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Breast Cancer Awareness For the woman : Swingers Discussion 209835
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FORUMSGeneral DiscussionsOpen ForumBreast Cancer Awareness For the woman
TOPIC: Breast Cancer Awareness For the woman
Created by: ReadyToGo219
Original Starting post for this thread:
Ok,

Serious question. I am going out to visit my ex wife in Ca. She has breast cancer. I am already going to have my head shaved with the Breast Cancer Ribbon. I am considering having a tattoo on my heart with the same ribbon.

My question is simple.....how would you feel if an ex showed up with this tattoo?

Please no sarcastic comments.

Thanks..

Pete

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Ready, I am very sorry that your family is going through this and I hope treatment is successful for her. Do not worry....there is never a good time for things like cancer. You are doing an admirable thing for her.


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A BIG thanks for all of the replies. It helped ALOT!!!

Saint John IN
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I have to agree with Shelly and Sed and a few others, I also don't think you should shave your head, She is use to seeing you with hair so seeing you with a shaved head each time she looks at you reminds her that she has cancer.

As Shelly has said, treat her as you did before she had cancer, and when she does need someone by her side that's when you should be there.

Philadelphia PA
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Ready,

It is so great to hear that you wish to support her. I would not shave my head, nor tattoo anything on myself. I'd just be there, with her, supporting her. To me that would mean a whole lot.

The best of luck to your ex and you.

Allenhurst NJ
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ReadyToGo219, you've gotten some great advice here. All I want to add is that I admire you for wanting to do all you can to support your ex-wife in her battle. Not everyone would do that.

Sheboygan Falls WI
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Thanks for ALL of your feedback. Kinda strange I guess.....I never EVER thought that I would be discussing this topic.....Once again thanks!! Pete

Saint John IN
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The caregiver should never act as if they are not afraid. The caregiver is as much a part of the treatment of the sick as the sick person is themself. Without Jay being there giving me support, I would not have made it. And him pretending like he was not afraid would only have terrified me more. I am not saying scare the shit out of her, but do not act like its all sun and roses either. The best thing you can do for her is assure her that you are there for her. If she needs anything, you are there for her. The hardest part about being a cancer patient is what happens to others if this does kill you. What happens to the children, what happens to everyone. And cancer can envelope your entire life, it can start to be who you are vs. you being a woman who has cancer. If you talked about football before cancer, talk about football. If you went out before cancer, take her out if she feels up to it. Catch a movie. You want to be a person, not a patient. The main reason why I refused to shave my head and show off my bald head, as admirable as that is...was because I just wanted to be ME. I did not want to be the cancer patient, I wanted to be shelly. And just treat her like her. If she wants you to go to chemo with her, talk to her about shit you talked about before cancer. Just let her be her.


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My question is simple.....how would you feel if an ex showed up with this tattoo?"

First of all, I think what you are doing is a wonderful, sweet and beautiful thing. Showing your support for your ex, or anyone who is being treated for cancer is wonderful. With Jay and I, we have been together since I was 18 and he was 20..and we have 3 kids together. Any ex would have to accept from jump the fact that we would always be intertwined in our lives. I would not be upset at all because I think what you are doing is admirable. I cannot speak for anyone else though.


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You're very welcome.

Trust me, I understand.

Los Angeles CA
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Thanks Bridge....I mean that....

I have done A LOT of research. Trust me!! As you are well aware although words are comforting and even though she is my ex, it does not make it easier. But it will. I am sure you would understand, being a man, that you want to take the pain and hurt away from the people you care about.

But once again, I REALLY thank you for your feedback.

Thanks....

Pete

Saint John IN
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TOPIC: Breast Cancer Awareness For the woman