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TOPIC: WTF
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Don't stick your dick in crazy, and don't stick your dick in....

NEW YORK, March 3 (UPI) -- The teenager who gained internet fame for having sex with a hot pocket explains his reasoning behind the act of heated internet controversy. The teen, known by his Twitter handle VersacePockets, explained that his reason was to gain internet fame. In an ill-advised tweet, he said, "420 retweets and I'll [expletive] a hotpocket on Vine after I heat it up." He didn't explain the reason for "420," but it's probably the same reason he had hotpockets in the freezer in the first place.

It wasn't the most comfortable experience, as this teenager obviously did not think of the consequences of putting the more sensitive areas of his body into a pocket of microwaved cheese and ham.

"I tried doing it without a condom and it was just, like, way too hot," he said. "I put it in the fridge for a little bit and I was like, 'Dude, I’m gonna have to use a condom if I’m gonna actually stick my dick in the whole Hot Pocket.'"

His feat may have been for naught, since rather than giving him internet fame, he was kicked off of Twitter and Vine, and blocked by @hotpockets. Here's hoping that VersacePockets finds a more constructive use of his time.

Brooklyn Park MN
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Stamford, CT -- A 72-year-old substitute teacher at Westhill High School was put on suicide watch after he was allegedly caught masturbating in a school hallway while looking at school children Wednesday morning shortly after the school day began.

According to police, at about 7:33 a.m. Michael Luecke was spotted lying on the floor by a teacher's assistant who thought he was injured. When she got closer, she realized the man had his hand in his pants and he was fully aroused, police said.

School Principal Camille Figluizzi said she called police and turned over video surveillance of the incident. Figluizzi said class was in session at the time and the students who passed by Luecke's location in the Raynor house of the building did not seem to notice the incident. According to police, six students passed the location while Luecke was masturbating.

Q: Class was in session at 7:33 AM? WTF?

Chesapeake VA
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Seduction, Or they could just make the videos public complete with face pics of the two perpetrators. In which case I suspect they would prefer your punishment.

Wenatchee WA
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Misdemeanor? Cases where humans abuse animals should carry a sentence of at least a 10 year prison sentence as far as I'm concerned. Furthermore, mandatory castration should be part of the sentence. The scum should pay for it. And if they don't have the money to pay for it, make them clean public bathrooms until their debt is paid out.

Allenhurst NJ
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Herkimer County, New York (KRON) — Two men are facing criminal charges for allegedly filming porn videos with a farmer’s cows.

The farmer says he grew suspicious when his cows stopped producing as much milk and “seemed anxious.” So he set up a hidden camera to see what was going on in the barn when he wasn’t there.

Authorities say the cameras showed two men breaking into the barn in the middle of the night with a video camera. 35-year old Michael Jones is accused of running the camera while 31-year old Reid Fontaine performed sex acts with the cows.

The farmer then called the police and turned the surveillance tape over to them. The two would-be pornographers were arrested for misdemeanor sexual misconduct and released.

San Antonio TX
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its like the crap of if you take your interest levels down to 0 or block people it now blocks even those that you have corresponded with. I'd love to have our profile invisible to all except those we have corresponded with in the past. We aren't looking right now, and don't know that we will be for quite some time.

Louisville KY
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It's their site to do as they please but why ask for input if you are only going to delete it and leave the posts that do nothing but praise the "upgrade". As one poster put it, all they did was add a coat of paint.

Poland OH
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They're like the HuffPo. When I commented in response to another poster who said that Michelle Obama is the most beautiful first lady in US history, I made the absolute fatal mistake of expressing my opinion that I find her pretty not beautiful. Beautiful in my opinion was Jackie Kennedy. My god...they continued to allow the onslaught of attacks of rabid liberals. But censored every response to the attacks.

Allenhurst NJ
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Yes Nic, they only want to show that ALL the people are happy and have no complaints.. some of it sucks,, just wish they would fix things so they work then leave it alone... I hope they dont wanna "upgrade" the site for a longgggggggggggg time.

Spring TX
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WTF! The site asked for input on the new design they are previewing and when you go the thread, you will notice only positive reviews. That is because they have been systematically deleting every poster who is critical or offers suggestions to improve it.

SMDH

Poland OH
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TOPIC: WTF