a big city, but it doesn't seem to be here.

I've run into the problem at the swing clubs I've visited here. The local swing clubs is where I tend to encounter the ones that try to trick me most often. You are lucky to find wipes and towels on a consistent basis to clean off the play areas after someone has used them so I have to bring my own. Learned that the hard way ): Fortunately they are accepted at the on-premise clubs in DFW which makes them the safest and most fun place(s) for me to visit. The Minx keeps them out in every room in the house so less of a problem with others using them there and being able to maintain an erection. The Minx also keeps a few bottles of Slic Plus, wipes, towels, extra sheets, ect. on hand which makes me feel better. The problem with the Minx (my fav) is it is quite a distance from me (approx 120-130 miles round trip) so I don't go there very often. I haven't visited the other on-premise club(s) in DFW to date to know what their practices are exactly, but they aren't much closer.

I keep a huge supply in my bag of all sizes and yeppers... it's common for the guys to say I forgot to bring some. Tells you something! I always keep them at arms reach and do the "gotcha covered!" statement. LOL! I also keep several toys handy and find I’m now relying on them way too often for satisfaction when I play.

My pet peeve isn't totally related to lack of condom erections... it is the lack of safe sex practices altogether. I'm on the constant lookout for other practices that are just as unsafe. Hand to hand, mouth to mouth transfers, ect. I use Slic Plus and a Hospital brand wipes that is made to help fight STDS. You should see how people react when I ask them to use them. I can somewhat understand why people who aren’t concerned would rather play with those who aren’t concerned too. You would be amazed at how many I’ve recently met that can’t remember the last time they were tested or what they were tested for. I’m starting to feel obsessed.

I've been invited to a house party this weekend and am concerned that I might be the only one there that requires condoms once again. I plan to talk this over with the host and tell them my concerns. Thing is I'm expecting to encounter this again at the party because I already know not everyone in their group (if any) uses condoms. Sucks that I've encountered so much of this in my area that I’m already expecting to encounter this problem at the party too. Maybe I'll be surprised and meet a male that interest me that can handle wearing condoms??? At least I know my date can (: My date yesterday couldn't perform because of my condom requirement (yep, he forgot to bring any too) so once again I was in the same situation. ToysRUs! I’m wondering why guys make dates with me if they already know they can’t perform covered? I don't think they would be so forgetful about bringing condoms too if it was more of a practice here.

Fort Worth TX
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TOPIC: Condom apathy and erection issues - pet peeve