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FORUMS General Discussions Open Forum Do you play together or separately
TOPIC: Do you play together or separately
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we feel that some jealousy and uncertainty can and does easily occur in many couples without relationship issues as they get use to being in the lifestyle and sharing their partner.

In most cases we have seen the couples work through their feelings and assure that their partners needs are met so that they are able to evolve, get use to those feelings and they basically go away.

Occasional feelings of jealousy or feelings of insecurity are common in the early days of being in the lifestyle. Doesn't mean every couple experiences this or that it can't be an issue if its acute. Our point is some of these feelings can be very normal in getting use to a new life situation.

We would think its why so many profiles say leave your drama at home and other no drama allowed messages. Though heaven knows some couples have drama in other ways!

Morganton NC
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We do both.

Jennings LA
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"I had it with my ex hubby and loved it back then and when my current hubby and I got together, it was at one of our group sex parties."

Hmm...

So you and your current husband met at a swingers event also attended (or hosted) by you and your ex.

Did you leave your ex for him? Was the breakup contentious?

That may be the source of some of your insecurity.

Fullerton CA
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We play together as that is why we entered the LS...we find it more erotic if we can see what eachother is doing

Kyle TX
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We have played separate but much rather be together because we enjoy watching and hearing each other with others. We have a very stable relationship it does not bother us at all to play separate,but just rather be together to enjoy together.

Mickey.

Rayne LA
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Have the two of you sat down and talked out your feelings? I would really soul search before going any farther with the lifestyle. Those feelings can eat away at you and will not be healthy for either one of you. It took 18 yrs. before my husband and I started talking about opening up our lives to others. Best Wishes Jess

Gardnerville NV
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"I guess my main fear is that he will play separtely and then leave me for someone else. "

This statement really stands out, and I copied it before I read Seduction's response and I totally agree.

You just simply will not enjoy this is you have that sort of feeling. And NO, not everyone has these feelings. Never once has either of us thought the other might get attracted to someone else, play separately, and leave each other for another person. If you have those insecurities, you might as well stop right now, because you ARE going to feel hurt, jealous, insecure, and have all sorts of "issues."

Work on your own issues before you "sit your husband down" for some sort of long talk and corner him into saying what you need to hear in order to feel good about the choices you are making. You both have to feel secure, stable, committed and you have to communicate openly and honestly, have a lot of trust and togetherness.

That said, since we do have those above qualities and we do have that between us, we are free to play separately if we wish...however, we MUCH prefer to be together...it's simply a matter of enjoying this whole thing a lot more when we enjoy it together.

Good luck, Gina

San Antonio TX
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We play in the same room, this way we can watch and what a turn on. Later we talk about our experiences , and some times we learn some new ways to please each other. Neither one of us want to play separately we love being and playing together

Gardnerville NV
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However, he has told me about other people out there he feels attracted to, and I guess my main fear is that he will play separtely and then leave me for someone else.

How is he "attracted 'to these other people. That in itself would matter to me.

Augusta NJ
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we have done both, to us it depends on the people we meet and comfort levels of those involved.

Burlingham NY
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TOPIC: Do you play together or separately