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CPL Drama, how to handle : Swingers Discussion 2171981011
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FORUMSGeneral DiscussionsOpen ForumCPL Drama, how to handle
TOPIC: CPL Drama, how to handle
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"Now we find out that she was doing so to please her husband."

That's what I was getting at in the first place. Maybe she caught him cheating before, or strongly suspected that he was and this was her last ditch effort to save the marriage. She was obviously against it from the start, but probably figured if she at least knew who he was sleeping with and with him while he was doing it, then she could cope with the infidelity and maybe he'd actually stop wondering.

Point is, she deserves her fair share of blame in the drama-fest that you're dealing with right now, too. Sure, the guy's a dog, but they both presented themselves as swingers when 1 of them clearly was not. Actually, I doubt the dude is really a swinger either. Sounds like he just found an easy way to get some strange and rolled with it.

It sucks, but if that's the worst you ever deal with then I'd say you're doing ok. Dust yourself off and swing on.

T

Danville PA
 
 
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i think her and moniu or whatever his name is should hook up.

Louisville KY
 
 
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ChouchoHachi

In all seriousness - are you even a real swinger profile, or do you just keep this profile for the fun of relocating it to funny names for places?

What are you here for? Did you really pay for a membership just to goof off with it?

Chesapeake VA
 
 
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We know of one couple (Gina you know who I mean) who turned their profile into a hatefest for each other after the husband was informed by his wife that she was in love with the m half of a couple.

Their tag line for a time was "OUT OF THE LIFESTYLE! SEE YOU IN CHURCH!"

Chesapeake VA
 
 
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Sounds like she's into beastiality. I'd report it!

Moron Buenos Aires Argentina
 
 
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Want to talk about drama, check this out, from a brand new profile. Why on earth would ANYONE in their right mind contact this, scorned woman:

Description : I WAS IN THIS LIFESTYLE FOR CLOSE TO FIFTEEN YEARS WITH WHO I THOUGHT WAS A LOVING HUSBAND! TO MY DEVASTATION I DISCOVERED NOTHING WAS FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH! THE BASTARD WAS CHEATING ON ME WITH SOME LITTLE SKANK! HOW CAN A GUY WHOM I SWUNG FOR AND WHO I LOVED THIS LIFESTYLE FOR GIVE UP ON THAT! WELL SO GOES LIFE! I AM PUTTING THINGS BACK TOGETHER AND REALIZE THAT GETTING BACK ON THE HORSE IS THE BEST THING TO DO!

Our fantasies and/or real experiences: MY TRUEST FANTASY NOW AND I THINK TO MENTALLY SOMEHOW GET EVEN WITH MY BASTARD EX-HUSBAND IS TO EXPERIENCE MY FIRST BLACK MALE! SOMETHING HE TOTALLY FORBID ME TO EXPERIENCE!

What else we'd like to say, do, see, hear about and/or learn: PLEASE FIND COMPASSION AS I TRULY AM STILL PUTTING MY LIFE BACK TOGETHER!

Colts Neck NJ
 
 
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CPLPFUN: Yes, the wife seemed very much into playing at first, matter of fact, she broke the ice the first time by getting nude! Now we find out that she was doing so to please her husband. You're right we don't find new friends (vanilla) if they go through bad times. We are not like that. That is why we are helping the wife, and will even be helping her move back home out of state. We have two other LS cpls that we do travel with and they are both very secure in their relationships. Was just wondering how many others have had this happen! I'm (female) new to all this.

Cocoa FL
 
 
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Do you have the same "no drama" policy for your vanilla friends? When they go through break ups and divorce do you feel like you need to find new friends? Cheaters are going to cheat, whether they're active in this lifestyle or not.

When you invite people into your life in any capacity, you're inviting the potential for drama. Our "no drama" policy pertains mostly to people who like to make mountains out of mole hills. I presumed (incorrectly I guess) that's what everyone else meant by it as well.

Also, between the fact that you start off by saying the husband was all about it but never mentioned the wife and then closed by saying that the wife has no desire to be in the LS anymore, it sounds a lot like she was never all that interested in the first place.

Maybe in the future you should stick to couples that have 2 enthusiastic participants instead of 1.

T

Danville PA
 
 
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Hot, A few years ago We had a similar scenario play out, where we were very clsoe with friends we knew in and out of this activity. to the point the male and I worked certain jobs together, what We didn't know is that he was living a thrid life If you would. He had 2 other women who he played with, and he used me as a cover when he would go with them, Telling his GF he was with me or working etc..... We didn't know until we were all in Ft Lauderdale that spring , when his GF blew a gasket, and they had a blowout in front of us. it was one of our worst trips and experiences since we had started swinging ( @ 8 years at the time) It wasn't our issue, it wasn't our fault but we ended up smack dab in the middle, not very fun when You are staying in a motor home. When it was all said and done they split then got back together, and then split again, All the while we didn't want to seem like we didn't care, or be percieved as rude. It did leave a sour taste in our mouth with regards to Now , we are social but tend to keep things as what they are . we still have a few couples we are clsoe with and hang out with, but not like we used to. when we travel now with friends , we make our own plans , do our own thing , and always have a Get out of dodge option. I guess our advice is that you just have to be cautious, not every body has the same outlook or agenda in life

Burlingham NY
 
 
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Even though Pandora has given me her blessing to go do whatever I want, I still feel weird about taking her up on her offer (Admiral Ackbar comes to mind...). I've turned down offers to join into some serious fun while I'm traveling just because of how guilty I'd make myself feel for doing it.

With that being said, the opportunity to cheat is plentiful in the LS, especially if you travel a lot. Unless your play partners contact your spouse to ask if solo play is alright, there's really no way of ever finding out until its too late.

I do feel bad for your friend though. I've been (though not in an LS capacity) where she's been.

Long Beach CA
 
 
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TOPIC: CPL Drama, how to handle