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TOPIC: Facebook
Created by: toptim100
Original Starting post for this thread:
Just wondering if anyone has had any success finding swing partners using social networking like Facebook.

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There's another aspect we've come to appreciate by becoming friends with LS people on FB. We get more comfortable with them in the lifestyle by seeing their relationship with their spouse, their family, and their other friends.

No matter how many certs you see on a profile, when you get to see how they are in the regular world- their sense of humor, what they like, and the other things you might not pick up on at a party, it helps you get connected so that when you are at a party you don't necessarily need to invest a lot of time gaining that level of comfort before you start smiling, flirting, and more- if that makes any sense.

Bensalem PA
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i think all of our friends are swingers, some we have played with and some we have not. i think it is just easier that way and you dont have to be careful to watch what you say. many are facebook friends but they know not to discuss the lifestyle on there.

Philadelphia PA
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Got it. Yeah, it's not like I'm going to put up some sort of anti-vanilla force field around ourselves to keep all the non-swingers at bay, but at the same time, neither of us really has the desire to befriend people who aren't in the LS. We've got plenty of vanilla friends.....good friends at that, who we've known for years and we have no plans of severing those relationships, but we're at the point now where we really don't see the point in adding new people to the mix if we can't be open with them or don't feel comfortable being open with them about our LS.

T

Danville PA
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Ok, let me clarify. I completely understand about having swinger friends with whom you can have a friendship outside the bedroom. We have many like this.

That's not what I meant.

I meant, that the way you stated it, it sounded like you'd go out of your way to deliberately not make vanilla friends. As in vetting people prior to deciding whether a friendship with grow or not ;). Friendships, regardless of the activities that people choose for themselves, grow organically ;).

Rumson NJ
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"Dood, you're one of the more reasonable logical folks in these fora, surely you simply let the above slip out without much thought!"

No, not at all. The move to a new area where neither of us knows anyone (other than my mom) has allowed us to "swing freely" so to speak. We haven't played with every swinger we've met and don't intend to, so we basically have vanilla relationships with people who just happen to be swingers. How fucking great is that? I'll tell you how great it is. We can be completely open about ourselves with no regard to how we'll be judged for our chosen lifestyle.

Seriously, if I never make another friend outside of the lifestyle, that'll be fine by me. I'm sure we'll both end up making some truly vanilla friends here and there, but neither of us is in a rush to do so.

T

Danville PA
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I'm one of those strange anomalies, I have about 150 friends on FB in total. That's a combination of friends who are swingers, and non swingers. The swingers, are people that I trust, who respect and understand that keeping swinging topics out of normal conversations.

I would never ever, ever look anywhere for swingers other than an adult website like SLS (this is the only website that we're members of). We just don't need to swing that much!

"I think we're just going to roll with that and stop making vanilla friends."

Dood, you're one of the more reasonable logical folks in these fora, surely you simply let the above slip out without much thought!

Rumson NJ
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"Now as far as having swing friends on my facebook pages, I have a few on each of my pages, but only a select few."

Same here. I think I've got 5 LS friends on FB. Obviously I've met way more than 5 people in this LS, so I don't just add people for the sake of adding them. When deciding to/not to add people to FB, it's simply a matter of whether or not I'm comfortable with giving this person access to my life....regardless of them being in the LS or not.

T

Danville PA
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Our club has a "secret" FB page. It is actually quite handy for finding local members of our club, and for weeding out those that what we seek is not what they seek. I would not have found Mr Magic Hands if it wasn't for that group, he hasn't been to the club in a long time, and didn't start a SLS profile until after meeting us. We don't use FB to really search for people, but use the local groups on there.

Now as far as having swing friends on my facebook pages, I have a few on each of my pages, but only a select few.

Louisville KY
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"I thinks its sad if you have to use facebook and craigslist with all the sites you have for swingers."

How exactly is it "sad" that people use FB or CL for swinging? If anything, I'd say it's somewhat brilliant. Especially using the "secret group" option on FB. It's free and you don't have to wait days at a time to post new pics or worry about glitches. And I'd say it's really no more or less "secure" than this or any other LS site since you can choose which photos and albums are public or private and you can share them specific people.

The only real downside to it that I can think of is that since these groups are hidden, you're not going to have the same selection of swingers to choose from that a site like this would give you and the search options would be somewhat limited. Other than that, it doesn't seem like a terrible idea. I just have no interest in creating a separate FB acct because I'm too fucking lazy to switch back and forth between my regular acct and my "swinger" acct.

"And, your part of the problem with not being able to keep a personal life personal."

Anyone who chooses to put any personal info online in any way, shape, or form, is compromising their security and privacy. I don't care if you have an eBay acct, gmail, FB, Yahoo, amazon, SLS, or any other online presence. If you're online then you've created an opening for the entire world to learn about your dirty little secrets.

T

Danville PA
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I keep facebook to family and friends not fucks. I thinks its sad if you have to use facebook and craigslist with all the sites you have for swingers. And, your part of the problem with not being able to keep a personal life personal. My two cents , your mileage may vary.

Spring TX
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TOPIC: Facebook