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email that changed my life : Swingers Discussion 40217
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TOPIC: email that changed my life
Created by: wifefirsttime
Original Starting post for this thread:
Hey Everyone, I woke up this morning dragging my butt out of bed, as usual. Find out older daughter's school closed because of flooding, baby screaming to get out of his room, brother calls "just to say hi" and hubby wakes up trying to decide if he's going to leave me a vehicle in case I need to go out somewhere. I sign on SLS to get my "forum update" and find an email from a new person. I think "okay, maybe my day will get better from here". Open the email to find two words "your fake". First I get frustrated. The correct english for this sentence is YOU ARE FAKE, or YOU'RE FAKE. I've never spoken to this person or even had any communication at all with this person. First reaction of course is I'm pissed. IF I'm fake, that means I don't exist. If I don't exist, who woke up with the rest of the house here? Who had to run to answer the doorbell because her daughter didn't bother checking for closings? Who had to rescue baby out of his room? Who had to answer the ringing phone? (oh wait, if WE'RE fake, hubby is fake too, so I guess HE didn't answer the phone) Who came back downstairs to feed baby? And who actually opened that email to find out "we're fake"? As long as I don't exist, I think I'm going to go back up stairs, run a nice hot bubble bath and not be bothered by the kids screaming at each other, or the baby screaming because puppy is chewing his one of his toys. It is soooooooooooooooooooooooo wonderful to be informed that I don't exist. Maybe I can enjoy some of my non existence now. I would end this here, but I don't know who it is that is typing. Is it live or is it memorex?

Lora

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'It doesn't happen all at once,' said the Condom Skinned Horse. 'You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who don't swing often enough, or have no certs, or who have to be carefully kept so they don't post pictures. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby and nobody wants to have sex with you . But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand. Once you are real age doesn't matter, preferences do not matter, sex appeal is irrelevant. All that really matters is a bunch of people gave you a cert and now you are REAL.

I think I'll become a fake .

Anniston AL
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How about a human serve yourself buffet..... I'll cover myself with the lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, olives and salad dressing (skipping the onions). Who wants to be the main meal and dessert?

Lora

(keeping a spare nutcracker in my mouth..... hehehehe)

Pittston Township PA
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cindee,with utensils we wing it ,whatever and however they can be used, can find a use somewhere.Taking off the thong is for the tongue and fingers.Could be used just for the iamgination of what could happen if your a bad girl.now wheres that rolling pin. hmmmmmmmmm whats this ,a turkey baster........a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down

Sarasota FL
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Tongs to take off my thongs.... hmmmmmmmm... that could be extremely erotic. Ice up the wooden spoon, heat up the metal spatula..... hmmmm... now I'm horny.

Lora

Pittston Township PA
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NJ.... I have heard of George Carlin, and knew you were trying to be funny. It was. I was just putting a different twist on it.

Lora

Pittston Township PA
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could care less if they know how to use a knife or not ,would never think of a knife in anyones hands while havign sex is a play toy . anyone else that likes it is fine and they can do whatever they wish to do or use. Not thong wifey tongs..hoping that the thong would be off anyway

Sarasota FL
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Expo.... chocolate syrup is in the fridge next to the milk. Whipped cream is hiding in the cheese drawer away from kids eyes. Frozen hot dogs are in the freezer. And the thongs are in my underwear drawer.

Cindee.... if you even look at me funny while holding the butcher knife, I'll tie you down on the table with dish cloths. (I might enjoy that more than you would)

NJC....you can think all you want, but you need someone else to think you are thinking in order for you to be.

Pa..... I'm online long enough not to let things like this bother me. What I did think was funny is that the person, and I use this word loosely, is not only a free memeber, has no pics, lives only 10 minles from me (why try to screw with people that are close to you unless YOU aren't looking for playmates) and is recent to the site. I wouldn't be surprised if it was an ex boyfriend just trying to piss me off.

I didn't let it get to me, but wanted to do SOMETHING about that email. Of course, I wouldn't bother replying, and why bother sending this to Tech, he has enough to deal with. What other way to get it out of my system but to post a forum thread about it.

I should actually be happy that I woke up to mail yesterday. I'm actually happy that I woke up yesterday morning, so anything else doesn't really matter.

Lora

Pittston Township PA
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no need to hide the knife . thats not a play toy now the spatula and the tongs would be. looking for hersheys chocolate syrup

Sarasota FL
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<--running around the kitchen naked to hide the butcher knife!!!!!

Pittston Township PA
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well how about proping up on the kitchen counter... wheres that spatula, perhaps the stove for simmer. weg .......... who cares where as long as naked enters the equasion

Sarasota FL
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TOPIC: email that changed my life