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FORUMS General Discussions Open Forum What are the things you can see or not see in a profile which will make you automatically decide not to swing with someone Also what can you see which makes you want to
TOPIC: What are the things you can see or not see in a profile which will make you automatically decide not to swing with someone Also what can you see which makes you want to
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Like so many others on this thread, our turn-offs include lack of pictures, profiles that offer no real information about the personalities of the couple, and the absence of punctuation or standard grammar in the profiles.

We are drawn to profiles that are clearly a reflection of the personalities behind the words. We don't mind pictures that don't show faces, as we understand the need for discretion, but we definitely are drawn to people who have lots of pics uploaded, even if many of them are private. (We figure that the couple probably has fun with the camera, but wants to reserve sharing for those they feel they've gotten to know a bit better; this is definitely the case with us.)

Clovis CA
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Well, this is a good one, hmmmm, let me see....well someone said something about pics where the kid(s) was cut out of the photo, yes definately yucky! To add to that, and this is just me personally, any pics of their pets with them on the profile....don't ask! i don't really know but it's just not the place for those "kids" either!....just don't wanna see Sparky in the photo, that's all.....i guess because i work with animals and i just think that they should have some sanctity as well.........again, this is just me.......and also profiles with no pics, very short profiles that don't really say anything at all, or only pics of the down below regions, stupid one liners like " fuck us tonight" that kinda stuff....no one is perfect, but come on folks, is that all you can come up with????

Burbank CA
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Ewww factor for people who have photos where a child was obviously in the frame but they've blocked them out. Pathetic.


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Turn Offs: Only pics of the female (makes me wonder what they are hiding) one line answers cursing in the profile

Turn ons: witty profiles at least a few clear pics when they write, they actually open their pics to you, instead of having to ask. I think if you are the initiator of an email, you should open yours to the ones you are writing. =) I can understand waiting to see if you get an initial respsonse like"great profile, thanks for writing and lets get to know one another, but don't let it go on forever. Just my opinion =) C

Piedmont SC
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Things in a profile that attract our interest: A paragraph or two under each topic - not just a few words or none at all, good grammar and spelling, complete sentences expressing a well thought out statement of interests, enough information to feel that we might have something in common other than a love of sex, a warm and friendly tone, pictures of both the man and the woman - not just genital shots, but pictures from which we could recognize you when meeting at a restaurant.

Things in a profile that destroy our interest: bad grammar and spelling, little or no information that tells us anything about the people/person, a hostile tone or one telling us that we MUST be this or that, absence of pictures of both the man and woman, or pictures that are just genital shots.

South Riding VA
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turn ons...... people who say with few words what is needed to say.I do not want to read a novel.1 or 2 paragraphs at the most is all that is needed. Those that speak of both the male and female on a couples profile. Those with very few rules, hard when you have to look at a scroll to see what can be done or not done. Those that the dos are more then the don'ts usually means they are more positive ,friendly ougoing and accepting. Funny ,witty, creative,spur of the moment couples,daring. people who say whats on their mind then what they think others want to hear. Turn offs ............................ when they describe the body types they do not want to be around. Its their way or the highway, which means bossy ,unaccepting of other preferances. Novels that say how much they won't do,prefer what they do, then the negative. Those that try to convince you to like them. Racial statements

Sarasota FL
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It would seem that the majority of people here have the same dos/don'ts. Ours are not much different. Our profile is fairly Lengthy and tells you what we like. We rarely write others, we prefer for them to look at our profile and determine if they are interested. Some of the things we do is We ask that you read our profile in its entirety. We have a greeting that we ask a person to place into the subject box. If you send us a mail and it is not there, we will not respond. We ask that a person not ask for photos, we will not send them and tell everyone that. We ask that if you write to us and your photos are private to open them. If they place one in the bottom of the mail we will respond in kind. We will not open ours till the person contacting does. We want to see photos to determine if there could be a connection, however; we do not make our decision based solely on photos. There are those who don't photo well, and we want to meet them not their photos. So we meet at a restaurant or bar and get to know who they are and decide what we think they are. Does that mean every single person that writes us we meet, no. We use the entire package of the profile to make the determination. Do we believe that people are judgemental, yes we do. We can use semantics with words but it still is a judgement. People are who and what they are and we are not going to change them, nor them us. So we let things fall as they may. We hate when someone sends us a message that says "loved your profile check out ours" and when we do there is nothing there or have one sentence. The profile is there for others to get an understanding of who they are and go from there. We have found that those who do that usually base what they have on their photos and looks. That is their choice to do that but we feel it shows how vain they are. We also hate messages that take a couple readings to understand what was said. Spelling and grammar are important to us, others it doesn't mean anything, for us it does. Everyone has their own desires, likes, dislikes and preferences so we allow things to progress in a manner that those contacting us want to meet us.

Allentown PA
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Turn ons: Good pictures of BOTH people, enough information to know what they want/like and what they are looking for, and information that indicates they have either been swingers for a while or are very confident newbies. Hubby especially likes photos of a shapely behind.

Turn-offs: People who have a zillion rules about whatever, sound bossy, or you can tell they think they are God's gift to swingers.

I think most people here sound pretty normal. That's always a good thing!

Jen

Reading PA
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Will agree with you all the way Poly, until the last phrase, as we don't judge people on their lives, color, race, religion political beliefs, all that crap; we do have our preferences as to what we like but don't judge others on our preferences, likes or dislikes. We truly believe there are a few of us out there that truly do not judge others, and unfortunately I especially was born and raised with that moral belief, never judge anyone, ever.

Jerome PA
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Turnoffs: People who don't have the decedency to take 5 secs to click a button to respond to an email; pictures of the woman only or a very small pic of the guy; paid members who can see our pics right off the bat and have theirs all locked and then ask for us to unlock our private pics and send face pics (still trying to figure that one out) before they will even let us see them; people who require that you keep your face pics on this site; people that are new with incomplete profiles, the list can go on forever as we have been on this site since it began.

Turnons: Pretty much the opposite of above: Non-judgmental people; people who respond to email; people who supply pics of BOTH; people that are free and easy-going and happy in life with no hangups, especially about keeping face pics on this site; and the best--people who will actually meet if only for a drink, who aren't afraid to take the step.

Jerome PA
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(12139 posts)
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TOPIC: What are the things you can see or not see in a profile which will make you automatically decide not to swing with someone Also what can you see which makes you want to