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I know it seems harsh, and it's unfair to many singles who aren't idiots, but this morning I am again faced with a birdie from a single male, 110 miles away, profile is one day old, no pics, and the entire message was "Hot hot hot!".

I was probably more irritated than I should have been.... I don't know. Maybe it's unfair, but when we get an email for a single male like that (or couples with no pics) the word "Idiot" instantly comes to my mind, and I am probably not alone.

Chesapeake VA
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Yondude: I second your post. When I read this thread earlier this am, I had similar thoughts but you expressed them much better. Thanks.

Vero Beach FL
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Bah who cares. Be yourself that's a lot easier and the ones that doesn't work for aren't the ones you would have fun with anyway.

Only benefit of getting older is that you truly do give less of a shit what people think.

Lexington KY
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Shesmooth: Agree. Always felt it was a good thing to compliment someone whenever the opportunity presented itself. A great looking couple. A fantastic level of fitness. A well written profile. Those catch my eye and I just want to say thanks for that. If I enjoy something someone's done I think it's only fair to make it known. Maybe it's the nature of the LS that causes people to warily eye each communication from an unknown. Mrs. Sav makes good points and I won't argue since I'm new to this. Guess just a by product of bad experiences. Another lesson learned.

Washington DC
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This thread has taken a weird turn. I remember the days when flirting was acceptable in these forums, and often even welcomed.

Cape Canaveral FL
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For me it's this classic:

Sheldon: I'm not insane, my mother had me tested!

Washington DC
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My favorite Sheldon quote.

Sheldon: Why are you crying?

Penny: Because I'm stupid!

Sheldon: That's no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.

Cape Canaveral FL
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A sincere compliment is always appreciate but unfortunately far to often there is an ulterior motive . Point in case the whole topic of people in the forums who don't acknowledge when they've been complimented. A compliment is a gift and as a gift there should be zero expectation of a "return" . At least that is how it is suppose to work but obviously doesn't. Sheldon (Big Bang Theory) sums it up pretty well. "Sheldon Cooper: Oh, Penny. I know you think you are being generous, but the foundation of gift giving is reciprocity. You haven't given me a gift. You've given me an obligation. "

And before you disagree with me ask yourself how many Christmas gifts you buy out of pure joy and how many you buy simply because it is the expected thing to do . Think Secret Santa , that lonely spinster aunt you never see but buys gifts for your kids etc. Compliments aren't really much different, if you want to capture someones attention (especially here) compliment them, stroke their ego ! Perhaps that is why I don't tend to take compliments in this venue seriously...a few might be genuine but most are the just a rehash of what they've said to the last poster or in a certain instance "see what a great guy I am???" . Good intentions yes, sincerity.....not often. Most are just doing what they've been taught on how to be polite and how to captivate your audience .

The cynical , perceptive Mrs Sav

Anniston AL
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I love sincere compliments.

Keep doing what you are doing if you feel good about it. Anything you do will piss Someone off, so I just do what I think is right. I still piss people off, but I'm okay with that.

I'll shut people down quickly if I'm NOT interested. That way they can invest their time where it has a chance to be productive. Some might think this is rude. Others may see it as a kindness because they can move on.

Irving TX
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MRS DD. Honestly for the simple act of being kind. For most, I have no illusion of ever meeting. You for example are incredibly attractive and smart. But being in Texas and me in Maryland, I'm under no illusion we will ever cross paths. I don't see it as a tactic or a way to convince anyone to drop all and drive or fly thousands of miles for a quick "shag". But it seems most immediately respond with a "we're not interested" and so I'll cease and desist any further attempts to say anything. I understand it's due to the bad behavior of many SM or even other couples. But to me it's a bit sad.

Washington DC
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